Thierro Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 So, time does heal. I wish it would go a bit faster, but I can’t complain. I stopped being a complete wreck like I was 2 months ago. I still have my thoughts that hold on to her, sometimes I get stuck with them for a while. A couple of days ago I had a bad day. I started crying out of nowhere. It felt good. After that I started talking to my piano for half an hour. I pretended my ex was sitting there so I could tell her how I felt about everything that happened between the two of us. I also had a couple of dreams about her. We kissed, we cuddled etc... Oh well, my mind is giving it a place so I can move on. The small things keep reminding me of her and I still have the urge to contact her. Grey’s anatomy was her favorite show. A new season is starting on the 30th of august where I live. I thought about sending her a text; ‘Have fun with Grey’s.. Don’t text me back’. It’s funny, my mind is still playing with me just like an annoying little child that doesn’t get what he wants. I am done dating for a while, I’ll stop looking for a girl. It will take some time before I can let my ex go for good. A new girl will only feel like a replacement right now. I still have a hard time believing that I will meet a girl like my ex. But love isn’t a priority anymore. I have my own goals I need to achieve. Maybe I will love again, maybe not. As long as I am happy right this moment I will be just fine. I learned from the situation. I am proud of myself and I don’t feel any insecurities I initially suffered from. I had my flaws in the past relationship. I was trying my best. She wasn’t perfect either; she didn’t fight for us. She broke up with me by sending me a word document while we were talking on MSN. This tells me a lot about her. A side I never knew she had. My heart was in it from beginning to end, but hers wasn’t. She gave up and I am not going to be a victim here. She gave up on something beautiful. Maybe she will realize this one day, maybe she doesn’t. I hope not so she can be happy with the new guy. I gave all I had, it’s a shame that that wasn’t enough. I had a good time though..
LostInTurn Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 So, time does heal. I wish it would go a bit faster, but I can’t complain. I stopped being a complete wreck like I was 2 months ago. I still have my thoughts that hold on to her, sometimes I get stuck with them for a while. A couple of days ago I had a bad day. I started crying out of nowhere. It felt good. After that I started talking to my piano for half an hour. I pretended my ex was sitting there so I could tell her how I felt about everything that happened between the two of us. I also had a couple of dreams about her. We kissed, we cuddled etc... Oh well, my mind is giving it a place so I can move on. The small things keep reminding me of her and I still have the urge to contact her. Grey’s anatomy was her favorite show. A new season is starting on the 30th of august where I live. I thought about sending her a text; ‘Have fun with Grey’s.. Don’t text me back’. It’s funny, my mind is still playing with me just like an annoying little child that doesn’t get what he wants. I am done dating for a while, I’ll stop looking for a girl. It will take some time before I can let my ex go for good. A new girl will only feel like a replacement right now. I still have a hard time believing that I will meet a girl like my ex. But love isn’t a priority anymore. I have my own goals I need to achieve. Maybe I will love again, maybe not. As long as I am happy right this moment I will be just fine. I learned from the situation. I am proud of myself and I don’t feel any insecurities I initially suffered from. I had my flaws in the past relationship. I was trying my best. She wasn’t perfect either; she didn’t fight for us. She broke up with me by sending me a word document while we were talking on MSN. This tells me a lot about her. A side I never knew she had. My heart was in it from beginning to end, but hers wasn’t. She gave up and I am not going to be a victim here. She gave up on something beautiful. Maybe she will realize this one day, maybe she doesn’t. I hope not so she can be happy with the new guy. I gave all I had, it’s a shame that that wasn’t enough. I had a good time though.. Your words read like my thoughts. Only replace Grey's Anatomy with Dave Matthews. I think every time I put music on Dave Matthews is playing. I swear, the past couple days the media was out to get me because literally every damn station was playing some stupid Dave Matthew's song! I hope it gets easier for you soon.
Author Thierro Posted August 19, 2010 Author Posted August 19, 2010 Thanks. I banned music from my life. Especially the radio stations. Try some uplifting music or music that doesn't involve love. It will only hold you back.
deux ex machina Posted August 20, 2010 Posted August 20, 2010 (edited) About music? For myself, for a time it was strictly podcasts, talk, stuff like that. I like the idea of uplifting music. --------- Time does heal... Having those bad days can be disconcerting, how they seem to come out of nowhere, but it really sounds like you went with it well. I can relate to so much of your update; in particular, the part about learning from it. You seem very fair-minded, even though it's clear this has been difficult. As long as I am happy right this moment I will be just fine. I feel the same. Edited August 20, 2010 by deux ex machina
LostInTurn Posted August 20, 2010 Posted August 20, 2010 Thanks. I banned music from my life. Especially the radio stations. Try some uplifting music or music that doesn't involve love. It will only hold you back. I will only listen to certain cds now. The other night (I posted a thread about this which was why I called) television was out to get me. Literally every station. I was at a friends; otherwise I probably would have canceled cable. Haha! Thierro: Your responses to posts are incredible. You seem to be going through a tough time as well, but you're very rational. Thank you for that. We need inspiration here. It's amazing how we all come together to help one another.
LostInTurn Posted August 20, 2010 Posted August 20, 2010 She gave up on something beautiful. Maybe she will realize this one day, maybe she doesn’t. I'm a firm believer that they all realize at some point. Typically, when it's too late... for them. When you said she 'gave up something beautiful' that was touching. I believe my ex gave up something amazing. He would always tell me I was the most amazing person he'd ever met. I believe I was amazing and what we had was amazing. For awhile, I couldn't see this, but I know I was the rock in the relationship. It's so important that you haven't forgotten what the relationship was during the breakup. Many people do and it's too bad.
Author Thierro Posted August 20, 2010 Author Posted August 20, 2010 (edited) There is nothing we can do about it. I accept the things the way they are. The break-up was the best thing that could have happened to ME. We are now changing our fundamentals for a better relationship with ourselves. If I had a little magic wand, I would go back in time with the same knowledge I have now. But you know, this doesn’t change his or her perspective on things. They still have to learn from their own experience. Even if we did everything right, he or she would still end it. They haven’t learned enough to appreciate what they lost. Or they haven’t learned enough to know what fits their needs and shouldn’t have stringed us along with them. We were a lesson to them so they can figure out what they want in their next relationship. I am curious to know how we will cope with a new relationship. How can we trust the same feelings we will have for him/her? It doesn’t matter what she says to me, because I will always have the core believe that she has on foot out the door. Maybe that’s a good thing so we won’t feel so devastated when it ends as well. But we will also feel less for them than we did for our exes. It's something you need to learn to accept; good things end. Enjoy, but stay with both feet on the ground. Edited August 20, 2010 by Thierro
smk Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 So, time does heal. I wish it would go a bit faster, but I can’t complain. I stopped being a complete wreck like I was 2 months ago. I still have my thoughts that hold on to her, sometimes I get stuck with them for a while. A couple of days ago I had a bad day. I started crying out of nowhere. It felt good. After that I started talking to my piano for half an hour. I pretended my ex was sitting there so I could tell her how I felt about everything that happened between the two of us. I also had a couple of dreams about her. We kissed, we cuddled etc... Oh well, my mind is giving it a place so I can move on. The small things keep reminding me of her and I still have the urge to contact her. Grey’s anatomy was her favorite show. A new season is starting on the 30th of august where I live. I thought about sending her a text; ‘Have fun with Grey’s.. Don’t text me back’. It’s funny, my mind is still playing with me just like an annoying little child that doesn’t get what he wants. I am done dating for a while, I’ll stop looking for a girl. It will take some time before I can let my ex go for good. A new girl will only feel like a replacement right now. I still have a hard time believing that I will meet a girl like my ex. But love isn’t a priority anymore. I have my own goals I need to achieve. Maybe I will love again, maybe not. As long as I am happy right this moment I will be just fine. I learned from the situation. I am proud of myself and I don’t feel any insecurities I initially suffered from. I had my flaws in the past relationship. I was trying my best. She wasn’t perfect either; she didn’t fight for us. She broke up with me by sending me a word document while we were talking on MSN. This tells me a lot about her. A side I never knew she had. My heart was in it from beginning to end, but hers wasn’t. She gave up and I am not going to be a victim here. She gave up on something beautiful. Maybe she will realize this one day, maybe she doesn’t. I hope not so she can be happy with the new guy. I gave all I had, it’s a shame that that wasn’t enough. I had a good time though.. dude that is a brilliant post - both of us seem to be at the place and sometimes when I read yours posts its like you are me... I feel the same things here - yeah i do get the odd memory of hers when I see something we used to do or like but then I let it go... I love the fact that you acknowledge that you gave it your best and in the end she left so shes the loser here... Birlliant and keep going strong buddy - we will hurt now but we know we gave it our all and we wont have any regrets anymore...
HopeLove Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 I also share the belief that my realionship was during some time fantastic and I know I have fight for it but he did not and I can't change that. I hope we all will move on soon.
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