Not the love ace Posted September 20, 2010 Posted September 20, 2010 Hey, this might be a little or very long but I was hoping I can get some insight. Instead of making 3 different threads on here, I thought I can put all three separate questions on one thread instead of taking up space on the topics. They'll be in this order, hope you can help, thanks. A)Mother and her Husband (NOT my stepfather I take offense to that) B) My sister and her relationship with her father C) My family doesn't respect me and always cast doubt on me A) Its been a decade already since I have been dealing with my mother and her husband though its been 7 years since they have been separated and though things have gotten better in the household without him (no more physical and verbal altercations, no more molestation, no more of his reign of tyranny and his sudden outburst of rage) my mother still beats around the bush to see him and in some ways it bothers me. Plus, I see shades of him in her. Why it bothers me? Because like I mentioned, this guy has molested me and my sister and I just feel betrayed in a lot of ways. This guy was terrible to me and my sister in more ways than one. When she beats around the bush to see him and my sister or I baby sit I feel like we are doing him a favor as well when she hangs out with him. She claims that she isn't but I have physically caught her with him multiple times hanging with him and I have friends who have even bumped into them hanging out. I no longer baby sit (my brothers I love them dearly but those are his off spring as well) because I feel like I've done enough and I can't be played as a fool. They should take my brothers if they want to see each other. I'm tired of my mother acting as if I am completely oblivious to this and not know whats going on. My sister too acts like a real dummy and I think she doesn't want to believe they are still hanging out, the same with my grandmother. I live with my mother so I basically just keep my mouth shut until I move out but its really bothering me because I know she's taking advantage of me being here and her getting to be with him. She reaps the benefits of me cleaning, cooking and being responsible in many ways, something her LAZY, dull husband won't do for her if they live together when me and my sister leave. Besides moving out (whenever that is) what else should I do? Its pissing me off and I just want to blow up sometimes because I feel totally betrayed. B) My sister I feel puts up WAY too much with our (biological) father. She's much too nice and tolerant of his selfish, conceited nature. This guy has stole thousands of dollars from claiming us on his taxes throughout our whole childhood and teenage years and NEVER gave us a dime or a penny for that matter. Times when we desperately needed it he spent it on himself. It goes beyond money because when we were being abused by my mothers husband he was never there because "my mother didn't allow him to see us". He always left us high and dry and whenever he did do something, he gloated so much. People who don't know the real story of my father, think he is such a wonderful person and it irritates the living hell out of me! No exaggeration on my side here, he's always been a dead beat dad and always felt like we need to keep in contact with him. I never feel like anyone owes me anything but IF anything he owes us the world. However my sister is too busy looking for the father figure in her life that she never truly had and forgives him for EVERYTHING. Recently he stole 3,000 dollars of HER money from her income tax by claiming her and she totally forgave him. Again, its not about the money but the principle. This guy constantly cheats on his wife in front of my sisters face, he constantly ****s on my sister and I and she keeps saying "I don't hold grudges". She's an adult, I know and I see that she's trying to work things out with him but he needs to be kissing her ass. She deals with him out of pity because there's so many people who dislike him and cut him off but I feel like he deserves it. If everyone leaves him MAYBE he'll get the hint and come fool circle but as long as my sister gives him kool-aid he'll be screwing her over. C) Ugh, my family. I'm a motivated and strong willed person and I don't really need anyone's support. You have to write your own destiny and be able to be your number one supporter and fan because it has to come from you, at least in my opinion. Doubters and naysayers definitely help me become more driven and motivated and makes me work harder. However, its nice to hear people tell you that you can make it and respect you. My family doesn't respect me and think I'll be pretty much a loser for the rest of my life. Since I don't have a steady girlfriend and not talking about having a kid or getting married right now (I'm 24) and I don't have a super high paying job they think I'll remain with my mother for the rest of my life and be a loser and I can tell. The way they talk to me as if I don't know what I'm doing or incapable of doing anything. All my responsibilities that I handle with no problems (keeping the house tidy, taking care of my brothers and family, paying bills etc) get overlooked. I feel that some people in my family still look at me as a little kid because of my humor and for the fact that I'm a "big kid" in a sense that I play video games, still watch anime and collect figures etc. It bothers me that they can't except me as an individual but I guess there's nothing I can do until I move out, get a car, and show them that I am more responsible? Well, thanks guys, hope it wasn't too long. I tried to make it as short as possible.
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