Your suggestions

[naeromagus]

Okay, well my girlfriend of 13 months has recently broken up with me. To start off with i am 25 and she is recently 22. We always had a super close relationship.I am the best boyfriend she has ever had i treat her so well, i am just perfect for her, she could not ask for more she told me. Well basically she told me that she is not ready to commit in fear of hurting me which she said she knows she might do. For about 3 weeks before the breakup she was going out quite often with her girlfriend from work drinking. She said that she knew she was hurting me by doing this, it made her feel so bad, that she couldn't stand it. Now i am the kinda guy that lets my girl go out and have a good time with whatever, i am not controlling in anyway shape of form, That is one Feature she said that she has always really liked about me.

She told me that the week prior to the break-up she couldn't hardly eat and it was making her sick to her stomach. Over her feeling so bad that she knew i might be at home waiting for her to show up, which sometimes she would text me at the end of the night telling me she would see me the next day because she was too drunk to drive ( I'm sure glad she did that, Because a couple of times she did come see me and she was really drunk i told her i wasn't too pleased with her decision). So that's why this had to happen, Her and i have some much trust for each other, I am sure that she would not lie to me, as i wouldn't to her, She said i am perfect for her, as all her friends do and parents and everyone close to her does. She Told me that she love's me and does want to get back together, but just doesn't want to promise this just in case something does happen and she does not want me to hate her, but just needs some time to do things on her own for awhile. She told me she could see herself being with me for a really long time, I have been her longest relationship and her first true love. she told me that one of her previous ex's she thought was her first until she met me and fell in True love with me, she does not want to be committed for right now, because i for one was single when i was that age i understand her point, She told me that i am one of the most important people in her life right now besides her 2 best Friends, and does not want to lose me and stay Really good friends for now, She told me she still wants to see me and hang out ,she just wants to get things out of her system before she totally commits to me. So That in the future she does not look back and have any regrets of not being able to go and do something that she wanted to do with risk of hurting me. I asked her if she has another Guy that she is interested in and also did she Cheat/mess up one of the nights she went out drinking, She told me no she did not cheat on me or has anyone else in mind. I know all of this was sincere coming from her because of how emotional she was crying (Bawling her eyes out) as was I. This was hard for the both of us, I for one right now don't want to go out and date yet it is too soon for me i feel. But also in hopes of getting back together, If you knew this girl you would say the same as i am, as everyone does, She is one of the sweetest girls you will ever meet, she would never do anything intentional,she would give you her last dollar knowing that it might help you out. I know for a fact just from seeing how she reacts to random people and friends of hers that treats her like **** sometimes, she never lashes out on them or anything evil, Everybody that knows of her says the same thing she is a sweetheart! But what should i think that she wants to hang out still and i am still very important to her, and that she still loves me , should i go out and take it easy, or do you think that was her way of being nice and saying good-bye to being lovers, I was recently talking with her brother and he said he does not know why her and i broke up but that i am the first boyfriend that the family actually liked, and that she was pretty torn up over her decision she had to make seeing how she was a wreck the past couple days. He later told me that he could tell that she still has feelings for me, he lives with her that's how i found this out randomly.. while i was talking with him on another subject, She told me she thought that it would never last this long, Because of all that failed luck of her previous relations. That she thought i would just get bored of her and leave her quick,She didn't expect it to last this long. She kept on saying a couple of times though the conversation that she wished i had came into her life 2yrs from now it would be perfect. So I textd her the other day on our would have of been 14month anniversary saying, I wished everything didn't Remind me of her and that i had missed her so much that i want it back, But i know you don't want them back..(yeah can you tell i am broken over this?) She replied with : It's not that i don't want them back, and your crazy if you don't think that everything doesn't remind me of you.. But i need to do my own thing for awhile. So do you think there is still a chance, or is it wishful thinking.

Do you think this all happened because she got a bit scared how serious we both were getting since this is her First Relationship that lasted more than 5 months ? I am going to let her do her own thing to show her that i care about her. And Hope for the Best

p.s Sorry for the poor Grammar

But thank you for your reply

[TaraMaiden]

She likes you, but wants to play the field, have fun, live a little, find a bit of excitement, enjoy her youth, let her hair down, branch out and be free.

 

I don't blame her.

She's waaaaaaay too young to be thinking of a 'Mr Forever Yours' guy.

I think she's absolutely right to be doing this. you need to break off contact with her, because otherwise, you may well become her back-burner buddy, and soft place to fall. Which actually, gives you no hope at all, it just ensures you'll get used for what she can get from you, until Mr Right comes along.

 

I'd do likewise.

I advise you to play the field, have fun, live a little, find a bit of excitement, enjoy your youth, let your hair down, branch out and be free.

 

It's the only way you'll find yourself, because this way, you're just setting yourself up for more heartbreak.

[fabio10]

Man totally understand your situation same as mine if you care to read my posts/story my girl was also 22 and basically desired the same thing as yours, I was the same as you down in the dumps wrapped her up in cotton wool would not say a bad word about her etc, and tried to be there for her.

 

But as time went on I became sick of it, we ended up arguing etc and when she thought I was moving on she got mad and upset so man cut contact it will do you the world of good in the long-run, stop thinking about getting back together you know she has told you it could be years before she is ready alot can happen in that time !!!!

[naeromagus]

Thanks for the support guys, Hmmm... i just miss those days where i would find her sleeping next to me and open her big green eyes and say to me that she loves me.. But hmmm, i guess that's over for right now, time to go out and have some fun meet new people and live my youth before it's over. This was really hard for me because it was my first real relationship where i actually loved the girl. I am not the kinda guy that can just go out looking to get some action from another girl, i want to get to know them before that happens. She is the same way, which i respect her for. I never tell girls that i love them until i really feel it, i guess that's another thing to that bothers me is that i told her i loved her.

[fabio10]

Don't feel bad you told her you loved her she told you also ! Don't regret it you had fun didnt you and good memories to take away from it, I know you miss her , and it aint easy ! But whats for you wont pass you . LIVE MY MAN ONE LIFE ONE CHANCE

[flyguy23]

I am in the same boat man. It is so hard to go from being basically bestfriends and sleeping together every night and talking all day long to not talking at all. I don't even know my ex anymore, that is the part I am struggling with right now. I am only a few days into NC I hope it gets better. Good luck to you.

[naeromagus]

yeah.. the sad thing also is i got 2 tickets to lisa lampanelli, for our would have been 14 month anniversary one of her favorite comedians, i got them in the mail today, so i texted her asking if she wanted to go and that it wasn't a plot to try and get her back and i know that she wants to do her own thing for awhile and that i respect that, i just wanted to go strictly as friends, she replied ( Hmm i'm not suree.. I still think that's too soon).. Now keep in mind she broke it off with me the 31st of august, and the show is next fri the 18th, I Told her sorry i broke the N.C rule, she didn't know what that meant so i told her what it meant and told her have a good day , she wrote back ( Oh i just think some space will do us good) and told me to have a good day also. But i just found out tonight that i can't go now because i just started a new job and they won't let me have the night off for that, so i was thinking just to stop by her house and give them to her mother for her and her mom to go. since they both like the comedian, instead of having them go to waste do you think that will be okay or kinda weird , Also help me with this while we were texting back and fourth the one day i said to her,(this is bad i wish i didn't do this)On a lighter note if you ever feel like being a bad girl one of these nights you can call me No Strings attached.(Drunken text yikes!) she isn't that kinda girl but i figured maybe after a couple of months it might be okay (since we were once a couple), Actually all i want is for her to sleep next to me One more night.. I don't care if we have sex, But anyway her reply was ( you could say no strings but it won't matter.. that's the way it's going to be.. It's Inevitable) i now look back and really wish i didn't say that to her, Because she isn't a slut by any means. Kinda personal but it was 3 1/2 months before we did the deed.. i said back to her after that (Haha i figured i would give it a shot) she wrote back (Haha Good try_).. i don't want to bring it up again but i would like to say sorry to her for that uncalled for remark .. man oh man what do you think that meant her reply? no she won't because she knows it will bring feelings back or if it did happen there is no chance of feelings, i dunno sex for me was always something i did to show her that i loved her and yeah it is fun, but she once told me upon me asking what she thought of it, she told me it was just fun something to do.. or she will never have sex with me again until maybe getting back together in the far future if I'm available when she is ready for a committed relationship. Thanks Hmmmm I'm an idiot

[naeromagus]

Well, the other day(Tues) i texted her asking her not to throw away my guitar and some things i left at her house and whenever she was ready to say hi to me again. She replied " I wouldn't throw them out and i'll let you know when, unless you want them sooner. So anyway Thurs She Texted me, asking if i was up for breakfast on sat or Sunday, i got back to her and said sat is fine with me. So we meet up ate,chatted, Talked about how things in our lives were going. HaHa after not seeing her for close to 3wks it seemed like a lifetime. As we were about to leave breakfast i asked her if she was up for going to the Local Dirtmall (Indoor Flea Market). She said sure as both of us didn't have work till a bit later on in the day, So we walked around the flea market it was like old times and such, Laughing,Showing each other different things we were interested in. So when we got back outside we decided to have a smoke and go for a short walk around the outside since it was a Beautiful day outside. She brought some of my things with her to give back to me, and i said to her i had her favorite Tye-Dye shirt of hers. She was like oh yeah i forgot about that and told me Yeah i let you wear it the one night. But anyway she asked if i would be up for going for a walk later on at night with her and have a bit of drinks. So we meet up at my house Drank a lil bit, Showed each other songs that we liked, Until she put on the song by Oasis "Wonder Wall" She instantly Broke down, And ran to my bathroom. I went there A couple mins later to try and comfort her as it made me feel so terrible, I certainly didn't want to see my Baby Cry like that.. So anyway she came out of there and I suggested that right then would be a good time for a walk. So we did that strolled around town and such, Came back to my house and sat on the porch steps and we shared a bit of my Hurricane 40, She broke down again and ran away, I went to find her and held out my hand for her to grab picked her up and held her telling her " Please Don't Cry Baby girl, We can still be friends.. She then asked me Why i still treat her well after what she did to me. I told her because i care for her i can't be like that i understand that she needed her space and that i wanted to give it to her. So we went inside my house and proceeded up to my room to watch a movie together.. When inside popped on the movie and once again she broke down ran out for the bathroom. She came back in i hugged her saying don't cry i understand what you want and i want to give it to you. I just want to be friends with you. As she was still crying i asked her what was the matter she wouldn't tell me at first.. Then she finally said that she made a Terrible mistake, She wanted to be back with me " I'm perfect for her" And that she missed me so much. I looked Strait into her eyes and asked her if she was certain if this is what she really wants, Shook her head yes. Then she just grabbed me for a hug and told me that she Loved me so much, I told her that i love her also... So were back together, I apologized to her for holding out so long to tell her that i loved her (I held out for a year,even though i did feel it i just didn't say it.) I feel as though the love word is just thrown around these days without any meaning what so ever, that word means so much to me. She was like you bastard I wanted to hear you say it for so long. She Told me that earlier during the day it was so hard for her that all she wanted to do was hug and kiss me, And the thought of us just being friends killed her. And that her time away from me was horrible she thought that is what she wanted,She couldn't stop thinking about me and everything reminded her of me, She told me she just got scared and ran like she always does, She never had a boyfriend/Best friend as me. I love her so much i have never meet a girl like her, She just makes me melt. So this is what love feels like. Its such a great feeling. Thanks Ls for your Support

Brandon

[lvixen]

Wall of text, much? We need paragraphs!