BlueRidgeMTs Posted September 7, 2010 Posted September 7, 2010 For goodness sake. Look..Rashad..I am a woman too. And since you had a woman, i'm going to assume you like them. So, listen to a WOMAN. First of all, dont let any man tell you a woman does NOT like flowers, candy, love texts, etc. We absolutely do. Just IN MODERATION. Like you yourself said, a BALANCE. BALANCE. Say it again..BALANCE. So, instead of you sending love texts EVERY single day, perhaps once every two weeks would have been cool. If you were doing a lot of lovey dovey stuff, probably just cutting it in HALF would have done it for ya. That keeps a woman thinking you are a sweetheart, without wondering if you are a cream puff. Heck, my boyfriend gave me a candlelit dinner a couple of weeks ago. I have NEVER had a guy do that for me..EVER. EVER. You think i didn't like that?? No..i didnt. I LOVED it. However, if he did that EVERY single day, the thrill would wear off. You see what I'm saying? I just don't want you, or any guy reading this thread, to think that we women dont like lovey, romantic stuff done for us. I don't want you to think that you need to act like an a$$ p-ri-ck in order to have women. Guys like that are a dime a dozen. I HATE them. But a guy who is kind, sweet and thoughtful, while still retaining his balls, is a HOME RUN. Moderation, is all. So, put down that remote, and step away from the R-Kelly videos.
Don Ho Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 Dazzel, correct me if I am wrong. You stated that the two men that are most important in your life, your Ex and your current BF DO NOT send you emails, flowers and so on. Is that correct? If so, my point was that you said you want all that "lovey" stuff yet the two men you ended up with are not like that. My point was that women SAY they want all of that and then they are usually attracted to and get into a relationship with a man that does not do that. So you're going to dump your current BF (who does sound like a jerk BTW) and find a lovey guy? Bet you $$ you end up with another one just like him. Also Dazzel, I didn't say for a guy to never do that that "lovey" stuff as Rashad calls it; this whole thread was for Rashad and how I thought he over did it, turned into a pussy and she therefore dumped him. I believe he agreed with my assessment. Nikki likewise agreed with my point of view. Now IF a guy can do all that lovey stuff, retain his manhood and have a continuing successful relationship or marriage, then more power to him. Nothing wrong with that. However, this forum is about Break Ups and 90% of these guys turn into pussies and don't even get why their Ex dumped them. Also, I think you are being very sexist, don ho. Stereotypical too. I wouldn't listen to your advice at all. No offense, but dang, it ticked me off. If you are into someone a lot, why not show it? That's how they know it. Glad I ticked you off!! That makes you THINK. I'm not sure how you think it's "sexist". Men are men and women are women. Women want a MAN and a MAN wants a woman. Now when a MAN starts acting like a woman; giving in, professing his love all the time, chasing her, letting her do what ever she wants, then he is going to get dumped. Actually it works both ways. If a man is with a woman that has not backbone, falls at his feet all the time and so on, he is going to lose interest and dump her. Weakness is unattractive to either sex. You can show you care, but when you become a total wuss (either sex) your S.O. will lose interest. I have posted previously BTW that a woman can be a wuss also. He shouldn't have to change who he is to get a woman. Let them know what they are getting. If he likes doing those things for her, then let him. He is only fooling himself if he makes himself be someone he's not. Yeah right. People change all the time to get a job, get a more attractive mate, to become happier in their lives and so on. Rashad started his relationship as a confident, funny, caring, athletic man. He will even admit as it went along he became less of a man and turned into a pussy. So he should tell his next future GF what? "Hey, I start off strong and you're attracted to that, but after time, I have to warn you I have been known to turn into a pussy"? I suppose you will tell your male children that great old advice when they're ready to date: "just be nice, kind and act like yourself and women will be attracted to you". Hope I have you totally miffed by now. BTW, if you think about it we're not that far off on our position. Oh and if you need my advice about not hooking up with another prick, let me know!
Don Ho Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 But a guy who is kind, sweet and thoughtful, while still retaining his balls, is a HOME RUN. Blue, there you have it. The problem is that a majority of guys DO NOT retain their balls after they're in a relationship for a while. Do you disagree that when a guy starts acting like a pussy that it turns you off and you would end up dumping him? I never said be an A-hole, I don't know how that came up. Anyway, we could go round and round debating about this for weeks. The point is that guys should not turn into pussies as they go along in a relationship or they will get dumped and wonder why. That is what happened to Rashad and I stick by my advice to him.
Dazzel Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 Not even gonna bother with this anymore. I can't even be bothered. The thing is, the guys who have the same interests as me tend to be the ones who are aloof. And you say those who are aloof get all the girls. Wrong. Guys who are aloof get broken up with, as you see with me. And guys that are what you call pussies get broken up with too, referring to the topic creator's post. I guess you could say I like "pussy" men. To each their own. I like what I like. They probably compliment me better. I tend to be a stubborn, hard-nosed bitch myself. It's probably all about this 'balance' spoken of. Maybe I should be the MAN in the relationship. Hell, I feel like that already. I'm the one who drives and wants sex, and he won't do either. I seriously have the balls in this one. And to the topic creator, I am sorry about your thread getting really derailed. I will shut up now. And best of luck to you. I really hope you find someone who really likes you for who you are.
Author Rashad Posted September 8, 2010 Author Posted September 8, 2010 Not even gonna bother with this anymore. I can't even be bothered. The thing is, the guys who have the same interests as me tend to be the ones who are aloof. And you say those who are aloof get all the girls. Wrong. Guys who are aloof get broken up with, as you see with me. And guys that are what you call pussies get broken up with too, referring to the topic creator's post. I guess you could say I like "pussy" men. To each their own. I like what I like. They probably compliment me better. I tend to be a stubborn, hard-nosed bitch myself. It's probably all about this 'balance' spoken of. Maybe I should be the MAN in the relationship. Hell, I feel like that already. I'm the one who drives and wants sex, and he won't do either. I seriously have the balls in this one. And to the topic creator, I am sorry about your thread getting really derailed. I will shut up now. And best of luck to you. I really hope you find someone who really likes you for who you are. Lol, no I actually got what I wanted... At the end of the day I'm going to be myself, I can't help it but do good to people that I love. At the same time I'll make sure that I don't over do it. Another thing is, and I don't want to come off as cocky, but I'm pretty good at reading people, my ex would always tell me that I'm smart to the point were it felt like I was telepathic and that freaked her. Like for example I'd know when she needed time to be alone, without her telling me. I'd actually figured her periodic cycle on my own hahaha, I can't effing help it I'm too open to signals and suggestions. She despised that cause she felt open and defenseless. pssst, I think I get what everybody here is trying to say... I got this
NewToLS Posted September 9, 2010 Posted September 9, 2010 To be completely woman you need a master, and in him a compass for your life. You need a man you can look up to and respect. If you dethrone him it's no wonder that you are discontented, and discontented women are not loved for long. Marlene Dietrich Just an interesting quote I found. Keep on, Don Ho! You speak the truth regardless of how truth hurts sometimes. Men and women are different. We were created that way. We each have our given strengths and weaknesses and when we start tampering with that, we lose. I think we have tried to "equalize" the sexes so much, you can't tell man from woman. Women are nurturers, care-givers, thoughtful, tender. Men are solid, strong, decision-making, logical, comforters. And none of this is bad or abusive. It's coherent, cohesive, and balanced. But, I'm a lost breed. Give me a real man and I'll be real woman. I don't want to change oil, don't think I should. Don't want a man to wash dishes, don't think he should. That doesn't mean either part is abusive, unkind or unloving. That's why it's so true that women abhor men who turn into pussies, and men, in turn, end up resenting women who tell them every step to take. Whew! Heavy for a Wednesday night! Cheers!
Don Ho Posted September 9, 2010 Posted September 9, 2010 Hey Rashad. Of course you can be yourself. It occurred to me at the beginning of your thread that you had gone from being a strong man (which is what attracted her) to less than one during your relationship. It's good that you have intuition, don't forget to listen to it. I only wanted to point out what happened so you could understand and hopefully not repeat that behavior with your next GF and not get dumped. Now go find a new one, you cocky little prick!!
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