HONESTLY: What sized girls do guys prefer?

[Leigh 87]

azhure - Thanks so much for your heart felt response. I had anorexia about 4 - 5 yrs ago at 18, but I never dropped below about 44 kilos, so physically I never got too bad. I was anroexic for not too long, no more than 1 year.

 

I did not get professional help and gained on my own, but then relapsed; I gained again, and for the past 2 years I have been stable at 50 - 52 kilos.

 

I look reletively healthy at 52 kilos though. I was no longer anorexic, but I still had an eatinfg disorder. I ate a maintenance amount, and liked my body, but there was still something not quiet right.

 

So, in the past 2 mnths, I decdied to gain to BMI 20, for the first time in 3 or more years. I ate 2500 cals a day up until last week.

 

I HAVE develope a strong sense of self cos of the ED, as I learnt that I would NEVER be happy through my body alone. It was never good enough for me any ways, my body....

 

I do not have a treatment team. I have only juststarted to see a therapist, to help deal with my social isolation.

 

I do get looked at more now that I am BMI 20 ish. My body type is fine where it is lol, I am plenty curvy, and do not need to gain more. I would actually rather die. So the intense fear of fat is still very much alive.

 

But at least I eat normal amounts, and look and feel physicually normal and healthy.

 

AND ABOUT EXERCISE : I became a certified trainer after initially trying to recover, and I am also enrolled in a food science and nutrition degree, and have the common sense to know that being healthy and active r key.

 

thin and unhealthy = unnatractive. Skinny peeople can eat right and exercisde and look great, as can thicker women.

 

Hopefully the more I can be myself in public, the easier it weill be to meet guys.

 

I only have the gym to meet guys at this moment, I am resigned to the fact that I will prob have to wait until i start University next year, to make guy friends and meet any love interests.

 

I do not use sex toys, so great, it will be a long wait for me to have any fun.

 

It just sucks cos there r lot sof girls heavie than me who get guys and get the intimacy and fun I am after. I am not even after a serious relationship, just a guy to watch DVD'S with and who likes me. Just for fun, you know?

[Philetus]

I will take a pic soon, but OKAY: I just want the truth about what guys find PHYSICALLY desirable in a women........... WHAT makes you want to get PHYSICAL with her?

 

I am wel lproportioned. Flat stomach. I have blonde hair ans light blue eyes.

 

I am not thin/skinny, not a tiny model body type, because my body type dictates that I have large ample ( but not HUGE looking) boobs, and a bubble/ perky curvy butt.

 

HOW many guys like a more petite women? I am about 5 ' 5, so do a lot of you feel more sexually attracted to women of 115 - 110 lbs at 5 '; 5?

 

I know some guys must find me attractive, but I just wish I knew where I stood.

 

I do not do heavy weights, and instead do daily Pilates, walk a lot, and have started a basic dance class at my gym 2 nights a week.

 

I feel more feminine when I am not too muscular. Toned, but not big muscles.

 

FTR - you seem like someone I would be very attracted to physically.

 

5'5" and 115-120 sounds pretty good to me.

 

I like athletic women who are, as you say, 'toned but not big muscles'. I find arms and legs that have some definition to be intoxicatingly sexy. Firmish ass and breasts that are proportional. A flatish stomach. "Flab" is a big turn off. I've dated women who have larger body types and found them to be very sexy but there bodies were 'tight'. If I put my hand on a woman's stomach or ass and there's flab there, it's a huge turn off. Cottage cheese is a big, red stoplight. I couldn't be with anyone who is obese.

 

Height is irrelevant. I've dated women from 5'0" to 5'9" and I find little difference is their level of attractiveness. If pushed, I'd say taller is better but that may be 'cause my current gf is 5'9" and I'm addicted to her body.

 

Petite or slender is definitely good, too. There just has to be some curves/femininity to her body. I'm not attracted to women who are too skinny. As I say, I don't like to date someone with the body of a 12 year-old boy.

 

I've become very picky over the past little while and only date women who are physically active and in shape.

 

Finally, I love dating dancers. They have a strong core and great Kegels which equals amazing sex (usually).

 

So ladies, do your daily Kegel exercises.

[Leigh 87]

Phil -THANKS for your opinion! I think the answer to my post is common sense stuff; the harder I work on my body, the better it will be.

 

It is a matter of what I am prepared to put in, and if I have to go through varying degrees of suffering, to look a certain way. For me, It would nto be worth it, and would make me a lesser person to be around, if I had to eat little and do exsercises I hated, to look a certain way.

 

forunately, I am able to eat what food groups I want, and eat at least 2000 cals a day, and do not have to worry about going hungry to stay my weight. I am also fortunate, in that I have learnt to find physical activitiers that I enjoy enough to sustain for the rest of my life, so I am not forcing myself to do things I hate, to attain a certain body.

 

So, being miserable and unhappy in order to look perfect would significantly take away from a womens over all energy and persona.

 

Then again, If I can be this weight through not really working out intensly, and mostly doing lots os Pilates ( INCLUDING kegels i think!), then I think to myself " geesz Leigh, imagine the bodfy u could havwe if you threw in 2 -3 sweat, vigorous cardio sessions per week, in addition to Pilates".

 

I do enjoy some cardio, boxing, and stuff if in the right mood. That was I can continue to eat the same, but still tone up and lose weight throguh execising slightly more.

[SpanksTheMonkey]

Don't encourage. There's a disorder related to eating disorders, and it's exercise addiction. Both this and ED are linked to OCD. There is nothing "healthy" or "attractive" about making yourself look like this chick, where your body fat percentage is so low that your body cannot produce estrogen to ovulate/menstruate, among other crippling side effects. The last thing these ladies need is to have another compulsion suggested to them.

 

I'm sorry I have to ask if that is even a female?

[stillafool]

HONESTLY: What sized girls do guys prefer?

 

We would have to ask every man in the world this question. Different men like different types of bodies, so I guess it would depend on what body type the guy you want likes.

[SpanksTheMonkey]

 

So ladies, do your daily Kegel exercises.

 

I enjoy a good bowl of Kellogg's dose that count?

[Philetus]

I enjoy a good bowl of Kellogg's dose that count?

 

Sure, while you eat just clench and release.

 

I have a friend who does her kegels while she drives to work.

 

I do mine while sitting at a computer. Yes boys, you can do Kegel exercises, too.

[lso802]

I was recently attracted to a girl who was probably 5'3-5'5. Not sure about how much she weighed. Couldn't be more than 120lbs. In my opinion, she wasn't well endowed in the chest or butt area. Since she probably exercises and does weights (girl's got abs), it firmed those areas up and made it look real nice. IMO, she pretty much worked with what she had. Gorgeous legs. Oh man. Beautiful long wavy hair.

 

I'm not really into girls who are too thin either. There are a lot of attractive girls on my campus. It really depends on the whole package. Not just looks to make me want to get romantic with them.

[Bogo123]

I like my girls thick from the waist down, but slim up top. Nice curvy ass hips and thighs. I would prefer a slightly chubby girl over a skinny girl. But I know im not in the majority as most of my friends prefer slim girls.

[allina]

I don't think this is a positive conversation for someone recovering from an eating disorder to be having. The people confirming that 5'5 and 115 is perfect should really think about what they are saying and to who. Lets use our heads people.

 

Also, women lie about their size/weight so much that men have absolutely no clue what 115lb woman looks like.

[K'aycie]

I'm not as strict with my diet and I used to work out all the time, BMI used to be around 19.5, but now at 22.

 

During the week, I eat raw veggies, mixed nuts, fruit and slices of whole meats with a flew slices of low fat cheese and salads, not just to manage my weight but it's healthier eating and I like to have a regular, good digestive system.

 

On the weekends, is my time off.

[sagetalk]

During the week, I eat raw veggies, mixed nuts, fruit and slices of whole meats with a flew slices of low fat cheese and salads, not just to manage my weight but it's healthier eating and I like to have a regular, good digestive system.

 

On behalf of men everywhere, thank you .

[BS76]

More info:

 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/science-news/7965211/Women-with-hourglass-figures-and-perfect-waists-most-attractive-study-finds.html

 

Researchers found a woman having an “hourglass” shaped figure was more important for a man than her breast size or facial features. They also discovered that men take a split second to decide if a member of the opposite sex is attractive.

 

A new study found that a man was more attracted to a woman based on the size of her waist compared with her hips.

 

They calculated that a “waist-to-hip ratio” of 0.7, or a waist measuring 70 per cent of the hip circumference, was the “perfect” size.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1539035/Men-lust-for-hourglass-curves-say-researchers.html (Notice this is from 2007)

 

Modern science has helped to reveal why. An hourglass shape in women is associated with relatively high levels of the hormone oestrogen.

 

Since oestrogen levels influence fertility, men seeking to pass their genes to the next generation would do well to pick hourglass-shaped women.

 

As a corollary, a sizeable belly is reliably linked to decreased oestrogen, reduced fecundity and increased risk for major diseases by research conducted over the past decade.

 

Obesity is also a key predictor of cardiovascular disorders, diabetes II, various cancers (breast, ovarian and endometrial) and gall bladder disease.

 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1561306/Jessica-Alba-has-the-perfect-wiggle-study-says.html

 

The academics found that it is the ratio between hips and waist that puts the sway into a woman's walk - and the nearer that ratio is to 0.7, the better.

 

This ratio provides the body with the right torso strength to produce a more angular swing and bounce to the hips during the walking motion.

Therefore, a woman with a 25in waist and 36in hips would have just the right proportions to carry off a sexy swagger as she walks.

Edited August 28, 2010 by BS76

[NYCGirly]

OP- It shouldn't matter much what men prefer. What the heck do YOU prefer? It amazes me how many women will starve themselves to fit the unrealistic "beauty" standards thrust upon them by people who have beer guts. OP just maintain a healthy lifestyle. Whatever your body does with that healthy eating is whatever your body does.

 

I'm somewhat more dense than a few of my female friends only because I used to train hard in the gym for two years (heavy lifting, protein shakes, etc). I decided to stop because I felt like I was losing my female physique. Unfortunately that a bit of that density is still with me even though I don't work out as hard (I'm running a lot now to slim down) so I look a bit more "thick" than teeny tiny girls but I'm rather healthy in my eating. Point is, every persons body is different- I will never be a size 1 or weigh 115lbs and I don't care- if some guys are deluded enough to think that's the global standard of beauty then you don't need to be with those idiots.

[BS76]

OP- It shouldn't matter much what men prefer.

 

Yes it does if she wants them to find her attractive. What men find attractive is a very instinctive thing, as the links above have shown.

 

What the heck do YOU prefer? It amazes me how many women will starve themselves to fit the unrealistic "beauty" standards thrust upon them by people who have beer guts. OP just maintain a healthy lifestyle. Whatever your body does with that healthy eating is whatever your body does.

 

What's unrealistic is denying human nature and deluding yourself into thinking that being fat and/or ugly is "empowerment" and that guys who aren't attracted to you are somehow the ones at fault. If this is hurtful, well, tough. The truth hurts sometimes and often doesn't match up with politically correct fantasies feminists have forced upon our society.

 

The good news is that you can do something about improving your looks nowadays. We have the knowledge available on how to get into shape and we have the technology to help reshape the human body to be more attractive. The question is how much time, effort, and money are you willing to put into your body. From what I've seen, people are just lazy and would rather bury their head in the sand, blame others, and shirk any personal responsibility for their situation rather than put in the blood, sweat, and tears to make positive changes in their lives. Women are particularly bad about this when it comes to relationships.

 

If you're happy being a sloth sitting on the couch 8 hours a day, then more power to you. But don't come crying when you can't find a quality guy and men are consistently interested in your thin friend who happens to be a lot less bubbly and not as sweet as you are. Looks get the man, personality keeps him--NOT the other way around. Accept it and move on. We'll all be better off for it in the long run.

 

To the OP, your body isn't your problem. At your height and weight you'll see better returns on improving other aspects of yourself.

[K'aycie]

On behalf of men everywhere, thank you .

 

lol, I think the manufacturer of Lysol thanks me too.

[Knittress]

Even with a BMI of 25 it's not like the men are chasing me off with pitchforks...

[NYCGirly]

Yes it does if she wants them to find her attractive. What men find attractive is a very instinctive thing, as the links above have shown.

 

 

 

What's unrealistic is denying human nature and deluding yourself into thinking that being fat and/or ugly is "empowerment" and that guys who aren't attracted to you are somehow the ones at fault. If this is hurtful, well, tough. The truth hurts sometimes and often doesn't match up with politically correct fantasies feminists have forced upon our society.

 

The good news is that you can do something about improving your looks nowadays. We have the knowledge available on how to get into shape and we have the technology to help reshape the human body to be more attractive. The question is how much time, effort, and money are you willing to put into your body. From what I've seen, people are just lazy and would rather bury their head in the sand, blame others, and shirk any personal responsibility for their situation rather than put in the blood, sweat, and tears to make positive changes in their lives. Women are particularly bad about this when it comes to relationships.

 

If you're happy being a sloth sitting on the couch 8 hours a day, then more power to you. But don't come crying when you can't find a quality guy and men are consistently interested in your thin friend who happens to be a lot less bubbly and not as sweet as you are. Looks get the man, personality keeps him--NOT the other way around. Accept it and move on. We'll all be better off for it in the long run.

 

To the OP, your body isn't your problem. At your height and weight you'll see better returns on improving other aspects of yourself.

 

Not sure if all of this was in response to my post but I'll say this- No where in my post did I state that being fat and lazy was a good thing and if the guy doesn't like it, who cares. I advocated a HEALTHY lifestyle and whatever your body does with that healthy lifestyle is whatever your body does. You have too many women choosing UNHEALTHY ways of attaining a body that is not natural to them based on threads like these where women are trying to gain the attraction of men who, more likely than not, are sporting love handles and double chins- that's the beauty of anonymous message boards, you can spout off all of these unrealistic ideals and not have to meet any of them yourself. That's utter craziness and it's damaging for some people who come online an read those things.

 

After living a healthy lifestyle it's all about being happy with what your body is because there are people out there that will appreciate it even if it doesn't match up to the Maxim models that men ogle over.

[that girl]

Leigh, you're recovering from an eating disorder. The fact that you look at your healthy weight and say "If I just lose 5 pounds, I'll be good" suggests that your eating disorder is still a problem.

 

You need to talk to your therapist.

 

Too many people here are talking about ideal sizes and worse bitching about "lazy" women who they think weigh too much. Leigh has a medical problem, I don't think this is helping her.

[Engadget]

Usually I prefer shorter, thicker girls. My girlfriend now is a little thick but only an inch or two shorter than me, and in fact it works much better sexually that way. Short girls can present a logistical challenge.

[azhure]

Congratulations on your unbelievable progress. I can’t express how courageous you are, especially given that you went it alone. And I’m so glad you’re seeking help now.

 

azhure - Thanks so much for your heart felt response. I had anorexia about 4 - 5 yrs ago at 18, but I never dropped below about 44 kilos, so physically I never got too bad. I was anroexic for not too long, no more than 1 year.

 

I did not get professional help and gained on my own, but then relapsed; I gained again, and for the past 2 years I have been stable at 50 - 52 kilos.

 

I look reletively healthy at 52 kilos though. I was no longer anorexic, but I still had an eatinfg disorder. I ate a maintenance amount, and liked my body, but there was still something not quiet right.

 

So, in the past 2 mnths, I decdied to gain to BMI 20, for the first time in 3 or more years. I ate 2500 cals a day up until last week.

 

I HAVE develope a strong sense of self cos of the ED, as I learnt that I would NEVER be happy through my body alone. It was never good enough for me any ways, my body....

 

I do not have a treatment team. I have only juststarted to see a therapist, to help deal with my social isolation.

 

I do get looked at more now that I am BMI 20 ish. My body type is fine where it is lol, I am plenty curvy, and do not need to gain more. I would actually rather die. So the intense fear of fat is still very much alive.

 

But at least I eat normal amounts, and look and feel physicually normal and healthy.

 

Please realise that this in itself is a massive dilemma, and an indication that you’re still affected by your ED. I don’t say this to minimise your experiences, but please trust me because I’ve been there. By your own admission you still have an intense fear of fat, and would rather ‘die’ than gain (I’m not saying you need to gain, that’s not my place). I too lost my weight when I was 18, and had regained it by the age of 20. I’m now 23. I also remember struggling with the amount of weight I lost, believing that just because I wasn’t 25kgs like a fellow ED sufferer in a treatment centre, my ED wasn’t worthy of consideration, or could be dismissed. There’s no such thing as a lesser ED – whether you had lost 30 kgs or 3 kgs makes no difference. The fact remains that your health derailed as a consequence of a severe psychiatric illness. I will continue to say it until the cows come home – you are so much more than what your body image dictates. Even if you were, hypothetically speaking, overweight, and were consistently working on your issues FOR YOU, not for the purposes of attraction or anything else, I’d tell you that you that you were perfect just the way you were. Note I’m not advocating the ‘laziness’ and ‘sloth’ dismissed so ardently by BS76. I’m merely saying that we should all embrace a healthy lifestyle and be satisfied with how our bodies respond, even if they don’t strictly adhere to the ‘perfection’ propounded by the media, or personal preferences expressed on this board.

 

@ BS76

I don’t mean any disrespect, but this really isn’t constructive for someone who has an ED. Yes, I know she probably shouldn’t be posting on this board to begin with, but understand that comments like these are unbelievably triggering and undervaluing. My point is, despite ‘human nature’ supposedly dictating otherwise, all she does – indeed this is applicable to women and men alike – must be for herself primarily. For someone with an ED, who’s been (and still is) preoccupied with others’ conceptions of her, it needs to be reaffirmed over and over that so long as she embraces a healthy lifestyle (unprocessed foods and moderate gym/dance sessions coupled with increased socialisation sound great) it is of no consequence where her body goes. So unless you want to secure her fate and contribute to another relapse, please reassess the suitability of your comments. I’m all for free speech, and if this is what you believe then you’re entitled to post in usual circumstances. But in this instance, please have some compassion and realise that comments such as these exacerbate her predicament. As I said before, this thread shouldn’t exist to begin with, but now that it does, let’s all try to exercise some forethought.

 

@ Allina, NYCGirly, that girl

I second all of this.

[kalikula]

From reading this thread it sounds like you are just obsessing more and more about your body...

 

If you project happiness and do things that make you happy, hang out with your friends, etc., then you will attract guys. Guys want to hang out with someone who is fun to be with and confident, not just someone who constantly obsesses over how they look.

 

It sounds like you don't understand how girls who are heavier than you are getting into relationships.. Guys are attracted to different body physiques.. Yes all guys like girls with healthy bodies but still, there is more to someone than just how they look, ie personality, social life, interests, etc. You should work on your self confidence and get some interests that allow you to think about other things.

 

I don't think this is a positive conversation for someone recovering from an eating disorder to be having. The people confirming that 5'5 and 115 is perfect should really think about what they are saying and to who. Lets use our heads people.

 

I agree, this doesn't really seem like a healthy thread to me.

[D-Lish]

I will take a pic soon, but OKAY: I just want the truth about what guys find PHYSICALLY desirable in a women........... WHAT makes you want to get PHYSICAL with her?

 

 

Don't go there with posting a pic L. If it's external validation you need, you're not heading in the right direction. You might get 50 positive responses, but all it takes is for one person to say something that doesn't sit well with you and you could spiral back into a bad place.

 

5'5" and 116 lbs is small, and who cares if others approve or not. Don't focus on seeking outside approval.

 

Being anorexic is like being an alcoholic- you're always going to be one. It's as much a state of mind as it is a physical condition. I know because I suffer from it. I'm 5'7" and starved myself down to 105lbs- and still wanted to lose more. Negative comments from others like "eat a sandwich" or "bonerack" were positive to me at one time. Conversely, when I went back to 120lbs- people started telling me I looked "healthy"- I equated "healthy" with "fat".

 

It's all about being comfy in your own skin. Don't set yourself up for a backslide by asking people to rate your picture. Validation should be internal- not external.

[Leigh 87]

After having a disordered eating and body image problem, I just like talking about what appeals to men. I want to know the truth from a vartity of people. Because peoples preferences differ.

 

I know that looks is what attracts men to look at you to begin with, but then personality and the rest of it will either make or break any sort of romantic relationship.

 

 

I know it is more about your looks, however, it is your looks that attract the met and get their attention. Although in other situations, when they talk to you and get to know you, they may not be initially attracted to you physically, but become more interested in you through gettingt o know you.

 

I guess I was asking about notonly the type of women that GETS mens attention,and what they naturally NOTICE to begin with ( on first site), but also if guys sometimes fall for a girl who they did NOT feel attraction towards at first site, and who they BECAME inerested in AFTER talking to them.

 

And I will only be 115 lbs if my body naturally goes there, by the way. I will simply eat when hungry, do the rigth thing, get glowing, clear skin, and be healthy. And as the POSTER said - if I do the right things, my body wil do what my body will do.

 

I did eat 2500 cals to gain to 120 lbs, at 5 '5, so now that I am eating only when hungry and eating more nornmal amounts, I am interested to c wher my body goes.

[Green]

I like women who are atleast 5'7 tall and are thin wich usualy means 115lbs. Really I don't care if a girl has a little meat on her butt or hips but when a girl starts to look pregnant and then go beyond looking pregnant and get fat in the face I really get grossed out.