How does your EX stop valuing your relationship?

[harkkam]

If you gave somebody your all and you loved them very much, and they loved you back, but you guys would fight at times but always make up. Why would there come a time, when one person just says "Forget this I cant take it anymore" and just let go off all the wonderful things that you shared together and not want to work it out with you

[ShannonMI]

If you gave somebody your all and you loved them very much, and they loved you back, but you guys would fight at times but always make up. Why would there come a time, when one person just says "Forget this I cant take it anymore" and just let go off all the wonderful things that you shared together and not want to work it out with you

I've often wondered this myself. How do you give up a good relationship so f*cking easily.

With my situation, my ex and I NEVER fought. I'm not just saying this either. We literally never fought. Everything was good as far as I knew. Then out of the blue he tells me he's changed and that we aren't right for each other. In reality he cheated on me for about a week before he told me anything was up (I found this out months later). He thought he had found a better partner apparently. A college girl who is a reported skank by people that know her. So he dumped me, a woman he had an 8 year relationship with, to be with a young kid. I hope it blows up in his face. It boggles my mind how our relationship was so disposable. One day everything is going good and the next day they throw you out like you are a bag of trash. I don't understand it and I never will.

[Iselia]

From my experience, it is because your ex has found someone new.

[ShannonMI]

1) Because they found someone to replace you

2) Because they are evil

So fu*king true. #2 especially

[ShannonMI]

From my experience, it is because your ex has found someone new.

And is the grass over there greener?? Is this new person as good as you? Probably not. When do they realize it? Do they ever realize it?

[Iselia]

And is the grass over there greener?? Is this new person as good as you? Probably not. When do they realize it? Do they ever realize it?

 

Well, as of right now, she thinks the grass is greener. Last I heard she is partying her butt off and is pretty much a whore and druggie. So... I guess so? We're about 5 months broken up. If anything happens I'll let LS know... I kind of doubt she's going to come around anytime soon, or ever.

 

As for that other my ex's crush. Her crush reject my ex at first, but I think they're beginning to start something now. So, it hurts.

Edited September 6, 2010 by Iselia
Elaborate

[ShannonMI]

Well, as of right now, she thinks the grass is greener. Last I heard she is partying her butt off and is pretty much a whore and druggie. So... I guess so? We're about 5 months broken up. If anything happens I'll let LS know... I kind of doubt she's going to come around anytime soon, or ever.

Sounds like she's drowning her sorrows with booze, drugs and sex. Doesn't want to face what she did to you. My ex is in a band (he joined a few months before we broke up) and I've heard all he does is go out and party and he's dating a groupie. Have a great life a**hole.

[Iselia]

Sounds like she's drowning her sorrows with booze, drugs and sex. Doesn't want to face what she did to you. My ex is in a band (he joined a few months before we broke up) and I've heard all he does is go out and party and he's dating a groupie. Have a great life a**hole.

 

She broke up with me partly because I didn't want her doing drugs and drinking. I would get really upset over her new party habits and I felt like she was ignoring me to a degree.

 

I doubt she's drowning her sorrows; I think this is just the lifestyle she wants at the moment. She just went off to college about a month ago. She kept telling me how college is going to be a brand new life for her with new experiences. Basically, she is just another sorority girl. It makes me sad.

 

I'm actually beginning to think she might actually be bipolar. There is nothing I can do for her now, though.

[Red leaves]

With my situation, my ex and I NEVER fought. I'm not just saying this either. We literally never fought.

 

Then he must have stored his frustration inside him. There must be a reason for what he did.

[ShannonMI]

She broke up with me partly because I didn't want her doing drugs and drinking. I would get really upset over her new party habits and I felt like she was ignoring me to a degree.

 

I doubt she's drowning her sorrows; I think this is just the lifestyle she wants at the moment. She just went off to college about a month ago. She kept telling me how college is going to be a brand new life for her with new experiences. Basically, she is just another sorority girl. It makes me sad.

 

I'm actually beginning to think she might actually be bipolar. There is nothing I can do for her now, though.

Yea people who are bipolar abuse drugs and alcohol a lot of times because they can't deal with the extreme highs and lows of the illness. It is sad when they choose a certain destructive life over a happy life with you. I feel my ex did that with me. We had a happy life. At least I thought we did. He never gave any indication he was unhappy and he threw it away to party and hang with the band. The band are a bunch of losers who drink, smoke weed and don't have jobs. It's like my ex is living his college years again. He's 27. We started dating when he was 19, so maybe he feels like he never got to experience those crazy, party college years. Who knows. It seems so stupid to me. Grow up already.

[ShannonMI]

Then he must have stored his frustration inside him. There must be a reason for what he did.

Yea the reason he did what he did was because he found a young college girl (7 or 8 years younger then him) that apparently could give him more then I could. We didn't fight and if he had built up frustration, it's HIS fault for not voicing it and trying to fix it, not mine. How was I to know when he never said a word and acted like everything was peachy keen? He has a case of the "grass is greener" and I hope it blows up in his face.

[Iselia]

Yea people who are bipolar abuse drugs and alcohol a lot of times because they can't deal with the extreme highs and lows of the illness. It is sad when they choose a certain destructive life over a happy life with you. I feel my ex did that with me. We had a happy life. At least I thought we did. He never gave any indication he was unhappy and he threw it away to party and hang with the band. The band are a bunch of losers who drink, smoke weed and don't have jobs. It's like my ex is living his college years again. He's 27. We started dating when he was 19, so maybe he feels like he never got to experience those crazy, party college years. Who knows. It seems so stupid to me. Grow up already.

 

My ex and I only started dating when we were 14. Very young, I know, but I feel it was a wonderful relationship that I would have kept permantely if possible. My ex has said that she felt like she never got any dumb*ss teenager years because of our relationship. I guess in a way she resents me because she had to be responsible with me and our relationship from such a young age. This probably plays into her immaturity. So I guess if an ex blames/resents you/your relationship this contributes to your ex not valuing the relationship.

[ShannonMI]

My ex and I only started dating when we were 14. Very young, I know, but I feel it was a wonderful relationship that I would have kept permantely if possible. My ex has said that she felt like she never got any dumb*ss teenager years because of our relationship. I guess in a way she resents me because she had to be responsible with me and our relationship from such a young age. This probably plays into her immaturity. So I guess if an ex blames/resents you/your relationship this contributes to your ex not valuing the relationship.

Yes so true.

[Red leaves]

We didn't fight and if he had built up frustration, it's HIS fault for not voicing it and trying to fix it, not mine. How was I to know when he never said a word and acted like everything was peachy keen? He has a case of the "grass is greener" and I hope it blows up in his face.

 

I am happy to agree with this because I have a similar situation with my ex-gf. She admitted though that she should have spoken out. Blamed the way she was brought up. Generally did your ex-bf take initiative in solving problems or rather hoped that they disappear by themselves?

[ShannonMI]

I am happy to agree with this because I have a similar situation with my ex-gf. She admitted though that she should have spoken out. Blamed the way she was brought up. Generally did your ex-bf take initiative in solving problems or rather hoped that they disappear by themselves?

I guess if we did have disagreements, he would voice what was bothering him, but it was never anything major. He didn't give me any indication he was unhappy. When he told me he wanted to break up, I was completely blindsided. It came out of the clear blue sky.

[ShannonMI]

I am happy to agree with this because I have a similar situation with my ex-gf. She admitted though that she should have spoken out. Blamed the way she was brought up. Generally did your ex-bf take initiative in solving problems or rather hoped that they disappear by themselves?

The only indication I got was a week before he dropped the bomb. He was going out drinking a lot and some nights he didn't come home. He told me he'd gotten too drunk and stayed at a friend's house . I believed him of course because I had no reason not to. Now I've learned that week he was drinking and not coming home, he was seeing this college girl. So he dumped me for her. It's painful and shocking to say the least.

[skydiveaddict]

If you gave somebody your all and you loved them very much, and they loved you back, but you guys would fight at times but always make up. Why would there come a time, when one person just says "Forget this I cant take it anymore" and just let go off all the wonderful things that you shared together and not want to work it out with you

 

 

 

I dont know, I never got a chance to ask those questions

[ShannonMI]

I dont know, I never got a chance to ask those questions

Does it drive you crazy that you don't know the answers or have you just let it go?

[ShannonMI]

And did my ex value our 8 year relationship? HELL NO!! That's what kills me everyday.

[skydiveaddict]

Does it drive you crazy that you don't know the answers or have you just let it go?

 

Yes, it still bothers me, (not having any answers), but when I got back from the war, I was already a mess. Her disappearing just made it worse. I am still in the process of letting it go

[skydiveaddict]

And did my ex value our 8 year relationship? HELL NO!! That's what kills me everyday.

 

 

I can understand your feelings, I feel the same way

[ShannonMI]

Yes, it still bothers me, (not having any answers), but when I got back from the war, I was already a mess. Her disappearing just made it worse. I am still in the process of letting it go

She dumped you after you got back from the war? How horrible. You were in hell over there and when you came back you were in hell here as well. I'm so sorry. What were her reasons? Did she find someone else while you were gone?

[skydiveaddict]

She dumped you after you got back from the war? How horrible. You were in hell over there and when you came back you were in hell here as well. I'm so sorry. What were her reasons? Did she find someone else while you were gone?

 

 

I really don't know when she dumped me or why. ( We didn't live together). Like I said, when I got home she would not contact me in anyway. Have never heard from her since, except for a couple of texts which I didn't read

[ShannonMI]

I really don't know when she dumped me or why. ( We didn't live together). Like I said, when I got home she would not contact me in anyway. Have never heard from her since, except for a couple of texts which I didn't read

That's terrible. I'm sorry. How long did you date her?

[skydiveaddict]

That's terrible. I'm sorry. How long did you date her?

 

OnlyTwo years, but I really fell for her hard. I won't make that mistake again. No more relationships for me