Misty2004 Posted February 20, 2004 Posted February 20, 2004 Feeling so sorry for myself at the moment. It's just so unfair! I was the one that is mentally abused and battered. i'm the one who feels like she's had her heart broken. And he walks away scot free!! Where's the justice in that? It was he's hang-ups about me, that got me into this situation. He's hang-ups that meant I was an outsider in his life while all the time he claimed he wanted me there. He says he hates himself for what he done. That he does love me, he wanted me in his life balh blah blah! Oh yeah, right! Just not enuf to face your hang-ups. Yeahright. you really hate yourself when you can walk away scot free and start again with someone else straightaway, where there is no hang-ups. And even then claim you love me!! I know i'm better off without him but it's just so unfair! Why am I suffering for his problems when he just walks away from them??
befuddled11 Posted February 20, 2004 Posted February 20, 2004 I've surely been in your shoes, and have felt the way you're feeling now. Here's some things to think about that might help decrease your feelings of injustice. It's a known fact that when a relationship ends, guys as a rule don't take the time to heal...they just jump right back into a new relationship.....and therefore, they never take the time to do any self-reflecting and soulsearching as to what part THEY played in the demise of their past relationship.....so, they never really realize or acknowledge their "hangups" or problems....so they'll eventually go on to repeat them in future relationships......and they'll just end up going from one FAILED relationship to another. I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like a very fulfilling life to me. My ex husband from many years ago was very physically and emotionally abusive to me (he was even charged w/ assault). When I moved out, after the 'final straw' (of his abuse), it wasn't long (maybe a day) before he was seeing other women, sleeping with half the town and neighboring towns. Of course it hurt and infuriated me.....that he was just going on about his life with no real repercussions for his horrible mistreatment of me........and that really p*ssed me off. But over time, I came to the realization that I actually felt PITY and SORRY for him..........because short of him getting hit by lightening and having an epiphany such that he realized what an abusive loser he was, he would NEVER realize his problems with control, anger, manipulation, self-hatred, having no respect for women......and he would (and will) spend the rest of his life abusing women and NEVER having a truly healthy, fulfilling, functional, loving, respectful, lasting relationship..............and one day he'll end up a very old man, all alone, filled with regrets and maybe some guilt....and there won't be a damn thing he'll be able to do about it. So anyway, while your guy appears to have gotten off 'scott-free', it may appear like that now, on the surface, but you're the real winner here....because you're no longer with him and you can now heal and move forward and be ready one day to be with a good man who deserves you.
monkey Posted February 20, 2004 Posted February 20, 2004 Misty it's a right bastard, i feel for you & i know your score, people who believe they suffered & had to leave because of us! How they can live with themselves & look at themselves in the mirror in the mornings without guilt is beyond me, if they can do that, when initially i thought they couldn't eases the pain a little. Some people just aren't the people we thought. I'd have mine back tommorow, but i'd still have this thing in me that would want me to tell them to **** em selves!
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