bohogirl Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 It seems to me that once you have decided to reconcile intimacy would be the quickest way of "bonding". I could be way off base of course. How long was it before you could be intimate with your spouse without thinking about s/he pleasuring the AP?
someday Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 I'll bite.... We never stopped being intimate and I've never thougth about the xow while being intimate with my H....that's just sick, IMO.
greengoddess Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 LOL are you enjoying yourself? Why is it that you are asking this question? How will this aid you in your recovering from the horrendous way you were treated by "your" mm? I know ten years is a long time to put into a relationship and you must be in a lot of pain but I can not possibly see how this question can help you?
Dexter Morgan Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 How long was it before you could be intimate with your spouse without thinking about s/he pleasuring the AP? here we go with more subtle (or not so subtle) needling of the BS's here. *sigh*
Minnie09 Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Maybe asking questions in a forum helps her heal? After 10 years in an inappropriate relationship, of course you're hurting. Same as the BS who needs all the affair details in order to be able to start forgiving/healing, this might be an OW's approach to obtain as much info as possible. Since she's not in a position to ask these questions personally, she resorts to a forum. I just don't know if the answers she gets are authentic. They may cause even more pain.
greengoddess Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Minnie I like to think good of people. I would like to believe that but it appears that every post she makes is worded to either hurt the BS's or to take a swipe at them and it is a good mix of posters who seem to feel this way not just bs's.
Mimolicious Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Maybe asking questions in a forum helps her heal? After 10 years in an inappropriate relationship, of course you're hurting. Same as the BS who needs all the affair details in order to be able to start forgiving/healing, this might be an OW's approach to obtain as much info as possible. Since she's not in a position to ask these questions personally, she resorts to a forum. I just don't know if the answers she gets are authentic. They may cause even more pain. I just don't think the questions she asks are authentic. What about them apples?! It's pretty lame that people have so much free time to create rukus. Don't they have some little INTIMACY to go cater to?! Well, you know... since they are so "in-love with a new person" wtf does it matter what a BS does, if you're someone else's "GF" at this point. Sham. Shouldn't focusing on your new relationship help you heal? Halloween coming... (((PAUSE)))
donnamaybe Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Yup. Just another not so veiled attempt at hurting BS's, trying to place the image of their WS making love to another woman in their heads.
Dexter Morgan Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Yup. Just another not so veiled attempt at hurting BS's, trying to place the image of their WS making love to another woman in their heads. DM, we may not agree at all in politics, but you hit the nail on the head when it comes to issues such as this. Good call again.
Silly_Girl Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 I put her on Ignore ages ago. But I have fun reading all your replies and trying to guess what she's posted :p
Minnie09 Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 I'm a BS, but nothing she's posted hurts my feelings. But I can't speak for others, of course, and I can totally understand how posts like hers can stir up unpleasant memories. I get it. However, I just saw how MANY detailed questions have been asked, each of them opening a new thread, and the one where MM watches her sleep seems to be directed at not only some random BSs, but someone in particular. That's odd.
donnamaybe Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 I'm a BS, but nothing she's posted hurts my feelings. But I can't speak for others, of course, and I can totally understand how posts like hers can stir up unpleasant memories. I get it. However, I just saw how MANY detailed questions have been asked, each of them opening a new thread, and the one where MM watches her sleep seems to be directed at not only some random BSs, but someone in particular. That's odd.That's because she claims the BS of her former MM is on LS.
Mimolicious Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 I'm a BS, but nothing she's posted hurts my feelings. But I can't speak for others, of course, and I can totally understand how posts like hers can stir up unpleasant memories. I get it. However, I just saw how MANY detailed questions have been asked, each of them opening a new thread, and the one where MM watches her sleep seems to be directed at not only some random BSs, but someone in particular. That's odd. Well, she claims that her MM's W is on LS. Clown! I know one person that soon will be thinking on another chick while splacking BG, her Boo. She seems to pay more attention to her past, rather than focusing on her future. You know, Karma does has it's own ways though...
greengoddess Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Well, she claims that her MM's W is on LS. Clown! I know one person that soon will be thinking on another chick while splacking BG, her Boo. She seems to pay more attention to her past, rather than focusing on her future. You know, Karma does has it's own ways though... LOL Read Bohogirls signature quote at the bottom of her posts. So perfect.
Minnie09 Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 That's because she claims the BS of her former MM is on LS. I didn't know that. Interesting approach on how to take revenge...
Owl Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 I'll play. My wife and OM were never actually "together"...it was an LDR EA. Our intimacy had waned as her EA grew with OM. It was about a month or so after d-day, the same day she truly made her choice to reconcile our marriage, that we were 'intimate' after d-day. Now, he'd pressured her a lot to cyber...which she just really couldn't do. She admitted in counseling to fantasizing...but that was the extent of it. So the only issue we had to deal with was her feelings of betraying the OM by being intimate with me...but she quickly got over that. I'm curious about the other side of this though...how rough is it to know that the WS is still intimate with the BS during the affair?
Mimolicious Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 LOL Read Bohogirls signature quote at the bottom of her posts. So perfect. Sometimes it's best to forget how you feel and remember what you deserve And if we really got what we deserved, we wouldn't like it much!
donnamaybe Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 And if we really got what we deserved, we wouldn't like it much! Hey! Speak for yourself! lol I get what I deserve, and I LOVE it!
ladydesigner Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 It seems to me that once you have decided to reconcile intimacy would be the quickest way of "bonding". I could be way off base of course. How long was it before you could be intimate with your spouse without thinking about s/he pleasuring the AP? Ok I'll answer since I was first a BS. I was and have been intimate with my spouse. My H's OW was not much of a looker so don't really care to imagine the dirty details of their escapades. My H can use those mind memories when he..well you know;)
freestyle Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Had this question been asked by a BS, I would've answered. In this context, it smacks of schadenfreude to me.
donnamaybe Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Had this question been asked by a BS, I would've answered. In this context, it smacks of schadenfreude to me.Or at least an attempt, but how can one gloat after being led on for 10 years and then dumped?
Mimolicious Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 How long was it before you could be intimate with your spouse without thinking about s/he pleasuring the AP? Let's play your candyland... Men and woman think about me while being intimate. They look at my poster. So.... my xH had to think about how OM/OW thought of pleasuring me while attempting to pleasure their OW/MM/MW/BS/CEO/CFO/PO/PR/EA/CIA/FBI/DEA... Oh, all of this while trying to be intimate. Not the other way around...
Mimolicious Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 This is the best post I have ever read. EVER! You should consider using this as your signature. If you don't, can I? :lmao: Sure! Go ahead bebe!
Hazyhead Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Had this question been asked by a BS, I would've answered. In this context, it smacks of schadenfreude to me. As have her other threads, I think. OP's desperate to hear that there ain't ever gonna be an R [the M] that compares to the A [her] and I think we're going to get these threads until she hears it. Anyone want to go ahead? Trying to find misfortune in others is a sign of deep insecurities.
Mimolicious Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 (edited) Popularity breeds comtempt. It's hilarious how people think that the lives and every moment of others will revolve around them but it's actually far more pathetic for those who actually allow such thing. In my case, I did for a hot-minute. Of course, yes it shattered me to know that the person that I married and had basically grown up with would do such a shameless act. Regardless of whatever he or she tried to make it about, it was all a sack of shyte to make themselves feel better. I, just had to look in the mirror. Not exactly for physical attributes but for transparency. Something that someone loaded with lies, regrets and capable of deceiving and hurting others doesn't have the pleasure of sensing. So fack what anyone wanted to think about while being intimate, odds are they can't know what the so-called "unwanted" person could be really thinking about. Why do OW swear that they are an upgrade? LMAO! Not in my case! I'm ground-up, she's a fixer upper. Edited September 21, 2010 by Mimolicious
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