whitepelican Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 to make a very long breakup short is hard, but i'll try. roughly nine months ago my ex-bf and i called it quits. over the course of those nine months there have been a lot of ups and downs - ex sex, endless cycle of talking then not talking, drunken moments, tears, etc. it seemed to come to a head before summer and i assumed we would be leaving each other alone. this was not the case. over the summer my ex has contacted me a few times, usually late at night, usually drunk, and like a fool i respond and the cycle starts again. finally i got fed up and a few weeks ago i told him to stop texting me if sex was his only priority (he only texts me. we can barely say a word if we run into one another in public but - i'd like to say hi, but nerves always get in the way). i got a response three days later saying it was for the best if we don't talk/text/etc. i agreed whole heartedly. well, a week ago my ex texted me late in the night. i was just getting off work, tired, and pissed to see his number in my phone. i decided to just go talk with him and he confessed i was the only person he's really loved (i can also say he's the only person i've really loved), that he's thought about talking to me/calling me for lunch but never can work up the courage, and apologized profusely for being a "man dick" as he put it. i've had my moments of feeling used and putting myself in a position to get used. i'm not blameless. i've been nervous around him, not known what to do, and made an ass out of myself more times than i can remember. however, i've not wanted either of us to be in a ****ty position anymore and since the beginning of summer have not contacted him unless it's been in response to his messages. out of a summer of emotional confusion comes two questions: after nine months, is my ex hung up on me or am i really being used? are his drunken emotions legitimate - always hear people are most honest when less inhibited? i've been kind of in a daze emotionally after hearing all he said a week ago. i saw him out the night after talking and he said nothing to me, as usual, and i didn't have the courage to say hello either. guess i'm just searching for others' input to help me sort out my thoughts and put this relationship to rest. thanks for any responses!
TaraMaiden Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 Do the words "toxic relationship" mean anything to you? I don't know how old you are, but you sound young. So you're playing mind games, and it's an immature thing to do..... Go No Contact, and leave him alone. Don't pick up, don't answer, don't respond, don't yank his chain, don't let him yank yours. Delete him off FaceBook, don't send him texts don't e-mail....nothing. Zip. Nada. Zilch. END IT. Simple.
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