mea Posted September 15, 2010 Posted September 15, 2010 I haven't posted much on the LS shack but I can honestly say reading everyone else's posts has been a huge help. So an update on where I am at. I am now 5months post the breakup of my 8 year relationship and up untill now it had been a real struggle, I was still wishing we would get back together, pouring over every detail of how I wish I had done things differently and generally feeling crap about everything. I was really trying to look forward and move on but really was struggling to do anything more than just getting through each day. Then recently I took two weeks off and went on holiday with a good friend. It is amazing what a change of scene does. just getting away from all the reminders (I am still living in the house where we broke up) and having new experiences to focus on. I can't say coming home wasn't hard, it did hit me and didn't quite feel like home, as home for me is where the people. But I do feel a bit lighter now, I am starting to accept it for what it is. It is something I can't change and I probably won't ever get the answers I am searching for and all I do know is that I am going to have an amazing life, even if it is just me. So thought I would just share that there is hope when you feel you are in that really black hole. I am in a better place now than I was. I know I am still not completely there, as if you asked me if I still love him the answer is still yes and I am probably doing some things that aren't helping myself. I have been NC with my ex for 3 months but still hear regularly hear from his sisters, so am not completely out of touch with his life. But NC definitely does help, it makes you focus on you!!! Mutual friends that I met through my ex have been contacting me of late and it did make so hard at first having contact with them but I do feel lucky they still value me as a friend. I am still worried about this wedding I am suppose to be going to at the end of the year that my ex will be at and I don't know whether to go or not. What to do on his birthday etc but I will cross those bridges when I come to them. So I posted a while back the question does time help? The answer to my question is yes it does I just hope I can keep looking forward. The plan next is to get a new job and place to live.
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