Confused by my Ex, this time i'm asking for help!

[harleyone41]

Around Christmas time my ex girlfriend (20) and I (22) decided that we needed a break. We had dated for about 8 months. While we were on our "break", one of my friends saw her at a bar making out with some guy. I asked her about it a few days later and she said that she hadn't moved on, but he was just there to comfort her and she was drunk "he was just...there". She said that she was going to tell me that we should just stay apart. I realize now that we aren't really meant to be together right now since we are in different points in our lives, however, she has avoided me so much and i do miss her. The times i did call her she only spoke to me for only a few minutes then "had to go". So eventually i gave up trying to call her feeling rejected and unwanted. I talked to her for the first time yesterday online after about a month of no contact but once again i started it. I asked how she was, she answered with "ok" and then asked how i was. Once again then she had to go. Same old thing. I have heard about not contacting her for like 3-5 months to just get back our bearings. Is this true? When would it be a good time to ask her what went wrong? I have so many questions to ask her. Why is she giving me the cold shoulder? Why does she have to be with this new guy so soon? Ouch! Should i just ignore her and maybe she'll realize "he's not around anymore, maybe i messed up?" What do i do if i see her in that bar? What should i do? I need help!!

[carla]

I hate to break this to you but it sounds like time to move on. She has given you more then enough clues that she doesn't want this relationship. Saying that she needs a break is just a gentle way of saying it. I know your feeling hurt. But the sooner you forget about her, the sooner the hurt will go away.

[Tiger-Lily]

 

If you happen to see her at the bar don't be rude. Say "Hi" and leave it as that. You don't have to be enemies. Just bid her the time of day that would be fine.