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the restorative powers of attention from another


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Posted

So it's been 16 days with NC after my bf of 3.5 years dumped me. I emailed him but he didn't email me back, but I also changed my cell phone number so that he can't call me, so I'm just going to pretend it's been straight NC.

 

Yesterday this guy who has had a thing for me for a while texted me some cute/flirtatious messages. I dig him back; i.e. I find him attractive and interesting.

 

So today I feel like... 50% better about the break up than I did a few days ago. This is good but also worries me, because I'm what you might call a "serial monogamist," and I know I should be single for a while.

 

But being said "serial monogamist" comes with the territory of being a hopeless romantic who falls into infatuation quite easily. So I'm trying to just play it cool and let myself heal before I get too interested in this other dude.

 

Does anyone else get a healing-high from getting attention from other people? I guess it's a self-esteem boost if nothing else. Or validation.. idk.

Posted
So it's been 16 days with NC after my bf of 3.5 years dumped me. I emailed him but he didn't email me back, but I also changed my cell phone number so that he can't call me, so I'm just going to pretend it's been straight NC.

 

Yesterday this guy who has had a thing for me for a while texted me some cute/flirtatious messages. I dig him back; i.e. I find him attractive and interesting.

 

So today I feel like... 50% better about the break up than I did a few days ago. This is good but also worries me, because I'm what you might call a "serial monogamist," and I know I should be single for a while.

 

But being said "serial monogamist" comes with the territory of being a hopeless romantic who falls into infatuation quite easily. So I'm trying to just play it cool and let myself heal before I get too interested in this other dude.

 

Does anyone else get a healing-high from getting attention from other people? I guess it's a self-esteem boost if nothing else. Or validation.. idk.

 

Yeah Shift it is not a good idea to get back into something so quick. You are definitely not healed from the previous b/u, and you need that time. This is a rebound, something to mask the pain you are feeling, but you need to feel that pain and learn from this situation so you don't end up back here.

 

You are looking for validation from someone else that you are a worthwhile person, you need to figure out how to get that from yourself....

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