warup89 Posted August 21, 2010 Posted August 21, 2010 Well, guys...im posting this because i need to vent this long and painful situation that I've been going trough [3 yrs now] and well get some advice down the road. Best friend1 was going out with this girl for a couple of days, till i finally met her, that day I looked into her eyes and i just sank down into this trance of feelings, but quickly came back up and realized "lucky bastard, oh well good for him" knowing my best friend1. I knew that it was not going to last long, and for my best friend1 this was just some other girl. That day came, and really bad, not only they broke up, but she was also having family problems, she and like any other person, started doing started making the wrong choices just to forget about the crappy situation she was in, so i started talking to her and we ended up trading screen names, and started chatting a lot. For the most part i just gave her advice and just talked for hours into the night. She really listened to me, and she even ended broking up with this rebound guy that was douche bag, because i told her...that he as just lusty douche bag. Anyhow, throughout the weeks we clicked really well, and decided to hang out, me and her didnt have cars so I told my best friend2 to come along, since that guy has everything, including a big SUV. After we started to hang out, everyone thought we were a couple since we were together the whole time and enjoyed every minute of it and I felt it was time for me to ask her, but had to clear it with best friend1, I did later on and he didn't mind of course. The only thing holding me back was my insecurity and shyness. Finally i came in to conclussion that i had to do it, but then Jo [the girl] got into the big argument with her abusive dad and was getting kicked out. I wanted to offer her my place, but I literally had no room, and then i remembered that best friend2 was living in his uncle's house that had free rooms. So I asked him and he didnt mind. This is were it starts going south for me...Best friend2 is a nice guy but he is the most spoiled person ever, and he never had a GF before, and his uncle wanted to change that. In the time being, I got a great job, but it meant that i couldnt be around as much anymore. While I was away, best friend2's uncle took him and Jo to all this really nice places, while of course saying little jokes like "you guys should just go out and get it over with". I know this because his uncle tried to fix him with other girls before...Then after a long day of work and a mild smile waiting to see Jo, I see both of them coming out of the door hugging....man talk about an emotional punch in the gut. Well....I was pissed at my best friend2 but not too pissed since i never made it clear to him that i like her. Time passed and i got used to their relationship, by focusing on work, school, etc. every once in a while, me and Jo will look into each others eyes, and knew what we were both thinking. Her and best friend2 move to his uncle's second house in another state and well disappeared for almost 3 yrs, they came back after that time, and Jo and me started talking a bit more. On 09 new year's night best friend2 felt sick and couldn't go out, so Jo, 2 other friends and me went out to celebrate, and ended up drunkish in this one park, we were all playing around, until me and Jo were alone by chance, and I finally told her what I felt for her back then, and she told me she felt the same...trough the whole night we both were laying down glazing at the stars talking and holding each other, and she explain that she was pretty much forced to go out with my best friend2 and they still together now because she just doesnt know were to go. I wanted to offer, but i dont wanna be a dick and steal my best friend's GF....time passed the sun started rising, and we both just hugged as hard as we could, Jo cried a little bit and I just had my eyes closed trying to remember every micro second of it. We both didnt kiss due to respect to my friend, and well because of the other two friends that were there...although drunk. I will never forget that night, because it was when everything was cleared out between me and her.... She always admired me because I always earned what I have and I climbed from the poverty that i was in before to what Iam now. My friend in the other hand, is like i said before, spoiled and doesnt have any kind of aspirations except for smoking weed. trough out the time me and her saw each other very seldomly and normally when me, her and her bf were together. Its been lika that for a while, and I just decided to start fresh and forget about all of this, so I joined the military and chose a job that will take me far away for the next 4 yrs. I called her a couple of days ago to tell her they news, so after work we both met some coffee place and talked for a while. Before I got the chance to tell her what I did, she told how she is growing sick of my friend, how he is starting to be unfaithful to her, and well that their relationship might come to an end. She kept on going for almost an hour and cried a bit, then she asked me what i wanted to tell her, I told her, and she just hugged me put her head on my chest and with a very broken up voice told me "im so proud of you". I just didnt felt anything. I will deploy soon and even though i had enough of this, she's still in my mind & heart...Im just going to let life takes its course and await what the future holds for me.
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