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How does your EX stop valuing your relationship?


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Posted
Two years........................

Horrible. I was with my ex 4 times that long. I guess it doesn't matter how long you've been with someone. Some people just don't give a sh*t and ripping your heart out is no big deal to them. They don't value you or the relationship even when you think they do. I'm still shocked that it was so easy for him to walk away from it all. He's not the same person he used to be. I feel like I don't know him anymore. It's sad to me because he was my bestfriend, my rock and my everything. Now he's dead to me.:(

Posted
OnlyTwo years, but I really fell for her hard. I won't make that mistake again. No more relationships for me

Sadly I feel the same way. I've become jaded and it's all because of this piece of sh*t bastard and what he did to me. He's got a lot of power over my happiness and I wish he didn't.

Posted

How long ago was your break up?

Posted
How long ago was your break up?

About 4 months. I just found out recently though that he cheated on me the week before he even told me he wanted to breakup. So on top of the pain of not having him in my life anymore, I know that he betrayed me. It's so very painful. I can't tell you how badly my heart is broken. I trusted him with my life and NEVER thought he would do what he did. To add insult to injury, this girl he cheated with and is now dating, is a young college girl. I've heard from a few different people that she's a piece of trash. He dumped me for THAT. Where his head is at, I will never know. A lot of it has to do with the people he is hanging out with. He's in a band and they are all a bunch of losers. He joined the band a few months before we broke up. So sadly, these losers have influenced him. It's pretty pathetic because he's a 27 year old man and losers should not be influencing his life. His little skank is a groupie, I've been told. How ridiculous. Hope she makes him happy. It's unreal to me.

Posted

four months isnt a lot of time..I hope you get through this (something tells me that you will)

Posted
four months isnt a lot of time..I hope you get through this (something tells me that you will)

Thank you. I hope you're right.

Posted

You will. You will find the right guy

Posted
You will. You will find the right guy

I hope so. It's going to take a long time, though. I'm way too hurt from all that's gone on. I hope I can trust again.

Posted
I hope so. It's going to take a long time, though. I'm way too hurt from all that's gone on. I hope I can trust again.

 

 

You will trust again. I can tell you're that kind of person

Posted
You will trust again. I can tell you're that kind of person

Hahaha how can you tell that? I'm so wounded and jaded right now, that I don't see it happening. At least not for a long, long time.

Posted
Hahaha how can you tell that? I'm so wounded and jaded right now, that I don't see it happening. At least not for a long, long time.

 

 

Cause I just know. Tell me something honestly, can you REALLY see yourself being alone for the rest of your life?

Posted
Cause I just know. Tell me something honestly, can you REALLY see yourself being alone for the rest of your life?

No, but it may be the best thing for me. I don't want this to happen to me ever again.

Posted
No, but it may be the best thing for me. I don't want this to happen to me ever again.

 

 

Trust me it's not the best thing for you. Being alone sucks. You will find the right one, nearly everyone does.

Posted
No, but it may be the best thing for me. I don't want this to happen to me ever again.

I'm 31 and yes, I still have many years ahead of me, but do I want to feel this gut wrenching, heartbreaking pain ever again. No, I do not. I've lost weight, I've lost sleep, my world is upside down, I'm on meds, I'm going to therapy and I just don't trust anymore. I would love to find a nice guy and build a life, but I just don't have the energy again for it. Especially when I know it can all be ripped out from under me in a blink of an eye. I thought I had already found that person, but I was dead wrong. I don't want to put myself out there again. I don't trust anyone anymore. Do you know what I mean?

Posted
Trust me it's not the best thing for you. Being alone sucks. You will find the right one, nearly everyone does.

I've read a lot of your posts and you have vowed never to be in a relationship now that you've been hurt, so how can you tell me I will want to do it all over again? Being alone does suck, but you don't have to worry about anyone hurting you.

Posted

Yes I know exactly what you mean. But you're not the type of person who is meant to be alone. You're gonna meet the right guy whether you want to or not. I

Posted
I've read a lot of your posts and you have vowed never to be in a relationship now that you've been hurt, so how can you tell me I will want to do it all over again? Being alone does suck, but you don't have to worry about anyone hurting you.

 

 

Because I don't value my life anymore. I dont care what happens to me. It doesn't mean I'm suicidal or anything like that. I have a good time living my life. It's just having been burned so many times I have found different things to fill my days than wasting them hoping for something that will never happen.

Posted
Yes I know exactly what you mean. But you're not the type of person who is meant to be alone. You're gonna meet the right guy whether you want to or not. I

Well I won't be searching for anyone, I can tell you that. If it happens, it happens, I guess. Whoever comes along will have his work cut out for him.

Posted
I'm 31 and yes, I still have many years ahead of me, but do I want to feel this gut wrenching, heartbreaking pain ever again. No, I do not. I've lost weight, I've lost sleep, my world is upside down, I'm on meds, I'm going to therapy and I just don't trust anymore. I would love to find a nice guy and build a life, but I just don't have the energy again for it. Especially when I know it can all be ripped out from under me in a blink of an eye. I thought I had already found that person, but I was dead wrong. I don't want to put myself out there again. I don't trust anyone anymore. Do you know what I mean?

 

 

I'm in therapy and on meds too, (for different reasons), but he is out there waiting for you. I know it. Dont give up on yourself

Posted
Because I don't value my life anymore. I dont care what happens to me. It doesn't mean I'm suicidal or anything like that. I have a good time living my life. It's just having been burned so many times I have found different things to fill my days than wasting them hoping for something that will never happen.

It may happen, you just never know. And will you be open to it? I hope so. Your life does have value. You have a good time living your life, which is awesome. So that right there is a valuable life. I've been burned many times before too and I thought this last one was it. I was so sure of it. Now I know that he wasn't "it" and I don't want to do this all over again. The next one will come along and I'll think he's "it" and the rug will be ripped out from under me yet again. No thanks

Posted
It may happen, you just never know. And will you be open to it? I hope so. Your life does have value. You have a good time living your life, which is awesome. So that right there is a valuable life. I've been burned many times before too and I thought this last one was it. I was so sure of it. Now I know that he wasn't "it" and I don't want to do this all over again. The next one will come along and I'll think he's "it" and the rug will be ripped out from under me yet again. No thanks

 

 

I'm telling you it's not in the cards for you to be alone. And you won't be.

Posted
I'm telling you it's not in the cards for you to be alone. And you won't be.

I'll take your word for it, I guess. Are you a clairvoyant?:p

Posted
I'll take your word for it, I guess. Are you a clairvoyant?:p

 

Good shot:D!

 

No, I'm not. But I can tell you hate being alone, and you don't deserve to be. The man of your dreams is out there waiting for you. Give yourself a chance to heal up a bit and then go find him. He will be there.

Posted
Good shot:D!

 

No, I'm not. But I can tell you hate being alone, and you don't deserve to be. The man of your dreams is out there waiting for you. Give yourself a chance to heal up a bit and then go find him. He will be there.

Thank you for the encouraging words. I suppose I'll have to keep you posted.:cool:

Posted

Some people just don't value the same things other's do. I know after my XH and I separated, I lingered SO MUCH on those memories, not able to comprehend why he didn't...like, 'if only he could remember these things I do, he'd come running back'. Once someone's mind has been made up about ending a relationship, even where cheating isn't involved, their minds have already tucked away those memories. You'd be a fool to not think that @ some point in their day something reminds them about you or a memory you've shared, but, its just not enough for them to come running back or stop what they're doing to make things right.

 

I'm in the same boat; having a hard time comprehending how my current ex could just seemingly forget the relationship...its gotten better over the last little while, but it still hurts. I knew tho that he checked out mentally a few months before we broke up, so his mind had already sorta forgot all those good times, or they just weren't enough to keep him around. IDK if he was messing around w anyone else (I wouldn't be surprised), but regardless, he just does not think about things how I do. I hate knowing it, but I also know that that's just how people can be. Kinda like, been there, done that. I can't control it...I canjust TRY and control how much energy I put into remembering things myself.

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