stoploss11 Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 Can I salvage myself and any future? We never broke up because we were never fully in a relationship, she had issues that caused her to wanna commit suicide in June, I didnt know they were this bad and we didnt talk for just about a month other than a few random texts and smiles in the halls at work. We started chatting again slowly but after a month it was getting back to normal, she had that look in her eyes and was chasing me all over. Something came up again, and this time I don't know what it was. She shut down again, missed days at work and was crying several other days. She hardly looked up at all in work if she had to walk the halls. I let her know n June and again this time I was there for her. I have been jealous a few times that she talked recently at work with other people. Today I may have destroyed it all. We spoke on the phone and talked, she wouldnt answer anything about what hapened only mentioned she doesnt want to talk to anyone and the people at work are work people that talk about work stuff. It came up again she mentioned she just wants to go to work and go home and not talk to anyone. I responded and said I didnt think I was just anyone. She got emotional and worked up about it and we went back nd forth before she said...just stop, I want you to stop.... Side note, she has a baby at home and that is absolutely the priority, also issues with her mother and the babys father causing drama... My question is, I never did anything wrong both times she shut down, I tried to be there, I waited. Did my emotional outburst destroy any chance of a future? Before all this happened I'm certain she was in love with me. What can I do now?
Iconoclast Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 You do nothing. You smile and say hello when you pass. What part of "just stop, I want you to stop" do you not understand. She's got issues to resolve and does not want you to be a part of that. Leave her alone, and if she comes to you, play it from there.
sanskrit Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 She has destroyed the chance of a future with you by crapping all over your feelings and treating you rudely. You haven't done anything wrong, just move on to better options and feel blessed to avoid all her mentally disturbed, baby-laden drama going forward.
Author stoploss11 Posted September 26, 2010 Author Posted September 26, 2010 Its hard to sit back knowing she is so depressed.
Don Ho Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 She made it clear she wants to be left alone. There's nothing you can do about her depression. Unless, of course, you're Dr. Phil.
Author stoploss11 Posted September 26, 2010 Author Posted September 26, 2010 The man the myth the Ho, thx. Been waiting for your wisdom. I know I have to treat it like this is over which it may very well be. But how damaging was what happened yesterday? and does what she said mean its over, get out of my life, i never want to see you again....? Most relationships of my friends or others I hear about you know when a woman is over you. This is the first negative thing shes ever said but its still feels related to the me pushing for answers while she was on the verge of tears. I wish I didnt answer the phone when she called back BTW...
Don Ho Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 Thanks, it's nice to feel valued! LOL. Don't use her depression as an excuse to contact. That said, a depressed person can't handle much emotionally. Given what she said, you need to take it at face value, that she can't handle it emotionally and you should back way off and not contact. I think you should have let her call go to VM, but next time you know.
Author stoploss11 Posted September 28, 2010 Author Posted September 28, 2010 And knowing is half the battle... I have things to get sorted in my life as well. I guess we'll see where life leads us.
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