thegeneralmad Posted September 5, 2010 Posted September 5, 2010 Alright. I am going to get my ex back. I have to try. Let me just quickly explain my situation. Met in highschool, wanted each other for four years (****, I have been in love with him since I was 14), finally got together for four years, had a long distance relationship (1.5 hrs apart) moved out together in March of this year, I was down because I wasn't in school, work was ****ty, and I didn't have friends. I was afraid of alot of things, mostly going out into the wilderness, which is what my ex loves to do (keep in mind, I really wanted/want to do these things, it was just one of my fears so I didn't, but I'm getting over that now). Anyway, I started to become naggy and depressed about my situation, I basically emotionally abandoned the relationship. My ex tried so hard to convince me everything was going to be ok and that I need to lighten up about things. In July we broke up because I threw one of many fits about him hanging out with his friends ( not a suspicious thing, I guess I was jealous that he had friends? or just lonely that he wasn't there for me? it was a combination of the two). Bad break up for me, for him, really hard too, but he is coping. I think he got to the point where he felt like he had to give up because he thought I had given up. He recently told me that I just wasn't what he needed, but he was crying when he said this, and that I can't contact him anymore, he wants me to move on, he wants to get over me ( oh yeah, he is also going into the military, so this might have something to do with it). I want to respect his wishes, and have been doing just that, but I just want to show him that I never wanted to be that person, it was just the stress of moving out for the first time, lack of friends, fears, and work. I couldn't express this to him before because I was a wreck when I would have to go over there and get all of my stuff (your mind is clouded and emotions take control). I need to do something about this. I do not want to let him go. I know I need to fight for him. Also, what we had was really amazing and he left still being in love with me, granted he was/is my first love, but I do not want to try with other men, I have and I just feel disgusted and sick. Also never wanted another man, if you believe in the term "soulmate" this was/is it. Please, don't just tell me it was his loss or that it wasn't my fault or that I should just move on and it wasn't meant to be, I don't want to hear it. I need some real, solid advice on how I can try again. Thank you, and I apologize if I come off as rude.
Author thegeneralmad Posted September 5, 2010 Author Posted September 5, 2010 Perhaps I should have posted this under the breakup section. Well, I would still love the advice and/or comments.
Don Ho Posted September 5, 2010 Posted September 5, 2010 Please, don't just tell me it was his loss or that it wasn't my fault or that I should just move on and it wasn't meant to be, I don't want to hear it. I need some real, solid advice on how I can try again. Hi General. Sorry you're in this situation and I can understand how upsetting this is and that you want him back. Look at what you said. What's left for us to tell you? So you want us to blow hope and sunshine up your a$$? I think you need to chill. Any move you make at this point is going to be the wrong move. Do not contact him. Talking, chasing, explaining is only going to push him FURTHER away.
Trovador Posted September 5, 2010 Posted September 5, 2010 You are too much emotional right now to handle this situation... if you want to go for him do it when you are capable of handling in a mature way whatever he chooses to do, which could be a plain rejection... Wait some days, let him breathe a little, and relax... we tend to worry out of proportion in these matters... So, I'd wait some time (whenever it takes to see things more objectively) before reaching out and it's possible he'll contact you first...
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