cb9343 Posted September 20, 2010 Posted September 20, 2010 I am just ready to be at a strong point for myself and my son.. i dont want this pain anymore its not fair to me. i am going through the same thing and i want to be healed i i want to get over him.. this is my third time in 2 years. he walks away casue i am needy and i get stronger and he comes back... he know is going to bootcamp for 6 months and says he cant handle me right now.. i agreed with him and he was suprised by that i then i got off the phone.. i just want the pain to go away and for him to fix his running and me to get stronger in the process. who knows if he will come back..
lightning Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 cb, seriously relax. I know it's so hard in those initial stages. Don't get me wrong I still am consumed by my situation but the space we've had in the last 6 weeks has made things SO clear. I know what I want and don't want and whether we get back together or not my next relationship is going to benefit from this time apart. He will come back - They always do. It might be too late but if that's the case, his loss for not realising what he had faster. Step back and think about the things in the relationship that weren't right and try and think about how you would handle that issue in the future... From having some space I have realised I push him away by trying to get him to talk about what he's going through before he's ready. That's when he runs because he feels pressured to deal with things before he's ready. He always comes around and tells me in his own time so I now know from this soace I need to relax. Also my boy also hates drama and bitching and bagging people which I never used to do but have realised I have become a bit negative the last 6 months. I've put an end to that right now. My early new years resolution is to not put people down. Get me? Try and think about the things that will make you a better person. Do some fun things with your son and keep busy. Trust me it'll get easier. Oxo, how's your situation going?
cb9343 Posted September 21, 2010 Posted September 21, 2010 cb, seriously relax. I know it's so hard in those initial stages. Don't get me wrong I still am consumed by my situation but the space we've had in the last 6 weeks has made things SO clear. I know what I want and don't want and whether we get back together or not my next relationship is going to benefit from this time apart. He will come back - They always do. It might be too late but if that's the case, his loss for not realising what he had faster. Step back and think about the things in the relationship that weren't right and try and think about how you would handle that issue in the future... From having some space I have realised I push him away by trying to get him to talk about what he's going through before he's ready. That's when he runs because he feels pressured to deal with things before he's ready. He always comes around and tells me in his own time so I now know from this soace I need to relax. Also my boy also hates drama and bitching and bagging people which I never used to do but have realised I have become a bit negative the last 6 months. I've put an end to that right now. My early new years resolution is to not put people down. Get me? Try and think about the things that will make you a better person. Do some fun things with your son and keep busy. Trust me it'll get easier. Oxo, how's your situation going? Thanks it only happen yesterday so i just am emotional.. i just feel like i was at a good place before and i asked him not to run again if things got tough and he did. My mom thinks he is doing it cause he is stressed about leaving and he is 32. I know there is a light somewhere just feelin down and wish i could change some things i did but i guess things happen for a reason... i know i deserve the best i just wish it was him we had an amazing relationship!!
Caradavine Posted September 22, 2010 Posted September 22, 2010 It's about people not handling intensive relationships and it's not just a man thing, loads of threads from guys on here who are very clingy, insecure and emotionally vulnerable. So you don't have to be PC, just be fair !... the reason men have become emasculated is down to them hearing women make comments like yours ! Um, no? I will think and feel and say what I want, and I really don't care what you think. I'm sorry, is this not the breaking up forum? Is it not expected that people will be jaded, have negative opinions of the opposite sex, and so forth? So, although you are right that not all men are jackarses, I still say my own statements from myself. I have never emasculated a man, although I might enjoy the experience from my current mindset.
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