fabio10 Posted September 20, 2010 Posted September 20, 2010 My ex girl has been in limited contact the last few days due to the fact my dad has become ill, the contact was light hearted enough but yesterday I began to vent in a way for some reason. Now I totally accept it is over as many of you that know my story have seen me evolve to this point over the last few weeks. But Im wondering why I vented so implusively it just came out yesterday we were talking and she asked was she easy to get over half joking and without hesitation I was honest and said ' no not at all ' her face changed as I said it then I followed on saying 'I dont know why you are my first love, but I really wish you werent' it just came out of me and then she replied 'I wish I was not your first love either' now I dont know if she said that that because what I said hurt her or not. Then she said I heard you were planning to travel and again without even thinking I said ' yes I am to get over you' her face changed again and she said I hope you know 'I dont hate you' why she said this I dont know.But my main concern is I know its over but yet I implusively vented why??? Your opinions please !
Don Ho Posted September 20, 2010 Posted September 20, 2010 Ouch! Bro, Bro, Bro. And we thought you were doing better! WTH? Obviously you're still butthurt about her dumping you. Next time try to engage your brain before you mouth. It's done now, so drop it and don't bring it up if you talk to her again. And don't be a pussy and apologize.
Author fabio10 Posted September 20, 2010 Author Posted September 20, 2010 Hey Don man, tell me about it and after her being kind and concerned for my familys' wellbeing I get another dose of foot in mouth syndrome, I really dont know where it came from. I didnt try worming and saying sorry and she texted again late last night so it must'nt have pissed her too much,Bro I just would really like to get our friendship back like it was before we got together romantically I know some people would say thats not possible but I would, I know its over and we aint together totally totally accept that but why oh why cant I control my big ventful gob have you got a gag or something for me
Don Ho Posted September 20, 2010 Posted September 20, 2010 Maybe write out all your frustrations and then throw it away or delete it.
Author fabio10 Posted September 20, 2010 Author Posted September 20, 2010 Cheers for your time again Don , hows that ladyfriend of yours? Actually starting to see some results from the gym going ya must try write it down dont want another slip,
Don Ho Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 That just your subconscious letting words out. That's why you should write it down and or talk to your friends about what you're feeling. My gal? Fine. All 105 lbs of her. I think this is the first time I have ever wanted a GF to gain weight!
Author fabio10 Posted September 21, 2010 Author Posted September 21, 2010 Haha you'l have to bring her to afew drive throughs my man ya your right I think whats going on with my dad weakened my control again, I know she is hurting to as lame as it sounds she told my sister that she dreads seeing me as she cant move on ! Job hunting at the min as decided against going back to Uni I have 2degrees as it is so hopefully things shall start looking up, have to admit tho that I'am starting to get excited about the future !
Banega100 Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 hey buddy. how come it ended, if you're both hurting? what's the crack?
Author fabio10 Posted September 21, 2010 Author Posted September 21, 2010 Hey Banega, the main reason really was she is 23 hasnt been single since she was 15 one relationship after another while me I have always been single and she was my first real relationship Im 27 and have been abit of a player till I got with her, maybe just the timing of us was off or maybe we aint meant to be, the main reason of the hurt is we were best friends for 4years before we got together and now we hardly talk, I dont see the light bar trying not to talk to her I wish we could be close like we were before its hard but I'd be lying to myself if we were basically friends at the moment as I don't think Im ready as I still have feelings for her!
Billie The Puppet Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 Hey Banega, the main reason really was she is 23 hasnt been single since she was 15 one relationship after another while me I have always been single and she was my first real relationship Im 27 and have been abit of a player till I got with her, maybe just the timing of us was off or maybe we aint meant to be, the main reason of the hurt is we were best friends for 4years before we got together and now we hardly talk, I dont see the light bar trying not to talk to her I wish we could be close like we were before its hard but I'd be lying to myself if we were basically friends at the moment as I don't think Im ready as I still have feelings for her! Fab I got the exact same story, However I go back to when we got together and she was pursuing me and was all over me, She wanted engagement back then but I thought it was too fast and just when I was ready she pulls the I just need to be independent, need to be single etc. (I found a fishy email that say's otherwise) However to my knowledge she actually hasn't acted on anything and is remaining single but I have been going 17 days now with NC and haven't been able to keep tabs on if she has been with another. I don't buy the I need to be single excuse to be honest. (My ex is 26 and hasn't been single since she was 14)
Author fabio10 Posted September 22, 2010 Author Posted September 22, 2010 Im sorry to hear that billie, I know you might not believe it and if you found a email your more than likely correct as for me one of my best mates is her flatmate so Im pretty sure but hey the day down the road will come eventually when she finds someone it might be years or months but I dont begrudge her that I want her to be happy but I just cant be her friend right now, we have both moved houses in the last few weeks to even try get some distance from eachother for our mutual friends its very amusing it is pain to see eachother for both of us . Infact I think it will be good for her to meet some other men but I wont wait and she knows that but right now Im better on my own my dad is ill, Im starting a new job soon my life is influx and I think it will be a long time before Im ready for another lady but this is my chance to improve myself gym going,travelling and partying
Gdunkman Posted September 26, 2010 Posted September 26, 2010 Hey Fabio! I'm not a big expert myself to, actually it's my first try to give a piece of advice our situations are so similar, just found another match - my ex was my first real love and first long time relations just like in your case. I'd try to guess why you did that on the basis of my own emotions. You have already understood you won't be together, you are making your own plans in your life and you are healing, but you, just like me, haven't understood why breakup has happened, why she changed her mind with no sagnificant reasons, that makes you angry. How to cope with that? Perhaps wait, in time your emotions will turn to some other objects and it will be the other story.
Author fabio10 Posted September 26, 2010 Author Posted September 26, 2010 Hey Gman, yes Im healing it aint an easy thing but you start to see progress over time, Don Ho was great to me, I was stubborn and a fool in the days following my breakup but he got through to me eventually . I get what your saying sometimes I feel Im going through what most people go through in their teenage years (losing their first love) but for me it didnt happen till now at the age of 27 partly because it takes alot for me to fall for someone but I fell like a rock down a mountain for this one. Im getting better day by day but last week when I saw her in my house it sent me reeling thats why no contact is so important Im really not ready to see her in person obivously when I said those things to her so Im best to spend time with my new love WEIGHTS AND LOOKING IN THE MIRROR
Don Ho Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 You got it right Bro, the gym will never let you down!
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