Pianoguy Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 We're now officially "on a break", and we've agreed to stay true to each other, but I can read the writing on the wall, as much as I'd like to deny it. We're 25, we still love each other, but she can't let go of the urge to literally travel all over the world (which helps her career), and it's simply impossible to follow her, economically and logistically. We may be apart for years, and with all that she's experienced abroad already, it's harder to relate to each other these days. I'm REALLY trying to get to where she is now so I can at least understand, even if everything falls apart anyway. It would be good for personal growth all the same. Everything felt so right with her, but I guess she changed. I don't know how to deal with this kind of loss, because I know I'll keep searching for someone exactly like her forever. How do I grow past that feeling?
mickleb Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Sorry - I haven't read any of your history. Who said it was 'a break'? Dangerous word, that. If she did, treat the relationship as though you two are over. If you choose to search your whole life for her doppelganger, that will be your choice but it will be a very unwise one. Heal from your loss bit by bit. Read a Susan Anderson book on the subject. Once you've healed, you will find you make a connection with other people, including women and will begin a relationship with one of those, at some point. She will be herself and you will like her for that. Don't worry about that now, you won't get there if you don't focus on what now's about. Sounds like now is about clarification. Are you over or together? If its the first one, you'll get a lot of advice on what to do here, if it's the second you'll need to ensure you're both on the same page, in agreement with how you will continue to work at this relationship. (If she is not interested in figuring this out, you have your answer to that question. Sadly, it's the one you don't want to hear today.) Get talking or not contacting but don't do both. x
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