Redfive Posted September 22, 2010 Posted September 22, 2010 Hey all, A little back ground first. I'm in my mid 30's, and was married for 12 years. I divorced about 3 years ago due to a cheating spouse. That divorce was the result of about 7 years if ups/downs and 3 separations, and of course, marrying too young. I desperately tried to make it work, but it didn't . Fast forward... I've now been dating a young 22 old girl who despite her age is simply amazing. Mature (for her age), beautiful, loves my daughter, a giver, and is committed to me. Seriously any man would be honored to have her. I'm just struggling with it though. We are 4 hours apart, and keep finding myself struggling. Weve been together for a year and half(long distance). She is ready to push on into an engagement, and make the move to where I am. She is very realistic about marriage too. No fairy tale. No happily ever after, but working on it. I feel like this isn't right sometimes, but this is literally the best relationship I've been in. So why am I warring in myself? Also, if I break this off I have no family or friends who aren't married, so it's like going all alone again. I want this to work because the girl is that good, but I can't get my heart to cooperate. I wrote this on my phone so forgive the rambling ....
strangeways Posted September 22, 2010 Posted September 22, 2010 Your situation doesn't sound too far off from mine. Been married, separated, got with a 28 yo, I'm 41. Together about 1 year. She was mature, loved my sons and was great with them, sure she was ready to move to the next step of moving in etc etc. Differences: I was only separated about 4 months. What happened, 4 days after she moved in she bailed. Couldn't take the commitment. You're absolutely right to be wary. People change and they can change quickly. The reality is often not what they expected. Don't want to put a downer on it as this is just my experience, no relationship is guaranteed. Just be careful.
strangeways Posted September 22, 2010 Posted September 22, 2010 Should have added that she does have, I believe, commitment issues which stem from her past but she made all the right noises. Sounds like you've discussed things. It's a leap of faith I'm afraid, I leapt, I got burned, doesn't mean you will.
Trovador Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 Please, whatever you do, don't let your gf see your insecurities and fears... I say, enjoy the moment and wait some more time... infatuations end, real love grows every day... what's the hurry? Having said that, aren't there times when you wonder where's the catch? I lived the same as you, a too much younger gf, too much pretty, too much hot... all ended because the age difference but I still wonder about the catch...
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