Dobby05 Posted September 7, 2010 Posted September 7, 2010 Basically, I found myself waking up in my managers bed...having realised I hadnt actually done anything the night before despite his efforts to get me into bed, I left that morning feeling thoroughly awkward... Work the next day wasnt too bad, apart from an 'alright?' 'yup you?' awkward conversation. We had txt previously the night before agreeing that it was a mess up but nothing happened. So why cant I stop thinking about it? Or him? And why am I constantly looking at my phone wondering why he hasnt text or why I am not texting him now. At the end of the day, I agreed to back to his that night after many many drinks on the basis nothing happened. True to my word nothing happened but am i regretting not sleeping with him? Can anyone explain what I am feeling and what I should do? Do I contact him? Or just leave it?
jj33 Posted September 7, 2010 Posted September 7, 2010 You are feeling used. He came onto you, you succumbed to going back to his house and now nothing. Its not a nice feeling. You have a bf (or so you said in your last thread) You are leaving the job in 2 weeks. Let it go. Chalk it up to experience and dont do it again. Look at your drinking. Its a problem if you regularly get so drunk that you can find yourself in that situation. Some people can handle lots of drinks some cant. Dont be the last left alone with someone unless you know before you leave whether you are planning to go home with them. And DONT go "back to his" or invite someone to yours if you havent started the evening on a a date together and dont plan on sleeping with them. Most men arent interested in pajama parties with attractive young women. Sorry you found yourself in this situation but most people do at one point or another. Chalk it up to experience.
Ellin Posted September 7, 2010 Posted September 7, 2010 If nothing happened despite his best efforts then he feels like a failure and doesn't want to risk feeling like this again. Regarding your feelings - only you know what they really are, just try to feel them in a quiet moment and figure out what they are. What should you do? Whatever you want to do - but in a clever way, which won't cause anyone any trouble. Take care.
jj33 Posted September 7, 2010 Posted September 7, 2010 Ellin did you read her earlier post. SHe has a bf who she is planning to move in with and this guy basically sexually harrassed her (unless we have a troll...)
fooled once Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 Basically, I found myself waking up in my managers bed...having realised I hadnt actually done anything the night before despite his efforts to get me into bed, I left that morning feeling thoroughly awkward... Work the next day wasnt too bad, apart from an 'alright?' 'yup you?' awkward conversation. We had txt previously the night before agreeing that it was a mess up but nothing happened. So why cant I stop thinking about it? Or him? And why am I constantly looking at my phone wondering why he hasnt text or why I am not texting him now. At the end of the day, I agreed to back to his that night after many many drinks on the basis nothing happened. True to my word nothing happened but am i regretting not sleeping with him? Can anyone explain what I am feeling and what I should do? Do I contact him? Or just leave it? why do I get the feeling that you really DID want something to happen? I read your other post, and while you seemed upset that you allowed yourself to get so drunk that you went home with a manager from work, now you seem as if you wish something DID happen because you are attracted to this guy. I don't think filing a sexual harassment claim will do much; as you both were off work at the time. Additionally, he hasn't harassed you at work....but it seems like from what you have posted that you wish he would contact you, flirt with you...something. Is this the first time you have done something like this? You are totally right. I was too drunk, I shouldnt have drank so much and I should have taken a stand more. I only have two weeks left at the workplace before I go back to university, so I just need to keep my head down, do my job and leave without any of this being mentioned...i hope. In terms of my boyfriend, its made me realise how much of an idiot I've been and just how much people take other people for granted. I dont think I will say anything unless he asks obviously, but Ive realied I did a very stupid think and need to open my eyes a bit more to what I have got infront of me! Cheers x
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