GF Left me after a year, got with my friend after 2 days, wants to still be friends.

[alishmee]

I know many people on these forums have been in similar situations as me.

 

Basically I was with my ex for a year. We were great for most of the relationship except the last few months she said we had been growing apart. I did stop showing appreciation the last few months and took her for granted. I was going through so much stress so I took it all out on her. She had enough stress in her life and my pity problems would just stress her out more. She was always there to talk when I needed her but I was never there. My friend(whom I met her through) was always there just like any good friend.

 

She finally broke up with me on Saturday. She told me she wasnt ready to be in a relationship at this time. Obvioulsy I wanted to try and work it out because whenever I had tried breaking up with her she asked me for the same and I agreed. But she wouldnt even think about it on Saturday. Finally on Sunday she told me to think about it when I told her I would definitely change for the better. Monday she was MIA and just told me she was busy with school. In the evening she finally told me she decided to stick with her initial decision and wanted to still be friends. I said if this is what she wanted she had to meet up with me and say it face to face.

 

She met up with me Tuesday and I tried pleading my case again. I even gave her gifts that were some of the most thoughtful things I ever got her. I noticed that she would never look me straight in the eye even when I asked. Finally she started crying and I asked if there was someone else and I had an idea who. She said yes and I asked what she felt about him. She said she liked him, then that she loved him. They actually go to the same school so they were hanging out after and talking and he was being supportive on Monday. They ended up taking a nap together and kissing. She told him she loved him and then she left and told me her mind was made. But on Tuesday I told her I loved her too and wanted to kiss her but would never put her in any uncomfortable position. She kissed me multiple times. We went back to my car and continued talking and she kept kissing me and told me she was 50/50 now.

 

But Wednesday the same thing happened as Monday. She decided to stick with the fresh and stable relationship. Whats worse is that we are all in the same group and she wants me to keep all this to myself and this is one of the hardest parts of this breakup. I mean how can I be the keeping the secret that my EX and friend are now going out.

 

I met up with her again Thursday and I knew it was over and we talked straight for 3.5hrs and she would talk about stuff that was very personal between us. I mean we were talking like we did at the peak of our relationship. Before leaving she hugged me and I was about to walk away and she kissed me on the cheek.

 

Saturday morning I called her because I had promised since I didnt do somethings for her before I would now. We started talking about family problems and she realized how much we had in common especially when it came to family stress. She knows how I much truly care and how certain problems can affect me. Obviously my friend is still there and I am trying to be cool with him too. Their relationship right now is almost exaclty like mine and hers was in the beginning. She even had me try hang out with her and him alone but I told I rather hang out with her alone and she agreed.

 

Questions that come to me are:

 

Has she just interchanged me and him? Will this become a cycle? What if problems occur between them?

 

Is it worth staying friends? I mean I feel at peace whenever I talk to her.

 

I know she cares about me but is not IN LOVE with me. Can someone fall back IN LOVE with you especially when they are purposely trying to keep you so close? Obviously I still hope she has some of those feelings for me but denies to tell me because she is in another relationship.

 

I know people don't just forget what's happened between them and their EXes and we've shared experiences that I doubt she will ever share with him unless they get married. She seems like she truly enjoys my company and wants to be close to me as we were when we were together but with "friends" label and not just being friends with me out of pity.

 

Its a very confusing situation because she initially told me she had given up the last two months but later told me she had mixed feelings.

[durkadurka]

I didn't even bother to read the contents of this. Tell her to find the nearest baseball bad a tell her to shove it where the sun don't shine.

[alishmee]

I didn't even bother to read the contents of this. Tell her to find the nearest baseball bad a tell her to shove it where the sun don't shine.

 

 

Weird this is he always liked her before me. I was pushing him to get with her for a while. I didnt even like her initially. Her and I just happened to happen.

[Von]

This is a classic case of string along game. So why are you playing? How can you accept being put 2nd place to some other guy too. That's just wrong.

 

Let her go and move on. You can thank me later.

[stillafool]

Listen, if you want a chance with this girl, let her go. Don't call her or be around her. She has to make a choice and she will miss the one who isn't around. It may take a couple of weeks but once you dissappear and show her how strong you are (that you can get along without her) she will want you. Don't be friends with her.