So then guys... how do us girls get you back?

[Sunny-side-up]

So, guy likes girl, chases girl, gets girl.

They break up.....

 

A guy when he wants to get back with a girl does sweet stuff... girls like that....

 

Whats a girl supposed to do, since doing sweet stuff would have guys running a mile!?

 

Any suggestions?

Whats the best way of getting the guy?

[Billie The Puppet]

Same way, no contact, chance meetup in the future which may or may not spark something. I don't believe in a formula to get back an ex otherwise my ex and I would be together.

 

Basically it has to come naturally.

[collegeguy_24]

more information needed, who broke up with whom, and why?

[Woggle]

It depends on the guy and the reason for the breakup.

[Sunny-side-up]

It depends on the guy and the reason for the breakup.

 

Does that matter? Say you just love her? How does she get you back?

 

Perhaps you broke up because you had many differences or it was a time in your life where you had to focus on yourself. Perhaps she neglected you and you cheated on her, when she found out she ended it but regardless of that you still love her.

[Sunny-side-up]

more information needed, who broke up with whom, and why?

 

She would have broken up with you. I think when a guy quits with a girl its pretty final.

 

For all the other detail... simply... you still love her.

[Thorgs]

Does that matter? Say you just love her? How does she get you back?

 

Perhaps you broke up because you had many differences or it was a time in your life where you had to focus on yourself. Perhaps she neglected you and you cheated on her, when she found out she ended it but regardless of that you still love her.

You broke up with him and you are sure he still loves you? How long ago did you break up, any NC, etc etc.

 

If you truly want him back, then go to his house and beg! After all, when us dumpees are told to go NC for ourselves, if the dumper truly wants us back during that time, they will come banging the door down wanting us back.

[Sunny-side-up]

You broke up with him and you are sure he still loves you? How long ago did you break up, any NC, etc etc.

 

If you truly want him back, then go to his house and beg! After all, when us dumpees are told to go NC for ourselves, if the dumper truly wants us back during that time, they will come banging the door down wanting us back.

 

We broke up 2.5yrs ago after a 4 yr relationship. We toyed with getting back in the first few months but it was too soon... I started seeing someone else and so did he. We were going to hook up about a year ago but he called it off since he was trying to break up with his gf (Id already broken up with my bf), I told him never to contact me again..... six months later I get a text telling me he still loves me. (I never replied)

I called him a few weeks back to see how he was, a cordial conversation. After he sends me a text to say he hopes he gets the chance to say all the things he wanted to say but didnt whilst we were on the phone.

I text him the next day "keep in touch"..

 

Thats it.

 

We've done the NC thing.... months at a time. I did want to get him back but the time wasn't right back then and I didnt handle it well at all.

 

This is why I'm asking,

 

How do us girls get you guys back?

[Thorgs]

We broke up 2.5yrs ago after a 4 yr relationship. We toyed with getting back in the first few months but it was too soon... I started seeing someone else and so did he. We were going to hook up about a year ago but he called it off since he was trying to break up with his gf (Id already broken up with my bf), I told him never to contact me again..... six months later I get a text telling me he still loves me. (I never replied)

I called him a few weeks back to see how he was, a cordial conversation. After he sends me a text to say he hopes he gets the chance to say all the things he wanted to say but didnt whilst we were on the phone.

I text him the next day "keep in touch"..

 

Thats it.

 

We've done the NC thing.... months at a time. I did want to get him back but the time wasn't right back then and I didnt handle it well at all.

 

This is why I'm asking,

 

How do us girls get you guys back?

Hmm, sounds like he already wants you back from what I just read.

[Sunny-side-up]

And, go to his house and beg? LOL!!!

 

This is what gets me about this getting back together, second chance stuff.... what if the two people involved are just as scared as each other and are thinking that it should be the other person who should be contacting them??

 

Girls are told to let the guy chase them... so we can't beg can we?

 

 

I'm confused

[Ajax]

After all, when us dumpees are told to go NC for ourselves, if the dumper truly wants us back during that time, they will come banging the door down wanting us back.

 

Bang down his door and tell him you want him back. It sounds like you've pushed him away, so you're going to have to go all out.

 

Wish my ex would come bang down my door...

[Thorgs]

And, go to his house and beg? LOL!!!

 

This is what gets me about this getting back together, second chance stuff.... what if the two people involved are just as scared as each other and are thinking that it should be the other person who should be contacting them??

 

Girls are told to let the guy chase them... so we can't beg can we?

 

 

I'm confused

Well, you dumped him, so he probably wont chase, but he's said things to you that make it seem like he wants to be back with you.

[Sunny-side-up]

Hmm, sounds like he already wants you back from what I just read.

 

So he wants me back? I'm not sure whether he just wants to know someone loves him and I'm an easy target. What do I do now?

I already text him to keep in touch... I've not heard anything since?

How do I get him back without chasing? I waited for him to suggest we meet but he never did....

[Sunny-side-up]

Bang down his door and tell him you want him back. It sounds like you've pushed him away, so you're going to have to go all out.

 

Wish my ex would come bang down my door...

 

Ajax, this is where I messed up last time... I was pretty P***ed when he refused to meet me back then... he just said he needed to do right by her and get things sorted his side firstly. He also told me not to wait and it would be unfair of him to ask me to. He also promised to drop some gifts over the holidays... when he never showed up he told me he'd "forgotten"

Yes.... I was really p***ed then, which was why I told him to just get out of my life for ever..... I couldnt depend on him.

[Thorgs]

Why not just call him and have a heart to heart and find out what he really wants? I will never contact my ex who dumped me ever again. Mainly because I'm scared of hell of her lol.

[threebyfate]

Okay, so this guy cheats on you, cheats on his girlfriend with you then backs out of leaving her for you, promises to see you during the holidays and doesn't.

 

Does it help your decision-making process when I break it down like that?

[Thorgs]

Okay, so this guy cheats on you, cheats on his girlfriend with you then backs out of leaving her for you, promises to see you during the holidays and doesn't.

 

Does it help your decision-making process when I break it down like that?

I wish this was FB so I could "Like" this comment.

[lunita]

Okay, so this guy cheats on you, cheats on his girlfriend with you then backs out of leaving her for you, promises to see you during the holidays and doesn't.

 

Does it help your decision-making process when I break it down like that?

 

That pretty much clarifies it with everyone I think!

[Sunny-side-up]

Why not just call him and have a heart to heart and find out what he really wants? I will never contact my ex who dumped me ever again. Mainly because I'm scared of hell of her lol.

 

I'm scared of calling him to go over our relationship again. We've only spoken once in 12mths and I wouldn't know where to start! It'd just be strange to call up and bluntly ask what he wants from me...

I'd just expect to hear the same as before....

"when I'm drunk my feelings take over.. when I'm sober, I can think logically"

Him being terrified of going through what he's just recovered from (our break up) and me asking what he wants from me? I don't think that will work.

Will it?

What would your GF have to do to get you back?

[Sunny-side-up]

Okay, so this guy cheats on you, cheats on his girlfriend with you then backs out of leaving her for you, promises to see you during the holidays and doesn't.

 

Does it help your decision-making process when I break it down like that?

 

Yes, he cheated on me in the end...(after our long break up I now realise my part to play in that.. another story)

However he didn't cheat on his GF. When we started texting, he split with her. At the time of us arranging to meet he'd already left her but didn't want to meet with me because he needed to finalise the situation with her... she didn't take it well and they were financially involved, she was still begging etc. He felt responsible for her.

[Thorgs]

What would your GF have to do to get you back?

Oh, if you read my thread you'll know she has to do a hell of a lot to get me back and to get my trust back. To list what she'd have to do would be too long to even post!

 

Why not call him and say he's been on your mind a lot lately and that you'd like to go out and get lunch or something?

[Cee]

What some of the other posters said was spot on.

 

Go to him & beg him to come back. I did that and got my boyfriend back. But I was the dumper and completely at fault (I didn't cheat. Was emotionally unbalanced). I was lucky he didn't say "Screw you".

 

Forget your "He's the guy" stuff. Getting someone back requires a brave and decisive leap. Else you'll be flopping around for another few years.

 

By the way, my story ended well, but not as you expect. I left him again, destroying his heart AGAIN. I got professional help & he got a better girlfriend.

 

Get with him or don't get with him. In the end, things will have a way of working out just fine.

[Sunny-side-up]

Oh, if you read my thread you'll know she has to do a hell of a lot to get me back and to get my trust back. To list what she'd have to do would be too long to even post!

 

Why not call him and say he's been on your mind a lot lately and that you'd like to go out and get lunch or something?

 

Hi Thorg, have you got a link to your thread? Sorry, I'm new and still navigating the place!

[Sunny-side-up]

What some of the other posters said was spot on.

 

Go to him & beg him to come back. I did that and got my boyfriend back. But I was the dumper and completely at fault (I didn't cheat. Was emotionally unbalanced). I was lucky he didn't say "Screw you".

 

Forget your "He's the guy" stuff. Getting someone back requires a brave and decisive leap. Else you'll be flopping around for another few years.

 

By the way, my story ended well, but not as you expect. I left him again, destroying his heart AGAIN. I got professional help & he got a better girlfriend.

 

Get with him or don't get with him. In the end, things will have a way of working out just fine.

 

HI Cee,

No, I didn't cheat on him either... I was unbalanced through the relationship. Looking back , he doted on me completley and I really made him work for everything.

SO, forget the girl/guy stuff and call him?

 

Thorgs... your suggestion sounds good.

[Thorgs]

Hi Thorg, have you got a link to your thread? Sorry, I'm new and still navigating the place!

It's a super long thread, but if you're up for an entertaining read, here it is

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t236526/