Omei Posted August 28, 2010 Posted August 28, 2010 Today is weird. The time I spent with my BF was quite and awkward...hes usually a very upbeat, pleasant talkative guy. Its been a week since I last saw him real life for 2 months and I am going through this 'sad phase' he was being very supportive at first, now hes being like enough is enough and with the mood he was in today I am pretty sure I worn out his sympathy cards. I hope he was just tired like he said. I am afraid that I pushed too much of my 'I miss you' on him. I am trying my hardest to find something to do but with my child on a very long daycare waiting list I am stuck at home and playing with her is fun eventually that ends and I am bored being stuck at home sucks. I feel all this pent up energy to do stuff now! lol anyone ever get like this?
LisaLee Posted August 29, 2010 Posted August 29, 2010 I am currently going through it right now. He left last Sunday and I am still fighting my blues. The depression over him leaving has been especially bad this time. And since I get cranky when I get in a funk I don't just do the "I miss you" lines I do "I miss you and F U CK THIS DISTANCE!!! Why aren't you as sad as me?!?" Fortunately during the week I am so busy in the day I don't focus on it as much. It is when I come home all alone, and lay in bed alone that I get pretty blue. Today has been especially depressing. It is our anniversary, and kind of... just another day... because we have no real way to celebrate. I took a quiz that is due on Monday and he is currently working on a presentation for his lab. Buuuttt, as I have said in past posts, my SO has the patience of a saint. I often seriously wonder how the heck he puts up with me. He knows I have been depressed all week and he said tonight "Next week I will do all that I can to make you feel better." He also mentioned he was very sad, too, and I knew his feelings was because of my own sadness. That helped to snap me out of it a little, because I hate the idea of him being blue because of me. Anyway, my only suggestion is to keep as busy as you can. Take your daughter to the park, go to the library, do anything to get a little busier with your life. Beyond that, the best thing to do is to let the blues run its course. Or maybe when you talk to him you can focus on the positives? Sometimes what helps me is planning out our next visit, or our move to be with each other permanently. When are you and your SO planning on seeing each other again?
Author Omei Posted August 29, 2010 Author Posted August 29, 2010 (edited) Anyway, my only suggestion is to keep as busy as you can. Take your daughter to the park, go to the library, do anything to get a little busier with your life. Beyond that, the best thing to do is to let the blues run its course. Or maybe when you talk to him you can focus on the positives? Sometimes what helps me is planning out our next visit, or our move to be with each other permanently. When are you and your SO planning on seeing each other again? Our next visit I hope will happen at X-mas during his college break just for a week most likely I wish it was longer, It would be cheaper for him to come here but I might end up going there because he came here last time and he thinks his family would be pretty upset with him if he left on X-mas since its such a huge deal to them, I know my family wouldn't mind as much. I will prolly go see him for 1 week the Monday after X-mas weekend. So about in 4 months! I can't wait I can do it! we waited 9 months to see each other the first time! When is your next visit? Ps, anyone travel to their love around X-mas? Is it more expensive? Is it harder? I have been doing 400$ flights so far in this relationship...how bad does X-mas get? Edited August 29, 2010 by Omei
LisaLee Posted August 29, 2010 Posted August 29, 2010 I seem to recall another thread where Christmas visits came up and I think about 3 or 4 couples on here are doing XMas visits this year. My SO and I are going to plan an XMas visit, it will also be when he meets my mom. I don't know how we're going to do it with my work schedule, when I fly home, and when he flies. We have a lot of hammering out to do. And yes, XMas visits are more expensive, usually. Thanksgiving and XMas are the worst times to get plane tickets. We see each other again in October.The most we paid for tickets was $180, and that was because we waited so late to make the purchase. Our trips are affordable in comparison with others, but the relationship has still been quite expensive for the both of us!
Author Omei Posted August 29, 2010 Author Posted August 29, 2010 Are you and he nervous about the mom meet? My bf meet almost my whole family they loved him to bits and spoiled him with Canadian souvenirs this made me happy, esp knowing I had my mothers support about my LDR. I hope your meeting go's well....and It sounds like I am going to dread the prices. When I visit him I have to save for ticket plus hotel and food costs. (I have my own setup, hes still at home with college) His house is jammed with siblings (Big family) and we cant have too much romance like that so we hotel it when I visit. Lots of saving to do =/ Btw this is my first time around here joined yesterday everyone says my 'SO' I am guessing that means significant other?
LisaLee Posted August 29, 2010 Posted August 29, 2010 Are you and he nervous about the mom meet? Yes, SO is significant other. I am only nervous in the sense that my mom is traditional, but also a bit of a loudmouth. She owns two homes and is saying that we will have to sleep at difference houses because we're not married. And the first time she saw him on Skype she said he looked like a nerd. But I am planning on giving her a nice talking to about minding her manners when he comes.
Author Omei Posted August 29, 2010 Author Posted August 29, 2010 Yes, SO is significant other. I am only nervous in the sense that my mom is traditional, but also a bit of a loudmouth. She owns two homes and is saying that we will have to sleep at difference houses because we're not married. And the first time she saw him on Skype she said he looked like a nerd. But I am planning on giving her a nice talking to about minding her manners when he comes. I never showed my mom my bf on cam or even talked about him much before they met in person, shes the type of woman who doesn't care unless he's there in the flesh. Ouch difference houses? how do you feel about that? I wouldn't be able to stand it that's just me, My bf was worried about his mom too when I meet her she was also a loudmouth and he was nervous about it I remember him rolling his eyes and being like 'Okay, mom she doesn't need to know or hear about this random stuff.' lol
aerogurl87 Posted August 29, 2010 Posted August 29, 2010 First off Omei I love your avatar (I'm love drawing manga ). Secondly, when I left my boyfriend the first time I felt sad, but he went into a full blown depressive state. I had my friends home for the summer so that helped me cope. But now that university's started back up again and they're all gone and I have nothing to do with my time but work and read, I get sad like every other day when I think of how he's not here. And you'd think having a date in mind to see each other (October 22nd, woohoo!) would make things better. But no, time is going by like a sloth running a marathon. I now keep making this mental countdown everyday which is making things all the more worse and it's like we'll be talking and reminiscing or talking about what we plan to do together this time and I'll just get sad. While he on the other hand, is doing better now when it comes to dealing with us being apart at the moment.
Romance Posted August 29, 2010 Posted August 29, 2010 I am having a VERY bad week sadness wise. He left last sunday and school began and I just feel upset because since school has began, I barely will see him. I was at his house the week before school started and one of the nights, out of nowhere i began thinking about how it'd be when i went back home and I just layed in his bed and cried for hours. I felt bad, but I just was so upset. He fortunately understood and comforted me but it helps to know he's hurting too. it's hard for me whenever i'm like 'i miss you so much' and he's just like 'well we'll see each other in 3 weeks! so dont think about it!" ..it's not that easy.
Author Omei Posted August 30, 2010 Author Posted August 30, 2010 So my bf is totally annoyed with me he says i am sad too much and to stop being so negative about the future. He says i am too emotional since our visit. we got into a fight which ended with him saying 'I havn't felt good about us for a long time' He just left 10 days ago, everything was fine then. I am worried. I have been trying to not be too emotional anymore. we've never gotten like this before.
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