commonlife Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Hi all, here is my story http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t240417/ but to make the long story short, I met this girl and we hooked up preety fast. She was still living with her ex but when he left the apratment, she started spending most of her time with him. We broke up 3 times in 2 months, getting back each time about a week later. On the last break up, I decided to go NC and forget about her. We eventually took contact and on the day we were suppose to just have a drink, we hooked up again... I thaught things were going on but she said she needed space and wanted us to take is slow, slow like we are not together but we see each other and see if things can work out. My question, is it a good strategy? Is it just a way to get me in the friend zone or can this work out? I am ready to loose here completely, there is a little voice in my head telling me to let go of everything as the situation has become ridiculous. Anyway, I care for her but am not hurting on her (this has finally gone away when I went in NC, so for you out there hurting, know that NC is the cure). You have it all Thanks
Not strong enough Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Run, please, the relationship had a mud foundation, just run please....
Author commonlife Posted August 16, 2010 Author Posted August 16, 2010 yes, you are probably right. I am "ok" with loosing her, so I guess I'll just go on with my life...
bboy Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 What the h***!! I just read your story. GET THE H**** AWAY FROM HER! I have female friends who've done what she's doing. There is no way that she will ever respect your boundaries if you let her do this. You either go and she follows and respects you. Or you go and she tries to toy around and you leave. Two outcomes and still only one action to make.
Author commonlife Posted August 16, 2010 Author Posted August 16, 2010 Yep, you are both right, it is no use to go her own way and in the end surely have nothing. Life goes on... Now is time to go to selfish mode and take care of myself , well it is what I have being doing these past weeks.
Author commonlife Posted August 17, 2010 Author Posted August 17, 2010 I'm running, I'm runnnnnniiiiinnnngggggg
Author commonlife Posted August 18, 2010 Author Posted August 18, 2010 this will be a dumb question, but... Should I just walk away or should I tell her that I am walking away? (pretty scary...)
boltsfan17 Posted August 18, 2010 Posted August 18, 2010 I wouldn't say anything to her. Just walk away and never look back.
Author commonlife Posted August 18, 2010 Author Posted August 18, 2010 Ok thanks, after all if she doesn't want the cool guy I am, sorry for her, other will want
Don Ho Posted August 18, 2010 Posted August 18, 2010 I wouldn't say anything to her. Just walk away and never look back. Bro, you NEVER tell them you're leaving, that you can't be friends or that you're doing NC. Just do it. Just remember for next time, DO NOT get involved with women that are living with an Ex, not done with the Ex, separated or married. Aside from that, this woman is a mess. Keep running and find one to chase you.
Author commonlife Posted August 18, 2010 Author Posted August 18, 2010 Yep Don Ho, these are wise words and it is my new rule. I met this girl a few days ago and I did the same checkliste. Now it is wait and see. I was confused because this other girl is really nice, in to the checklist, but it is a strange feeling to let go of someone. therefore I think that if she is as cool as I think, the letting go will be easy. To make thing short, I was wondering if I should date this new girl. i know it sounds dumb like this!!! Anyway I have made up my mind, you all have helped me, it is run don't look back and have one chase me (hopefully all will be done). Thank you, all of you :love: and wish me the best.
Don Ho Posted August 18, 2010 Posted August 18, 2010 Yep Don Ho, these are wise words and it is my new rule. I met this girl a few days ago and I did the same checkliste. Now it is wait and see. I was confused because this other girl is really nice, in to the checklist, but it is a strange feeling to let go of someone. therefore I think that if she is as cool as I think, the letting go will be easy. To make thing short, I was wondering if I should date this new girl. i know it sounds dumb like this!!! Anyway I have made up my mind, you all have helped me, it is run don't look back and have one chase me (hopefully all will be done). Thank you, all of you :love: and wish me the best. Funny how all that works. My Ex dumped me and that same week another woman dropped in my lap. Of course it is a strange feeling seeing someone new and wondering what to do. Yes! You should date this new girl and check her out and see what she's all about. NOW make sure you go SLOW this time. For the first month ONE date per week. NO texting more than 2 times a day (if at all). No phone conversations (use that just for your next date). NO sex. Believe me I know how difficult this is to do. That's why you have to have a life and be busy. If you don't go slow, you will end up in the same boat: dumped! Good luck bro.
Author commonlife Posted August 18, 2010 Author Posted August 18, 2010 Thanks, It's funny, a friend told me the same thing, no sexe. As for slow yes, I have learned my lesson. I will stick to the "plan" and see how it works out. One thing for sure, the first 2-3 signes of things i don't like, i am out of here...
Author commonlife Posted August 19, 2010 Author Posted August 19, 2010 By the way I love your sentence "Some day you will meet the RIGHT person and when you do you will forget about all the time and emotion you wasted on the WRONG person"
Don Ho Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 Tnx Common. That actually came from another member here on LS. Keep it in mind, great saying. Hang in there.
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