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letter I'll never send


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Posted

I haven't thought about him that much lately, but found a picture of him on my computer, and the old sadness came bubbling up. I wrote this. I don't think I'll ever send it, but I want someone somewhere to read it.

 

 

 

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Scott,

 

 

I want you to know that it still hurts that someone I loved and trusted betrayed me repeatedly in such a callous way. I believed your promises until the end. That last day we took the hike and you asked me to give you a hug, there wasn’t a part of me that thought you’d betray me again.

 

There is no excuse for what you did. It was cowardly and cruel. If you had been a decent person, you would have done the right thing, honored your promise and told me in person. Instead you took the easy way out and treated my feelings with total disregard.

 

I hope you know deep down somewhere past your defenses, past what your friends and family tell you to make you feel better, how ****ty and wrong that was. I want you to know that despite your attempts to delete me from your life, to file this away as some immature mistake discrete from who you are, the pain you caused is real and won't disappear with the click of a mouse.

 

Perhaps, one day you'll have the maturity and courage to apologize. I really cared about you, Scott, deeply, and I didn’t deserve that.

Posted

Don't say you don't think you'll ever send it. Promise yourself you won't.

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Posted
Don't say you don't think you'll ever send it. Promise yourself you won't.

 

I won't. Posting it on here has already satisfied my urge.

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