whatwhit Posted September 24, 2010 Posted September 24, 2010 Hello all the other heart broken hearts try to help me out here! I've made a post on his almost a month ago about my ending relationship. My boyfriend and I had been together for a year and a half. He ended it because (he stated this after a few weeks have gone by, so it's a much clearer statement) he wasn't happy with how things were going in our relationship, and felt like something needed to change; so he wanted space. Let me add after we broke up he kept telling me how hard this is, he realized he took me for granted, and he thinks we will get back together soon. We were in a LDR. I know stupid me I went to go visit him at his school. I guess I felt like I needed to go there to get answers I suppose. It was a mess of a weekend not b/c of him just some events ie. my car got towed etc. We hooked up, pretty much acted the same execept he called me by my first name instead of babe; which kinda hurt. The sunday we had a talk. He says he loves me, but he doesn't want to get back together and then break up after a month. When I get home things were kind of different. I mentioned wanting to see him for halloween, and he just didn't seem so into the idea making comments like, "we'll see, you just got here a month is a long ways a way to plan something like this", and I tried to bring the us subject up b/c i am more confused now then I was then, and hes just like we just had a deep convo, you bring it up too much, every time we talk about it it justs makes you sad. So after that point I decided you know what effs this I'm not calling him, and I didn't. So he didn't call me at all wednesday, and thursday he texts me good morning I didn't respond, then he texts me that he got a good grade so i didn't want to be rude cause he was so excited so I sounded happy for him, he called me I didn't respond cause I was in class..didn't call him back til like 3 hours later..kind of a awkward convo. So heres the message he sent me, I wrote him while I was at his school pretty much telling him I had a great time at his schools location even though some bad things happened, telling him I got upset b/c we were hooking up and it didn't really much anymore, telling him I think this break is helping out a little bit, telling him I want to get back together etc. and this is what he wrote me back. "I dont agree that the sex was meaningless the only difference was that we didnt have that official boyfriend girlfriend title. The feelings are still the same however and in my opinion that made it good not just in the moment but overall as well. I do think that this break is working to some degree in that I think we are both realizing some things that need to be fixed. I want to get back together with you but I dont want to rush back into it either. I broke up with you for a reason and I dont believe that it would be fair to you or us if we just got back together because we are both a little sad about it, Im really glad you came to visit minus you getting your car towed and all. We can talk about halloween sometime here in the future seeing as were both a little bit busy A and B we just had an overall nice weekend and dont need to rush to plan the next step quite yet. I love you as well and that is such a load of crap miss "coach whitney why are you walking funny"(inside joke) lol " The part I'm most confused about is , "We can talk about halloween sometime here in the future seeing as were both a little bit busy A and B we just had an overall nice weekend and dont need to rush to plan the next step quite yet." What next step does he think we need to make by me visiting him? Would you wait on someone who was saying these things? Thanks so much!
Maverick1983 Posted September 24, 2010 Posted September 24, 2010 I could be wrong but it seems as though he wants sex without dealing with the obvious relationship issues.He has too much power and I think you should try to reclaim some of that power.Don't make it easy for him.Either he wants you or not.If you do everything he wants then he won't be as quick making up his mind.
carhill Posted September 24, 2010 Posted September 24, 2010 Sounds like it was just one less night he had to jerk off. Sorry I wouldn't wait on this one. You have a lot of local options. Avail yourself of them. He can trick or treat alone or, at minimum, without your excellent company
pandagirl Posted September 24, 2010 Posted September 24, 2010 This is incredibly unfair for him to say he wants to breakup, but yet sees you both together in the future, because that is neither here nor there. No one can plan the future. He broke up with you, therefore his privileges of you have been revoked. I know it hurts. I'm sure there is love between both of you, but it's time to put your happiness first and try to start letting him go.
durkadurka Posted September 24, 2010 Posted September 24, 2010 Waiting would be stupid on your part. Just go do your own thing and if the natural opportunity arises then you can take it if that's what you want at the time. If he becomes a man that you can see yourself with, then you will know. I don't ever truly believe that an opportunity is ever 100% closed. If someone loves you, they loved you for an awfully good reason. That doesn't just go away.
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