WowReally Posted September 17, 2010 Posted September 17, 2010 So Im feeling pretty good that I've gone a week without talking to the xMM - isnt it the first week that they say is the hardest? At least that's been my experience with addictions and trying to quit them. Im not saying it's been an easy week (far from it) but Im glad I haven't broken down. At any rate I know he's going to be stopping by my place of work for a business purposes next week and Im not sure how Im going to handle it. Part of me hopes they keep him in the front conference room so I wont run the risk of seeing him at all and part of me would love to sneak a peak....kind of like a smoker who just needs to be around the smoke to get through another day of not actually smoking. I know he still has a soft spot for me as he did me a favor without batting an eyelash (business related). He actually owes me as I am the one who got him into my company playing the squeaky wheel around my office. Im also responsible for getting him in for next week but if he never figures that part out Im ok with that. I dont know, Im probably playing this whole thing up in my head due to nerves and going through withdrawl. Oy. Drama! Hate it!
Author WowReally Posted September 18, 2010 Author Posted September 18, 2010 So I think I willed a brief run in with him, if you can even call it that. I passed him as he was coming out of a parking lot...I think he gave me a slight wave and I just kind of stared back as I "flew" by. It was weird. then I sent him a quick text with a compliment and told him to enjoy the day - he didnt respond...I guess it's just as well. Moving on
Star_Bright Posted September 19, 2010 Posted September 19, 2010 I think he's doing you a favor by not initiating or responding to contact. It doesn't feel like it now, I'm sure, but it will be a lot easier in the long run for you if you cut all ties now, and it seems like he's helping you/ forcing you to do that.
Author WowReally Posted September 19, 2010 Author Posted September 19, 2010 (edited) No I know and I know it's for the best Im sure his visit next week to my work for business will not effect me in anyway...Im sure I wont even know he's there which is fine by me! I was listening to my Ipod today and kept playing "It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday" by Boys II Men...very fitting. Edited September 19, 2010 by WowReally
Star_Bright Posted September 19, 2010 Posted September 19, 2010 Awww come on, it's going to affect you, it certainly would me! So just be prepared for that and stay strong. Hugs to you girl!
Author WowReally Posted September 20, 2010 Author Posted September 20, 2010 No what I meant was that Im thinking he will avoid my area or he'll do a "drive by" either way I'd rather NOT know. Ignorance is bliss in this scenario. It's now been over a week and I still get emotional even though I KNOW I have to move on. It's for the best - that has become my mantra! It's for the best!
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