2nd Marriage - Never Thought I'd be Here

[Robbed]

Hi all,

 

I've been separated from my spouse of over ten years now, for a week and a half. She didn't think I would leave, but she's not saying she wants me back either. We've been through much over the years, first getting to know each other for over 3 years before we made it to the wedding isle. Never knew much of her, she knew of me ...but it was refreshing finding someone who was an admirer. Anyway without going through all of the story, and after much unrest, no affairs on my part/sexual infidelity, the facebook stuff got to be too much, constantly on the iPhone and being very secretive with things and people. Daughter raised the best we could, got pregnant over a month ago, i wasn't ready for this. Step son, lazy, A.D.D., but a pretty good kid (not sure what he's done)...but with the wife and I, constant non-communication, no affection, no sex, no nothing. I get all the blame, stomach upset, possible ulcers. I'm in counseling, tired, feeling horrible about so much, I've had my share of doing and saying stupid things to her, unchristian-like, lost so many friends, she thinks I'm bi-polar and with mental problems. I don't know what to do, feel so rejected, like I feel my immediate family has been with her because of so many stupid things she's done. Tried my best in helping her raise our step daughter, seems like nothing stuck, now this. I'm ready to divorce, but I don't even know that she wants me. I feel stupid. At the end of my wits. Staying in a hotel now, at least it's peaceful.

[You Go Girl]

Hi all,

 

I've been separated from my spouse of over ten years now, for a week and a half. She didn't think I would leave, but she's not saying she wants me back either. We've been through much over the years, first getting to know each other for over 3 years before we made it to the wedding isle. Never knew much of her, she knew of me ...but it was refreshing finding someone who was an admirer. Anyway without going through all of the story, and after much unrest, no affairs on my part/sexual infidelity, the facebook stuff got to be too much, constantly on the iPhone and being very secretive with things and people. Daughter raised the best we could, got pregnant over a month ago, i wasn't ready for this. Step son, lazy, A.D.D., but a pretty good kid (not sure what he's done)...but with the wife and I, constant non-communication, no affection, no sex, no nothing. I get all the blame, stomach upset, possible ulcers. I'm in counseling, tired, feeling horrible about so much, I've had my share of doing and saying stupid things to her, unchristian-like, lost so many friends, she thinks I'm bi-polar and with mental problems. I don't know what to do, feel so rejected, like I feel my immediate family has been with her because of so many stupid things she's done. Tried my best in helping her raise our step daughter, seems like nothing stuck, now this. I'm ready to divorce, but I don't even know that she wants me. I feel stupid. At the end of my wits. Staying in a hotel now, at least it's peaceful.

 

Woah Nelly! Slow down and explain yourself. I understand this is a stressful time, but complete strangers can't offer any help if they can't understand what is going on.

First off--who's secretive with facebook?

Your wife is a month pregnant?

Not sure what step-son has done...what?

Why did you lose your friends?

Have you been assessed for manic-depression?

How has your immediate family been with her because of stupid things you have done? Who are the people you are referring here to as immediate family?

Fill in the blanks please...it's difficult to understand what is going on. Thanks.

[Robbed]

I apologize "you go girl," I was very frustrated when I posted this last week. To clarify, my wife is the one who is secretive on facebook. I just wonder why? My step daughter is pregnant at 19. The step son is simply A.D.D.,but I'm not sure how quickly he will progress with things in life. I've lost lots of friends, because of being so isolated but not because I don't want to be social. No, I have not been diagnosed for manic depression, I'm not manic depressive. My immediate family I refer to as my (mom, dad and younger sibling).

 

Hope this clears things up a bit more. As a matter of fact I might come back and clarify , but I just felt like posting a week ago. I was a wreck emotionally. I'm much better today. Again, sorry for the muddy post.

[BB07]

Robbed........what's the deal? I looked at your older posts and you sure weren't posting like a married man in them. Various posts talking about several different girls that you had the hots for. Have you always behaved like a single guy during your marriage?

[LittleTiger]

Robbed........what's the deal? I looked at your older posts and you sure weren't posting like a married man in them. Various posts talking about several different girls that you had the hots for. Have you always behaved like a single guy during your marriage?

 

Just read some of his previous posts myself - something doesn't quite add up here!

 

Robbed -care to enlighten us?

[Robbed]

Robbed........what's the deal? I looked at your older posts and you sure weren't posting like a married man in them. Various posts talking about several different girls that you had the hots for. Have you always behaved like a single guy during your marriage?

 

Boo ya! No...guys I'm not married, but I haven't posted here in so long that a bored single man can't even get a reply until he sounds contradictory, right?

Interesting! You guys are like a moth to a flame. Nothing's changed since the girl that I really was crazy about decided that she would get married WITHOUT telling me! And guess what? I just had a birthday last month, and low and behold...guess who emailed me with... "Happy Birthday Friend --- long time no see ---- ." So you tell me guys...why should I respond to her at all? Right?

Gezzzzz. And guess what? I didn't. Am I still a little sore about this? Yeah. I don't even want to see her, so I've blocked all emails from her, and I certainly haven't been on her side of the facility, hurts still.

 

My apologies...for the earlier post.

 

So BB07, you're actually keeping up with me? Wow, I'm impressed.

[FanFan]

Hi all,

 

I've been separated from my spouse of over ten years now, for a week and a half. She didn't think I would leave, but she's not saying she wants me back either. We've been through much over the years, first getting to know each other for over 3 years before we made it to the wedding isle. Never knew much of her, she knew of me ...but it was refreshing finding someone who was an admirer. Anyway without going through all of the story, and after much unrest, no affairs on my part/sexual infidelity, the facebook stuff got to be too much, constantly on the iPhone and being very secretive with things and people. Daughter raised the best we could, got pregnant over a month ago, i wasn't ready for this. Step son, lazy, A.D.D., but a pretty good kid (not sure what he's done)...but with the wife and I, constant non-communication, no affection, no sex, no nothing. I get all the blame, stomach upset, possible ulcers. I'm in counseling, tired, feeling horrible about so much, I've had my share of doing and saying stupid things to her, unchristian-like, lost so many friends, she thinks I'm bi-polar and with mental problems. I don't know what to do, feel so rejected, like I feel my immediate family has been with her because of so many stupid things she's done. Tried my best in helping her raise our step daughter, seems like nothing stuck, now this. I'm ready to divorce, but I don't even know that she wants me. I feel stupid. At the end of my wits. Staying in a hotel now, at least it's peaceful.

 

How can anyone argue or disagree with her on that.

[Robbed]

so what are you trying to say fan-fan?

[FanFan]

so what are you trying to say fan-fan?

 

You know exactly what I am talking about.