Thorgs Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t236526/ Here's my story. Right now I'm having a really hard time and on top of it, I have to hear about the ex every day because her daughter goes to school where I work and eats lunch with my student and me. This is just horrible.
skydiveaddict Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t236526/ Here's my story. Right now I'm having a really hard time and on top of it, I have to hear about the ex every day because her daughter goes to school where I work and eats lunch with my student and me. This is just horrible. Get yourself OUT of that situation at once, Go eat lunch somewhere else. That should be easily done. I would think the two kids could have lunch w/out you with no problem
Author Thorgs Posted September 3, 2010 Author Posted September 3, 2010 Get yourself OUT of that situation at once, Go eat lunch somewhere else. That should be easily done. I would think the two kids could have lunch w/out you with no problem I wish, but I have to watch my student during his lunch break (it isn't mine) and he is friends with the daughter. Since he doesn't really have any friends I let it slide because he needs some sort of social outlet...but it's ****ing killing me.
skydiveaddict Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 I wish, but I have to watch my student during his lunch break (it isn't mine) and he is friends with the daughter. Since he doesn't really have any friends I let it slide because he needs some sort of social outlet...but it's ****ing killing me. Then tell the daughter it's not permissible to talk about mom during lunch. You must do what you can to diffuse this. You're going to drive yourself nuts if you dont
Author Thorgs Posted September 3, 2010 Author Posted September 3, 2010 Then tell the daughter it's not permissible to talk about mom during lunch. You must do what you can to diffuse this. You're going to drive yourself nuts if you dont I know, I'm just trying to find a nice way to tell this group of kids to not talk about her anymore without sounding like a jerk. Blah
skydiveaddict Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 I know, I'm just trying to find a nice way to tell this group of kids to not talk about her anymore without sounding like a jerk. Blah I think for your own sanity you need to.. I mean, you're the teacher after all. There must be plenty of topics you can talk about besides "her". I'm not criticizing you, I couldnt take it either. Steer the convo in a different direction.
Author Thorgs Posted September 3, 2010 Author Posted September 3, 2010 I think for your own sanity you need to.. I mean, you're the teacher after all. There must be plenty of topics you can talk about besides "her". I'm not criticizing you, I couldnt take it either. Steer the convo in a different direction. Yeah I agree. It's hard cause the daughter wants to update me on all that's happened since we last hung out...which makes it hard and makes me upset at the same time...I find myself jokingly saying negative things about her mom and I can't do this anymore. Tomorrow if she brings her up I'm going to just ask her to not bring her up anymore because her mom and I aren't friends anymore.
Don Ho Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 Naaa. How about coming up with something like "during lunch we're only going to talk about school or X or Z, but we don't talk about other people that aren't here". You know, try to make it a lesson that it's not nice to talk about people when they're not around or talk behind their back. Or "I've decided during lunch we're going to talk about today's events and current events". Bring a USA Today with you everyday. Or the very local newspaper. Come on Bro, YOU'RE the teacher, come up with something!!
Author Thorgs Posted September 3, 2010 Author Posted September 3, 2010 Technically I am not a teacher...just a Para. I'll see how today goes. If she comes up I'm dropping the hammer
Author Thorgs Posted September 3, 2010 Author Posted September 3, 2010 Well, she didn't eat with us today, maybe she saw my FB status yesterday about "the more I hear about you the more pathetic you become."
lilbunny Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 Thorgs, I can really sympathise with the difficulties of school and home life clashing like this. I'm not familiar with your role, I am guessing this is the equivalent of a teaching assistant. How old are the children involved? I might be better able to make suggestions if I know the age group. As an aside, is it appropriate for children at the school you work in being able to view your facebook status/ You have no R with the mother of this child, could you explain that it wouldn't be appropriate to be friends in this way anymore because you are a member of staff, but can still be friends in school? If this child has read this it may have been uncomfortable or upsetting for her. Always remember you are the adult in the situation and should and can take charge accordingly.
Author Thorgs Posted September 3, 2010 Author Posted September 3, 2010 Thorgs, I can really sympathise with the difficulties of school and home life clashing like this. I'm not familiar with your role, I am guessing this is the equivalent of a teaching assistant. How old are the children involved? I might be better able to make suggestions if I know the age group. As an aside, is it appropriate for children at the school you work in being able to view your facebook status/ You have no R with the mother of this child, could you explain that it wouldn't be appropriate to be friends in this way anymore because you are a member of staff, but can still be friends in school? If this child has read this it may have been uncomfortable or upsetting for her. Always remember you are the adult in the situation and should and can take charge accordingly. Well, I told the ex after she shattered my life that I would delete her daughters if she wanted me to because I'm not looking to get in trouble if she was against me having them as friends, but she said she doesn't care. Since we were all really close I decided to keep them because they do mean a lot to me and we were close. I never post anything mean or inappropriate on my FB to be honest, it's not real life and it's all set to the highest private settings anyways. That status was the exception. I was really down and hurt when I posted it, which I rarely do when I'm like that and I deleted it shortly after. The daughters are 11th and 8th grade. She came up to me at the end of the day anyways and we shot the **** for a few minutes so I'm guessing she just wanted to eat with some other friends for once, which is good. I just don't know a nice way to ask her to not talk about her mom to me because we were all really close and I don't want to sound like a jerk. And yes, a Para is almost like a teacher aide...we get crapped on and paid very little for working very hard. Time for a new job???
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