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Posted (edited)

I love my Wife. I love my Child. I hate my day Job.

 

I struggled for years as a drummer and had a taste of success in

a few groups before I was married with a child. But i never quite PUSHED it, pushed the boundaries and saw what else I could get into to possibly make a living off the art i love so much. i love music so much.

 

took some years off and got married and had a child. Now I feel this

heavy burden of a job I can't stand, not enough money to buy a house but live comfy at least in an apartment, trying to provide for my family that i love and dreaming that I could possibly try it again, but as a singer/guitar player. To put all this emotion into song. To "try" and do something again, see if i could make this a job. I have songs, i have some ideas, i do have a voice, i have an inkling that i could take this all the way. i'm just scared.

 

What stands in my way? Not having TONS of time to do it, some but not much. Fear of failure because i've never done it before (i've always been Mr Drummer in the back), looking stupid, feeling old because i'm 34 now, not a young art punk anymore and basically a mixed up head...Afraid to feel like i'm wasting my time and should be doing something more respectable since i'm the provider.

 

I guess i worry too much about making wrong choices and with being head of my family, i worry even more. But whenever i hear Joe Strummer sing a song, it gives me so much hope

Edited by StreetDog
Posted

Being married means you have a partner. Someone who can help you try to make new goals a reality.

 

You sound a lot like my ex brother in law. Pretty much the same situation only with two kids and three ex wives. Seeing that he is at a more severe disadvantage than you, what he has done might be a good option for you; one you might even be better at doing.

 

He has become a songwriter. He still has a small group that does the occasional gig. The meat of his work however, is finding people who have the time, youth, and ambition he struggles with to get his music out there. He also records and mixes solo work of his own as well as the group who performs his work and outside bands. It has become profitable for him. He pads this income by doing freelance tech support and website management from his home. Because he is home, he doesn't need the expense of an everyday sitter either.

Posted

StreetDog, it can be done - even with the "restraints" you feel you have.

 

I'm a musician (singer/songwriter). A Wife. And I'm....older than you. And I joined a band last year after an extended time away from performing.

 

I love it. I have several children, all under age 10. I have significant restraints, but where there is a will (and LOTS of organization) - there's a way.

 

Don't get discouraged, and definitely don't see your spouse and child as a hinderance. They can be a great encouragement and support provided you don't abdicate your responsibilities to them.

  • Author
Posted

It's definitely different, when you get older and more responsible

 

I'm all about my family. But when I think about what i am, what

i used to be, what I've always loved, to not do it anymore, you

get that itch as i'm sure you did NoIDidn't. I admire you!! way to go

for the thing you love.

 

I have that same drive and love for it as i did when i was 18. I'm

always so optimistic. But when it comes to actually doing it, I feel

bad...like I should be spending every free moment I have with

Wife and Baby or at least getting paid for my time away from them.

 

But thank you for your posts...It's eased my mind a bit. I'm seeing that

yeah, i can do it and still take care of my family. I'm gonna try and go for

it and see what I can get into. Start small.

Posted
I love my Wife. I love my Child. I hate my day Job.

 

I struggled for years as a drummer and had a taste of success in

a few groups before I was married with a child. But i never quite PUSHED it, pushed the boundaries and saw what else I could get into to possibly make a living off the art i love so much. i love music so much.

 

took some years off and got married and had a child. Now I feel this

heavy burden of a job I can't stand, not enough money to buy a house but live comfy at least in an apartment, trying to provide for my family that i love and dreaming that I could possibly try it again, but as a singer/guitar player. To put all this emotion into song. To "try" and do something again, see if i could make this a job. I have songs, i have some ideas, i do have a voice, i have an inkling that i could take this all the way. i'm just scared.

 

What stands in my way? Not having TONS of time to do it, some but not much. Fear of failure because i've never done it before (i've always been Mr Drummer in the back), looking stupid, feeling old because i'm 34 now, not a young art punk anymore and basically a mixed up head...Afraid to feel like i'm wasting my time and should be doing something more respectable since i'm the provider.

 

I guess i worry too much about making wrong choices and with being head of my family, i worry even more. But whenever i hear Joe Strummer sing a song, it gives me so much hope

 

Congratulations. You're pretty normal. Maybe exceptional in some regards because you have talent and a drive to succeed at it. I have had two best friends with super talents but are so territorial about their musical work that they are unwilling to think that anyone could bring synergy to their stuff. Change, what me? They ensure their own obscurity. And unfortunately, the boat has kind of sailed on music in general--now it's all image and no baby boom like there used to be to snap up millions of 45's.

 

Btw, I was a big Clash fan and fan of Joe Strummer and the Mescaleros. Too bad he died so young. He really was a diamond in the rough. Good luck.

  • Author
Posted (edited)
Congratulations. You're pretty normal. Maybe exceptional in some regards because you have talent and a drive to succeed at it. I have had two best friends with super talents but are so territorial about their musical work that they are unwilling to think that anyone could bring synergy to their stuff. Change, what me? They ensure their own obscurity. And unfortunately, the boat has kind of sailed on music in general--now it's all image and no baby boom like there used to be to snap up millions of 45's.

 

Btw, I was a big Clash fan and fan of Joe Strummer and the Mescaleros. Too bad he died so young. He really was a diamond in the rough. Good luck.

 

thanks Frisk, agreed, Joe Strummer...there's no one like him. I'm

a big fan.

 

this song makes me sad every time:

Edited by StreetDog
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