PrettyPoppy Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Well then I am absolutely baffled as to what you referred to as a legitimate gripe regarding proposals. Again, sounds pretty painful for you both. I'm not invalidating the hurt you experienced, just trying to offer you some options that are not based on just pigeonholing either of you as wrong. Six years is good bit of time. You were at the junction of proposing, she wanted to marry. So what happened (aka what was the subtext you both were reading in the other) ? If you said she was off with Joe the carpenter, smoking crack or some other thing, my response would be run to NC. But seemingly something tumbled down a hill just as it was being ascended. I think in your heart you can find what is best for you. Obviously this was a relationship that mattered to you both. Breaking up is not easy for either person in these sorts of situations. Sometimes though, it is the wise thing to do, only the pair of you know that answer.
Author Pbr1986 Posted August 26, 2010 Author Posted August 26, 2010 Well then I am absolutely baffled as to what you referred to as a legitimate gripe regarding proposals. Again, sounds pretty painful for you both. I'm not invalidating the hurt you experienced, just trying to offer you some options that are not based on just pigeonholing either of you as wrong. Six years is good bit of time. You were at the junction of proposing, she wanted to marry. So what happened (aka what was the subtext you both were reading in the other) ? If you said she was off with Joe the carpenter, smoking crack or some other thing, my response would be run to NC. But seemingly something tumbled down a hill just as it was being ascended. I think in your heart you can find what is best for you. Obviously this was a relationship that mattered to you both. Breaking up is not easy for either person in these sorts of situations. Sometimes though, it is the wise thing to do, only the pair of you know that answer. Yes, it's a very tough situation. I can see why she thought I could be dragging my feet but at the same time listen to me and believe what I say. If I say we are going to get married then we will. You seem to have a lot of experience with these sort of things. Are you a Dr. of some sorts or just have a lot of relationship experience?
boltsfan17 Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 I know most people will advocate going no contact, but in your situation, I think maybe you two need to sit down and talk about things. Looking at things through her shoes, it sounds like she did give up on you and probably thought you would never propose, even though you have been talking about it for years. At the same time, she could have been a little more understanding if you had to take care of things before you got her the ring. I just think you should call her and ask if you two could meet up to talk. You both need to really lay your feelings out on the table and see if it's something you both can work through or see if it's best the both of you move on.
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