ShannonMI Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 I joined a few days ago and posted a thread about my ex boyfriend and how he still wants to be friends and wanting to understand his intentions. I also have a question about some of his beliefs about love and relationships. Are they realistic? I, personally don't think so, but I need some more opinions. My ex seems to believe that a relationship shouldn't change over time. It should stay in the passionate, butterflies, giddy, super lovey dovey stage through out the entire relationship. The feelings you feel in the beginning, when you first meet are what I'm talking about. I tried to tell him that ALL relationships change with time. They evolve. You do feel those intense feelings in the beginning. Over time you grow to love each other, grow comfortable with each other and those intense "new relationship" feelings fade. It's not a bad thing by any means. After 8 years of being with my boyfriend, we moved on from those intense initial feelings to comfort and a deeper love and commitment. He wasn't happy with that. That is one of the reasons we broke up. He was missing those exciting feelings. I tried to tell him that his view on long term relationships was not realistic. Am I right? I even went as far as emailing him articles on the stages of love. Articles that proved what I was saying to him. He discounted them by saying not everyone's relationship changes. It's not like my ex and I weren't physically attracted to each other through out those 8 years we were together. We were. He's just looking for the super exciting feelings you feel with a new person. And he wants them to last forever. I say GOOD LUCK BUDDY! He'll always be searching. Every relationship waxes and wanes. It goes through stages. Please give me feedback on this topic! Have any of you experienced the type of relationship my ex is talking about? A never changing one? Thanks!
Pyro Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 Your ex is living in a fantasy land with unicorns and fairys. Sounds like an excuse to get out of a relationship.
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