smk Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 So a lot of people here know my story and as you can tell from my post count I have done a lot of posting on here in the past 10 weeks… When I first joined LS I was your stereotypical heartbroken person like a lot of here… I made every mistake in the book from attempting to be “friends” through to not doing NC and even drinking every night to even sending the drunken text and even phoning her up – thankfully she never answered because then I would have made an absolute tit of myself… About 5 weeks into the break up I started listening to the advice I got here, and yes I have fallen several times after that, however I realised that I wanted to move on, that I didn’t want to be stuck at that point for the rest of my life, and I started looking at me and what I could do for myself. I discovered several things about life and began the process of self-healing and I consciously and truly wanted to become a better person, and so I put the wheels in motion and began my journey. I should tell you that it’s been just over a week since I have implemented complete NC and even asked her to stop making contact with me, and in that past 10 days I have done things that I would never have done before, I went out and made some new friends, I got out of my comfort zone effectively. Over the last 96 hours I have gone out and met 4 extremely beautiful women, not because I wanted anything with them or from them, but more so as a confidence booster to myself. I had my friends pick out 4 women that they thought were unobtainable and I came back with 4 numbers, and all 4 have already contacted me without me having to do anything…the confidence boost that this has given me is phenomenal. I know I am not even close to have fully moved on or being fully healed from this wound, but as each day passes I get there a little bit more. I guess what I am trying to say here, is that until I made the decision to pick myself up and move on, I wasn’t going anywhere, and I wont lie to you, it wasn’t easy getting to that point, when I did finally do it, I felt that I was giving up hope, but in truth I wasn’t, I was simply choosing to continue living my life. I still care about and love her deeply, no one, not even she can take that away from me... Things do get better, we have to want them to get better before anything happens though, so be brave and take that next step to living your life and trust me when you do, you will feel so much better… always remember one thing “The only person worth your tears will never make you cry” – go out there, become a stronger better person, accept that its ok to let go of the past it wont mean that you have stopped loving them any more or less, it will simply show that you love yourself more which is what’s the most important thing… 1
HopeLove Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 Great post. I'm happy for you, as for myself right now I feel like I don't even have the strengh anymore to move on. Tomorrow I shall feel better!
Author smk Posted August 23, 2010 Author Posted August 23, 2010 Great post. I'm happy for you, as for myself right now I feel like I don't even have the strengh anymore to move on. Tomorrow I shall feel better! Hope be strong you will get there... I am having a pretty rough evening after that post today, I just can't seem to stop thinking of her again this evening - went to the therapist and then all of a sudden she popped into my head and I just can't get her out... For some reason I just really miss her and wish I could just be with her right now...
LostInTurn Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 I am having a pretty rough evening after that post today, I just can't seem to stop thinking of her again this evening - went to the therapist and then all of a sudden she popped into my head and I just can't get her out... For some reason I just really miss her and wish I could just be with her right now... It's ok. It happens. You may miss someone and wish you could be with them right now. But, look inside you. Think about all the hurt. Would you really want to be with that person right now? Would that make you happy infinitely? We all go through it. I am as I type this response, but I know me. I know I had days when I wanted out of the relationship even though I didn't walk away. Shame on me for not doing so. Wish I had! I'm trying to look inside myself and remember how miserable I've been and all the BS I've dealt with.
Div Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 You are an inspiration to everyone else going through the same thing. Don't worry about the rollercoaster of emotions. Some days you'l feel like **** but every day that you continue working on yourself the bad days will get less and less.
Thorgs Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 smk, dude...you are on the slow climb to inner happiness. Keep on goin'! btw get this...I just flew out to Las Vegas because I was going out of my mind just sitting at home all the time since I didn't have work for 2 1/2 weeks. 15 minutes after I touch down I get a call...yep, from the ex! I ignored it though. I bet her new bf was working that night and she was bored...or maybe she wanted to tell me she gave me herpes or something. Oh well, I'll never know because I don't care! Yes, I still love her but it's time to let go because of what she did to me. Immediately after she called the Hinder song popped into my head though..."It's funny that you're calling me tonight. And, yes I've dreamt of you too. Does he know you're talking to me? Will it start a fight? No I don't think she has a clue. Well, my girl's in the next room, sometimes I wish she was you. I guess we never really moved on..." Keep that positive vibe bro and good things will gravitate to you!
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