jen_r Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 (edited) So for those of you who know my story, here's an update: Before I had gone on vacation last week, I stopped trying to contact my ex. And wouldn't you know - the tables turned and he was contacting me. I can't believe how typical that is. That NC thing works haha. Anyways, we met up the day after my BDay, he took me out for dinner & drinks - his idea! He was the sweet, kissy, hand-holding bf that I remembered. We talked a little about what had happened & what was going on, nothing got resolved though. He asked me to stay the night & yaddy yadda you know what that entails. But then - nothing. Back to one word replies, the selfishness surfaced, the @$$hole came back. So, I gave him an ultimatum - It's all or nothing. He wants things to happen naturally & not be rushed. My problem is that he is being a jerk while we aren't in each others faces, when I'm around him - he's a different person. Am I wrong to say 'all or nothing'? I mean, he thinks he can just keep me around at his own leisure and play with me when he wants? I dont think so. On a better note - I am doing unbelievably so much better. I think about him alot still, but I don't wonder what he's doing & I actually don't care what he's doing. I miss him, but I think I just miss the old him - the @$$hole he is being is making it harder for me to even remember how he used to be. I haven't cried for over 10 days, haven't even had the urge to. I picked up a book yesterday (haven't read in sooo long), and I'm indulging in it to keep my mind occupied & it's working. So, for those of you who are hurting - I WAS THERE! I was there BAD. I was in over my head with emotions I never knew exsisted and it got scary for a while. Maybe things do get better Edited August 10, 2010 by jen_r
Don Ho Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Good for you Jen! I don't know you past details, but obviously you have cleared your mind and you're less emotionally hung up on your Ex. I would assume you went NC after your one day reconciliation and perfect that he acted like an A-hole and you were able to focus on that. That is one strategy during NC and other LS members should also focus on their Ex's bad behavior and traits. Keep it goin and glad you're feeling better!
Lost Fish Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Good for you jen! I'm glad you have found your own independence again! The NC worked! You're able to see your ex for what he really was - and not some knight in shining armor. Stay strong and continue to be good to yourself.
Author jen_r Posted August 10, 2010 Author Posted August 10, 2010 Good for you Jen! I don't know you past details, but obviously you have cleared your mind and you're less emotionally hung up on your Ex. I would assume you went NC after your one day reconciliation and perfect that he acted like an A-hole and you were able to focus on that. That is one strategy during NC and other LS members should also focus on their Ex's bad behavior and traits. Keep it goin and glad you're feeling better! I started NC on the 29th. We had dinner on the 5th. It only took one day of NC for him to come running. It almost made me mad that it only took me not talking to him for him to contact me to see what was up - seems so egotistical. But yeah, I feel like my mind is finally able to THINK & make decisions! lol.
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