candie_boone Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 well, my boyfriend is cheating on me and i am in love with him i dont want to let him go. the other woman wants him to dump me. and she will do anything to make him dump me. i really love this guy and i want to get married to him. well how can i make him stay with me. he says he loves me but for some reason she is still in the picture. how can i win his heart? i cry'd all day for him and i want her out the picture. how can i make him love me. and how can i make him only want me. how do i win his heart =[ thanks for ur advise an comfort i really need it. Candie
Mombot Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 I think this belongs on the infidelity forum, as OM?OW are seeing married people, Though that doesn't make you pain hurt any less. You can't make anyone do anything, sometimes we all have to accept he's not that into you.
bentnotbroken Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 well, my boyfriend is cheating on me and i am in love with him i dont want to let him go. the other woman wants him to dump me. and she will do anything to make him dump me. i really love this guy and i want to get married to him. well how can i make him stay with me. he says he loves me but for some reason she is still in the picture. how can i win his heart? i cry'd all day for him and i want her out the picture. how can i make him love me. and how can i make him only want me. how do i win his heart =[ thanks for ur advise an comfort i really need it. Candie 1)you can't make someone love you 2)love doesn't disrespect you or cause you hurt purposely 3)you can't win the heart of someone who hasn't shown they have a heart. 4)he may very well want you, but it is clear by his actions that he wants her too. 5) why would you want to marry someone who has shown you they are capable of breaking your heart for their own selfish pleasure? Do you think marriage will change that. The commitment and love comes from the heart not from having a ceremony. Marriage isn't something to play with. What you want to have a couple of kids with him thinking that will bind him more tightly to you....not. 20 + years and 2 children didn't stop the cheating in my situation. 6)what's so great about this person? Can you depend on him to help you grow in the most healthy way or is he going to help you do anything and everything to ignore your needs and wants to fulfill his own? Does he make you feel loved and cherished? Does he make you feel protected from all threats to your relationship(inside and out)? 7)Where do you want to be in 5 years, 10 years, 15? Do you see the person he is right now, with you in that future?
Ellin Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 well, my boyfriend is cheating on me and i am in love with him i dont want to let him go. the other woman wants him to dump me. and she will do anything to make him dump me. i really love this guy and i want to get married to him. well how can i make him stay with me. he says he loves me but for some reason she is still in the picture. how can i win his heart? i cry'd all day for him and i want her out the picture. how can i make him love me. and how can i make him only want me. how do i win his heart =[ thanks for ur advise an comfort i really need it. Candie To give it your best shot show him what it's like to be without you. We often only appreciate something (or someone) when it's taken away from us. Don't make it clear to him any more how much you care. Let him know that you'll be ok without him and in fact there are many other guys who are just waiting to go out with you. Take the power into your own hands. All the best!
piscis Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Hi Candie Please read all over again what BNB has written to you specially: "why would you want to marry someone who has shown you they are capable of breaking your heart for their own selfish pleasure? Do you think marriage will change that. The commitment and love comes from the heart not from having a ceremony. Marriage isn't something to play with. What you want to have a couple of kids with him thinking that will bind him more tightly to you....not. 20 + years and 2 children didn't stop the cheating in my situation. " Please read lots of post here of stories of OW and on the infidelity forum of BS. You can see this situation as devastated (and it is awful of course) or as a huge opportunity because life, god, destiny or whatever you believe in showed you who he is and is saving you lots of tears in teh future. Cry, be mad, be sad, that is helpful but see him for what he is: a cheater, if he did not care now about how this will affect you and the R he wont care in the future. Keep posting
Owthathurts Posted August 11, 2010 Posted August 11, 2010 Run, get away. Cut off all contact. I am saying this from my own experience. You sound just like me when I got my now ex H back from another woman. My story goes this way, I met my ex H when I was 21, after a week of constant contact I moved in with him. We lived together for 3 1/2 years until I decided that I wanted to do things on my own and move out. I didn't want to break up, just have my independence. We decided that we would continue living/being together until our lease was up 4 months later. Well during these 4 months, I got the suspicion that he was cheating on me and found out by calling his phone while he was out and the OW answered. I was livid, I moved out that night. The next night, I saw the two of them together at a bar. I was so hurt, I still loved him, still wanted to be with him. I cried every minute of every day...wondering why he didn't love me. I made him come back to me, even though I knew he was still messing with the OW I wanted him so badly that I was willing to put up with it and I felt that eventually, he would drop her completely and come back to me. I got pregnant during this time. It was hell...I was alone, he was with another girl. I decided at that point to tell him to leave me alone if he couldn't leave her alone. He came back to me. We got married and we had 2 children. We were married for a total of 8 years, but the last 4 we lived separately. I believe that there are many reasons why MM cheat - not happy, wanting to leave the W, having an EA. But for a boyfriend to cheat, there is one reason - he doesn't want you right now. I know that is harsh, but I wish someone would have smacked me 8 years ago when I was going through the turmoil of my cheating boyfriend. I don't regret my children, but I do regret the 12 years of constant turmoil. When we separated (I left him), I finally realized that I was not in love with him and hadn't been since he broke my heart cheating on me with the other girl. I was unfair to him to marry him. I'm not saying your boyfriend is a bad person, I'm saying that you need to walk away. It's hard, your stomach will hurt, you'll probably lose wait, you'll cry all the time. Make plans with girlfriends, start exercising, don't be alone. One day you will get over it, I promise.
Author candie_boone Posted August 20, 2010 Author Posted August 20, 2010 thank you guys for helping me out. just earlier this week i left him and ran. i understand i can find another guy out there thank you for all ur help i really apreciate it
pureinheart Posted August 20, 2010 Posted August 20, 2010 well, my boyfriend is cheating on me and i am in love with him i dont want to let him go. the other woman wants him to dump me. and she will do anything to make him dump me. i really love this guy and i want to get married to him. well how can i make him stay with me. he says he loves me but for some reason she is still in the picture. how can i win his heart? i cry'd all day for him and i want her out the picture. how can i make him love me. and how can i make him only want me. how do i win his heart =[ thanks for ur advise an comfort i really need it. Candie Hugs Candie...Ellin is right, and I say it's not over till it's over....
Dexter Morgan Posted August 20, 2010 Posted August 20, 2010 well, my boyfriend is cheating on me and i am in love with him i dont want to let him go. the other woman wants him to dump me. and she will do anything to make him dump me. i really love this guy and i want to get married to him. ok, first off realize, I am completely on your side on this. that out of the way, are you out of your mind? Why would you want to marry a cheating SOB? You think marriage will make him lose his desire to bone another woman? there are plenty of good men out there...why settle for a cheating jerk? you deserve better. well how can i make him stay with me. he says he loves me but for some reason she is still in the picture. how can i win his heart? why are you fighting so hard for a turd? i cry'd all day for him and i want her out the picture. how can i make him love me. and how can i make him only want me. how do i win his heart =[ thanks for ur advise an comfort i really need it. Candie I think right now you are in a desperation phase of finding your your bf isn't worth a squat, you just don't see it yet because you are devestated. this is a man that isn't married to you, but likes having sex with other women. if you can handle the thought of that and can live with that, then its up to you. but what you really need to do is kick his sorry ass to the curb. He must be really good looking....because its the only thing I can see that would make a woman want to stay with a jackass like that.
Dexter Morgan Posted August 20, 2010 Posted August 20, 2010 thank you guys for helping me out. just earlier this week i left him and ran. i understand i can find another guy out there thank you for all ur help i really apreciate it good for you!!!! let the other woman have that piece of s##t. he'll be cheating on her sooner or later. what comes around goes around.
cavedweller Posted August 22, 2010 Posted August 22, 2010 candie, Get out of the relationship and move on..
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