jennie-jennie Posted October 2, 2010 Posted October 2, 2010 But how would you feel? You made a dig an unneccessary dig at BS and then try to dismiss a potential dig at OW. I expect better of you JJ. I would feel as I feel every day reading on LS where there are plenty of digs at OW all the time. It doesn't bother me. I am used to it. I am secure enough in my own perception of these matters. I posted my opinion about the article in the OP because it took me a while to figure out what was going on in it. Why are you so bothered by my comment and not by others in this thread? The article in itself was a dig at OW.
anne1707 Posted October 2, 2010 Posted October 2, 2010 I would feel as I feel every day reading on LS where there are plenty of digs at OW all the time. It doesn't bother me. I am used to it. I am secure enough in my own perception of these matters. I posted my opinion about the article in the OP because it took me a while to figure out what was going on in it. Why are you so bothered by my comment and not by others in this thread? If you feel that there are plenty of digs at OW, why do you feel there a need to make a dig at BS? Surely you are just feeding the same fire.
jennie-jennie Posted October 2, 2010 Posted October 2, 2010 I would feel as I feel every day reading on LS where there are plenty of digs at OW all the time. It doesn't bother me. I am used to it. I am secure enough in my own perception of these matters. I posted my opinion about the article in the OP because it took me a while to figure out what was going on in it. Why are you so bothered by my comment and not by others in this thread? The article in itself was a dig at OW. Edited to add: It was telling them they are not number one.
jennie-jennie Posted October 2, 2010 Posted October 2, 2010 If you feel that there are plenty of digs at OW, why do you feel there a need to make a dig at BS? Surely you are just feeding the same fire. Perhaps. But when I realized what the article was about I wanted to share that. To help other OW realize that they may very well be number one in spite of what this article is trying to tell them. I will admit that LS breeds a contempt towards the attitude of some of the BSs, former OWs and WSs here.
anne1707 Posted October 2, 2010 Posted October 2, 2010 Perhaps. But when I realized what the article was about I wanted to share that. To help other OW realize that they may very well be number one in spite of what this article is trying to tell them. And you do this in the infidelity forum when you so often complain of BS posting in the OW/OM forum in a derogatory manner. You can't have it both ways JJ Truth is the only one in an affair who is number one is the WS. Absolutely everyone else is at least second to them.
jennie-jennie Posted October 2, 2010 Posted October 2, 2010 And you do this in the infidelity forum when you so often complain of BS posting in the OW/OM forum in a derogatory manner. You can't have it both ways JJ Truth is the only one in an affair who is number one is the WS. Absolutely everyone else is at least second to them. I post on threads of discussion in the infidelity forum. I don't think I ever or at least very seldom posted on a personal thread on infidelity, unless it was one of a long time regular poster. This thread was about an article noone on LS had written. Can it be more impersonal? All affairs are not like your affair was. All WSs are not like you.
anne1707 Posted October 2, 2010 Posted October 2, 2010 All affairs are not like your affair was. All WSs are not like you. What is that supposed to mean?
jennie-jennie Posted October 2, 2010 Posted October 2, 2010 I post on threads of discussion in the infidelity forum. I don't think I ever or at least very seldom posted on a personal thread on infidelity, unless it was one of a long time regular poster. This thread was about an article noone on LS had written. Can it be more impersonal? All affairs are not like your affair was. All WSs are not like you. Edited to add: Many BSs have a habit of "greeting" newcomers on the OW/OM forum. That is way different from me posting on threads of discussion.
jennie-jennie Posted October 3, 2010 Posted October 3, 2010 (edited) Truth is the only one in an affair who is number one is the WS. Absolutely everyone else is at least second to them. What is that supposed to mean? That what was the truth for you as a WS is not the truth for all WSs. Unfortunately my MM suffers from putting what he perceives to be others' happiness before his own. Edited October 3, 2010 by jennie-jennie
anne1707 Posted October 3, 2010 Posted October 3, 2010 That what was the truth for you as a WS is not the truth for all WSs. Unfortunately my MM suffers from putting what he perceives to be others' happiness before his own. In the words of Francis Urquhart, you might very well think that but I could not possibly comment
bingedrinking Posted October 3, 2010 Posted October 3, 2010 If that were true, women should be interested sexually in their husbands even after many years - by the number of posts by married men, I think, this assertion has been very much proved wrong. It is women, on the other hand, who can't stay interested in a marriage. They are so unstable. Also by the article posted, women should never cheat on their husbands. I think, that assertion is also crap.
Dexter Morgan Posted October 4, 2010 Posted October 4, 2010 if its in men's nature to be selfish and cheat.....since the percentage of women and men that cheat in the marriage isn't that far off, what does that say about women? Ya ya...I know....if a woman cheats...its the man's fault:rolleyes:
yessy21 Posted October 4, 2010 Posted October 4, 2010 i know this sounds way off but can someone tell me how to post a question or use this? im new and i still cant figure it out.
porter218 Posted October 4, 2010 Posted October 4, 2010 Yes, there is a lot written about men and their testerone levels which peak and fall, and how the introduction of a new partner stimulates them. But the problem is, many women today also feel the same way: they grow bored with the same sexual partner over the long haul. And because they now earn their own money in record numbers, they too are seeking variety in record numbers. So, ultimately, monogamy is a choice, IMHO. And you get out of a relationship what you put into it. I've read about a study on this many years ago. It is somewhat true. And it goes further to say it is the opposite for women. Sexual pleasure becomes greater over time with the same partner but I think it plateaus somewhere but still more pleasurable then finding a new partner. Thats what the study I read says. Whatever. You choose if that stuff is so important to risk loosing the one you care about. Sex can always be made interesting again if both are willing to try.
pizzagirl Posted October 4, 2010 Posted October 4, 2010 Since women would be complaining non-stop if a man made the comments, I'm going to take that role over. How dare her bash men like that!!! What a generalization!!! Okay, point made. Anyway, the woman that made those comments obviously has issues. I've never cheated on any girlfriend I've had. It's wrong and I'd be putting not only my health, but her health at risk as well. You have to look at the big picture. I know I wouldn't like it if it was done to me, so I would never do it to anyone else. It is no longer copacetic to bash gays or blacks and most stereotyping is a non no yet crap like this article is so embedded in the psychology of many women that to print such tripe says a lot about the acceptance of the generalization that men are the cheaters. I have known may nice guys, whom my father was one and took all kinds of crap from my mother and yet, ne cheated. It set up issues with "nice Men" and made me examine my anger at my father for being an emotional punching bag. Not only do many women cheat i found i was drawn to bad boys because then i could excuse my behavior. A nice guy with regard for the truth I found boring and since they would not police my actions I could get away with bad behavior and i then would feel like crap(deservedly so). A jerk i could assume would cheat and so i could behave with the same standards. Many women and men hold the adage "nice guys finish last" as gospel. I have witnessed many women with the encouragement of girlfriends to explore and find themselves( female euphemisms for cheating). Trouble is many nice guys do not cut bait with abusive women, had my father done that maybe I would have had an example of how to be nice yet firm. I have always equated nice with weak. this article a warped map of an angry woman who probably prefers and chooses bad boys then whines " all men cheat". You can bet this author has daddy issues and may loathe nice guys as their behavior would not allow her to believe in such a warped map of reality.
redtail Posted October 5, 2010 Posted October 5, 2010 ... By nature men are selfish , 24 June, 2009 ... Personally, I feel sorry for the person that wrote this. It tells me more about the author than it ever does about her subject matter. People who have been wronged, especially more than once, can have a tendency to generalize about the people who have wronged them. So that everybody who now fits their description is suspect. The sad thing is, the only real commonality is themselves.
wheelwright Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 Firstly, what about love? Second, what about women doing this the same? Third, what do you want to know from us? I got the impression it might be that men are more likely to cheat and it's in their genes. So why do women cheat? Both sexes cheat, and the reasons are multiple. So why do you wish to generalise that men cheat for a biological reason? If I could be bothered, I could cite a whole load of articles citing reasons why women cheat, that are somehow ingrained. Bolded would be an interesting q.
InternationalPlayboy Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 The author of this post uses a fair amount of hyperbole to make her point, but beneath it all, there is a kernel of truth. Not every man will cheat but every man will think of it or occasionally want to at some point. Perhaps that's our neanderthal origins coming out, but most or some of us able to see those primal urges for what they are and move on. But admittedly, it is difficult sometimes. Very, very difficult. Painfully difficult.
Author Gypsy_Soul Posted October 9, 2010 Author Posted October 9, 2010 The author of this post uses a fair amount of hyperbole to make her point, but beneath it all, there is a kernel of truth. Not every man will cheat but every man will think of it or occasionally want to at some point. Perhaps that's our neanderthal origins coming out, but most or some of us able to see those primal urges for what they are and move on. But admittedly, it is difficult sometimes. Very, very difficult. Painfully difficult. Just curious, do Gfkr2, Yellowshark, and Happyatlast agree with InternationalyPlayboy about how very, very painfully difficult it is to not cheat?
HappyAtLast Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 Just curious, do Gfkr2, Yellowshark, and Happyatlast agree with InternationalyPlayboy about how very, very painfully difficult it is to not cheat? Goodness no. I've been married forty years, would never risk my marriage or causing pain to by cheating on the beautiful woman that I am fortunate enough to call my wife.
Owl Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 Just curious, do Gfkr2, Yellowshark, and Happyatlast agree with InternationalyPlayboy about how very, very painfully difficult it is to not cheat? Been married 23 years here..haven't found it anywhere near painful...let alone very, very painful...to avoid cheating. I'd agree with the observations that the author was likely rather bitter and angry when she wrote the article. I'd also suggest that it's in EVERYONE'S nature to be selfish...men most certainly haven't cornered the market here.
YellowShark Posted October 11, 2010 Posted October 11, 2010 (edited) Just curious, do Gfkr2, Yellowshark, and Happyatlast agree with InternationalyPlayboy about how very, very painfully difficult it is to not cheat? I can only answer for me. I don't find it hard "not to cheat," I find it harder to cheat. I guess I have evolved past the caveman phase! Sure I see women who excite me physically every day, but I am not some bulldog that needs to hump every leg that I see. Additionally I take great pride in being honest, moral, and a partner who can be trusted. It makes me feel really good about myself as a man... rather than some drooling, selfish guy who throws his spouse under a bus for sex because I have mommy-doesn't-love-me issues. Edited October 11, 2010 by YellowShark
InternationalPlayboy Posted October 25, 2010 Posted October 25, 2010 Goodness no. I've been married forty years, would never risk my marriage or causing pain to by cheating on the beautiful woman that I am fortunate enough to call my wife. I've been married 12 years and have not cheated, but will admit the temptation is significant sometimes. I have no plans and feel I never would cheat, but when there's nothing going on at home I'll admit temptation is painful to pass up.
Recommended Posts