teeny Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 Alright so here goes... About Our Relationship: Just for the record, I'm 22, and my boyfriend is 21. I've been with my boyfriend for over 2 years, and we were best friends for about a year before that. I lived with him and his family about a year and a half. In April, I left California, and moved back to Maryland, because he felt like he needed some space. Alot of that was baised on a weight gain, but I got everything under control and we ended up back together, because he found out I was going to date someone else. The entire time we've been together we've never had a serious arguement, our biggest fight used to be over what goes better on toast butter or jam (not really,but they were never big fights.) The "Situation": About 2 weeks ago, my grandmother died, and I took alot of my anger out on him, also, I decided to change my Facebook picture, on complete accident I uploaded a picture with my chest out (fully clothed) as my profile picture. Because it was the day of the funeral service, I rushed off to the store with my mom and didn't bother to look at the picture. When I got home he had already seen it, and worse yet my other grandma, my aunts and everyon else had too. Ever since then he has barely talked to me and recently he asked for his space, but he wont even give me a complete reason why hes mad (I am quite sure they are pertaining to the above). I constantly text him because I get so upset I feel my heart stop (literally). I was supposed to go see him and look for a place to live in alittle over a week, I also took off from work, and paid for the plane ticket awhile back. The Problem: I know how they say, you "know" when you meet that person, and for being 22, i've been in relationships since I was 13, when I met him I just felt like he was the one. We talk(ed) 24 hours a day via texts, and even fell asleep on the phone when we werent together. We were best friends before we fell inlove, and I honestly feel like I wont ever find someone like him. We both don't drink, or do drugs, we occasionally go to church, and my biggest love is that he is super intelligent about cars and fabrication. We've talked about getting married and having babies constantly. And thats why I'm thrown, I honestly deep down knows he loves me, but I think he just can't see past the fact that he's mad at me. And if he didn't care about me why didn't he end it so much sooner. My Question: I'm wondering if I should make the effort to see him? After texting and calling him a ton last night with no answer, I decided it was best to give him his space for a week (2 days before I was supposed to see him.) I just wish someone who has maybe been in his position could give me some advice.
GrayClouds Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 Alright so here goes... About Our Relationship: Just for the record, I'm 22, and my boyfriend is 21. I've been with my boyfriend for over 2 years, and we were best friends for about a year before that. I lived with him and his family about a year and a half. In April, I left California, and moved back to Maryland, because he felt like he needed some space. Alot of that was baised on a weight gain, but I got everything under control and we ended up back together, because he found out I was going to date someone else. The entire time we've been together we've never had a serious arguement, our biggest fight used to be over what goes better on toast butter or jam (not really,but they were never big fights.) The "Situation": About 2 weeks ago, my grandmother died, and I took alot of my anger out on him, also, I decided to change my Facebook picture, on complete accident I uploaded a picture with my chest out (fully clothed) as my profile picture. Because it was the day of the funeral service, I rushed off to the store with my mom and didn't bother to look at the picture. When I got home he had already seen it, and worse yet my other grandma, my aunts and everyon else had too. Ever since then he has barely talked to me and recently he asked for his space, but he wont even give me a complete reason why hes mad (I am quite sure they are pertaining to the above). I constantly text him because I get so upset I feel my heart stop (literally). I was supposed to go see him and look for a place to live in alittle over a week, I also took off from work, and paid for the plane ticket awhile back. The Problem: I know how they say, you "know" when you meet that person, and for being 22, i've been in relationships since I was 13, when I met him I just felt like he was the one. We talk(ed) 24 hours a day via texts, and even fell asleep on the phone when we werent together. We were best friends before we fell inlove, and I honestly feel like I wont ever find someone like him. We both don't drink, or do drugs, we occasionally go to church, and my biggest love is that he is super intelligent about cars and fabrication. We've talked about getting married and having babies constantly. And thats why I'm thrown, I honestly deep down knows he loves me, but I think he just can't see past the fact that he's mad at me. And if he didn't care about me why didn't he end it so much sooner. My Question: I'm wondering if I should make the effort to see him? After texting and calling him a ton last night with no answer, I decided it was best to give him his space for a week (2 days before I was supposed to see him.) I just wish someone who has maybe been in his position could give me some advice. I sorry and this may not be the advice you are looking for but.... Like you said you have been in relationships since you was 13. It maybe time to take some time off and focus on getting to know yourself. While I sure you care about him, this does not seem like a great realtionships dispute the lack of fights. Someone who really cares about you does not "need space" because of you gain a couple of pounds. If some guy is not going to be honest with you and tell you the problems how can you know if they can be solved. I suspect there is more going on then him being mad at you. Relationship are about the quality of communication but quality of communications. Both of these points suggest this realtionship is not built to last. And you need some time to find what you want out of life regardless of who it in your life. Be single for awhile and focus on finding a great life based on yourself. Good luck, I wish you well.
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