Have a first date coming up and want to know what topics wuld be considered boring?

[PhillyDude]

I'm guessing anything that has to do with work or family but curious to know what topics should I stay away from?

[Rorschach]

Conversation is a skill, different things are boring to different people and it's through skill alone that you can really tell which are which. Have to learn to read facial expressions and body language and also be good at leading a conversation with out talking too much (hint: questions).

 

Good advice: A person's favorite topic is themself.

[Green]

Conversation is a skill, different things are boring to different people and it's through skill alone that you can really tell which are which. Have to learn to read facial expressions and body language and also be good at leading a conversation with out talking too much (hint: questions).

 

Good advice: A person's favorite topic is themself.

 

I agree with this post.

 

Also I'd like to add BE YOURSELF don't be a fake version of yourself saying and doing the things you think she wants to hear... be the confident version of yourself not afraid to have FUN and for the love of mike KISS HER... don't ask just kiss her some time before the date is over.

[PhillyDude]

I agree with this post.

 

Also I'd like to add BE YOURSELF don't be a fake version of yourself saying and doing the things you think she wants to hear... be the confident version of yourself not afraid to have FUN and for the love of mike KISS HER... don't ask just kiss her some time before the date is over.

 

I just want to focus on having a good conversation before I think about kissing her which probably wouldn't be on the first date anyway

[dispatch3d]

your doing it wrong. Look for interesting things to talk about, rather than what NOT to talk about.

 

Like you don't want to be thinking about not talking about work. You want to be thinking about what fun and interesting things you would like to talk about with this person.

 

You're in the "don't **** up" mindset rather than the "blow them out of their shoes" mindset. Best to shoot for the latter.

[PhillyDude]

Three fun things I should be talking about on a date? I'm asking because I'm not good when it comes to first dates

[dispatch3d]

My roommates went to a wedding recently in a nearby town. At the bachelorette party one of the tasks was to get another guys underwear. So the bride, at the bar, went into the bathroom with a guy to "switch underwear". My roommates girlfriend was outside banging on the door saying I'm going to come in and she found them standing there naked (I think the door had no lock and she busted in). The first thing out of her mouth was "We didn't have sex".

 

Could probably talk about that one for like an hour.

[dispatch3d]

are you friends with girls? Talk about the **** you normally talk about around them...

 

 

yet another reason to have solid girls-as-friends.

[Rorschach]

Three fun things I should be talking about on a date? I'm asking because I'm not good when it comes to first dates

 

First few minutes should go something like this

 

'so tell me about yourself'

 

'oh I like X Y and Z'

 

'Oh tell me about X'

 

*she talks about X, you ask her as many questions as you can to keep her on this subject (or on whatever subject this leads to, for isntance if she says I like X because I get to do stuff and because it makes me feel Z, say 'oh how does it make you feel Z?' etc etc) for. AND ACTUALLY LISTEN, seriously questions are useless if you don't honestly care about what she says*

 

when you reach a dead end in conversation

 

'You said you like Y? I've done Y too! What about it do you like so much?

 

Its not difficult in my opinion, once you know the rules.

[Pyro]

you ask her at the beginning of the date what she likes, her interests, etc. and start your conversation from there. I bet you have at least one similar interest to discuss.

[D-Lish]

You don't have to be great at conversation in order to inspire great conversation. You just have to know how to ask questions that inspire people to open up.

 

Everyone is passionate about something- and it's not hard to figure out what your date is passionate about. You probably already have clues from your exchanges thus far.

[PhillyDude]

are you friends with girls? Talk about the **** you normally talk about around them...

 

 

yet another reason to have solid girls-as-friends.

 

 

I don't think I can talk about tv shows on a date

[Pyro]

First few minutes should go something like this

 

'so tell me about yourself'

 

'oh I like X Y and Z'

 

'Oh tell me about X'

 

*she talks about X, you ask her as many questions as you can to keep her on this subject (or on whatever subject this leads to, for isntance if she says I like X because I get to do stuff and because it makes me feel Z, say 'oh how does it make you feel Z?' etc etc) for. AND ACTUALLY LISTEN, seriously questions are useless if you don't honestly care about what she says*

 

when you reach a dead end in conversation

 

'You said you like Y? I've done Y too! What about it do you like so much?

 

Its not difficult in my opinion, once you know the rules.

 

this sounds better than how I put it.

[dispatch3d]

gold dlish pure gold.

 

If you have a passion discuss that. If she has one get her to talk about it.

 

The guy who said ask her what she does yadayada. Oh your into x y z lets talk about z. Not something I do anymore really. I mean, no offence to her but why would i give a **** about point z? Unless it's a common interest I'd prefer to keep the conversation on something else.

 

At least initially. I like to be entertained the entire date.....

[dispatch3d]

I don't think I can talk about tv shows on a date

 

You could probably talk about entertainment for a little bit. At least initially. It kinda depends on what stage you're at with the girl. It sounds like you're at the initial stage (trying to get her interested). In which case I would try to keep the conversation centered around interesting topics.

 

You're into girly tv shows? Like what? Grey's anatomy or something? I liked the episode with the bomb.... kaBOOM.

 

You'll notice my example has nothing to do with tv shows.....

 

Any traveling you've done is a good one too. Or any good stories you have? I usually have a few in cycle, although I've been getting lazier with them (NOT GOOD)....

[Rorschach]

gold dlish pure gold.

 

If you have a passion discuss that. If she has one get her to talk about it.

 

The guy who said ask her what she does yadayada. Oh your into x y z lets talk about z. Not something I do anymore really. I mean, no offence to her but why would i give a **** about point z? Unless it's a common interest I'd prefer to keep the conversation on something else.

 

At least initially. I like to be entertained the entire date.....

 

Because theoretically this is somebody you could be spending the rest of your life with and how she feels about certain topics even if you don't find them incredibly interesting is absolutely vital to the relationship?

 

But no, not important at all

 

I do agree to a certain extent though, if she says that she likes rap music, and you HATE rap music, don't ask her why this isn't a conversation you want to go down.

[dispatch3d]

Because theoretically this is somebody you could be spending the rest of your life with and how she feels about certain topics even if you don't find them incredibly interesting is absolutely vital to the relationship?

 

But no, not important at all

 

I do agree to a certain extent though, if she says that she likes rap music, and you HATE rap music, don't ask her why this isn't a conversation you want to go down.

 

My general approach is to get them interested enough so that they start doing what you suggested. Ie. so what stuff are you into, oh that's really cool I've always wanted to do yadayada etc. I mean you could just start talking about what you do and see if they take an interest in any particular thing.

 

If you can get them attracted it's a lot easier though. So talking about accomplishments at (something) in a non-bragging way, telling stories that are entertaining on their own (like the wedding one which is ****ing hilarious, and honestly I just enjoy talking about that ****) etc. works fine.

 

I personally just enjoy talking about funny things, things I saw, etc. Fire tornado in brazil anyone? Or I may ask her personal interests/just bust on her or give her **** about stuff in general....

 

This is kinda that "spark"-thing girls talk about....

[Rorschach]

Everybody is different I suppose but 90% of the time I find it's easier to get a better response if you start the conversation talking about them, ideally in the course of the questioning you find something you both like and talk about that.

 

I have alot of interesting stories but they are things I share with friends, not with potential love interests.