JamesB Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 I met with my ex a week ago for a drink. She instigated it and I like a fool went along with it. I know she is seeing someone else so I should have stayed well clear. Anyway we had a great night and kissed at the end. She said she really missed me and still loved me and couldnt get over me. She said she was going to stop seeing this other guy and we arranged to meet up later in the week. For A couple of days things seemed great again. She text me a lot of nice texts and called a lot and it was just like old times. Then I asked her why it still said she was in a relationship with this other guy on facebook. She was very cagey about it and said she hadnt spoke to him about it yet but was going to. The day we were supposed to meet I didnt hear from her. I called but she didnt answer, then I got a text from her saying she would call me in a bit. She never called so I text her to ask if we were sill meeting. She said sorry she couldnt but could we meet another night? I said ok but was disappointed and a little annoyed that shed kept me hanging all day! I went to the pub with my mates instead and got quite drunk. I sent her a text saying I felt as though she was just playing with me and I wasnt going to stand for it again. She replied a nasty text saying this is why we split in the first place, I was too full on etc. I then sent her a long text saying everything Id wanted for 2 months about how she was immature for seeing someone behind my back and how much of a liar she is. It was quite nasty. She now hates me and wants nothing to do with me. I dont regret saying what I did, she even agreed that i was right about some of it and I had to get it off my chest as she really did screw me over. But now I have no chance with her and if im honest is the girl I love like ive never loved a girl before. I know shes bad news, shes a proven liar and cheat and emotionally immature so why cant I just forget about her? Im insanely jelous about her new guy and feel like I had the chance to get her back and blew it! Why cant I get over her??
spyyder Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 I had the chance to get her back and blew it! Nope, you didn't blow it because you never actually had a chance. If you did, then she would've already broken up with her new guy before contacting you, or at least break up with him as soon as she said she would. She held onto her new bf because she's still into him or isn't sure who to choose (you or him) or didn't think that you & her would workout so she kept him as her safety. Doesn't matter which way, you never had a chance bro. 2nd chances only work if both parties are 100% committed to it, believe it can/will work out and are willing to put in the effort - would you say that she meets any of these requirements? Did you find out why she couldn't make it to your meet up? If she really wanted to work it out with you, she would have meet you at every prearranged meet up unless something really important cropped up, which for her was probably her new guy knocking on her door wanting a quickie. I can see why you feel this way, as things started well and everything went downhill after you got drunk and sent that text. I can say that doing that only accelerated the outcome. Btw, I heard that girls in England (especially in London) are notorious cheaters. Is this true?
TaraMaiden Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 ....... Btw, I heard that girls in England (especially in London) are notorious cheaters. Is this true? Yes it is. But then again, so are guys in England, so it breaks about even.... 'Bout the same as in any other big City I guess.....
Beeotch Posted August 1, 2010 Posted August 1, 2010 I met with my ex a week ago for a drink. She instigated it and I like a fool went along with it. I know she is seeing someone else so I should have stayed well clear. Anyway we had a great night and kissed at the end. She said she really missed me and still loved me and couldnt get over me. She said she was going to stop seeing this other guy and we arranged to meet up later in the week. For A couple of days things seemed great again. She text me a lot of nice texts and called a lot and it was just like old times. Then I asked her why it still said she was in a relationship with this other guy on facebook. She was very cagey about it and said she hadnt spoke to him about it yet but was going to. The day we were supposed to meet I didnt hear from her. I called but she didnt answer, then I got a text from her saying she would call me in a bit. She never called so I text her to ask if we were sill meeting. She said sorry she couldnt but could we meet another night? I said ok but was disappointed and a little annoyed that shed kept me hanging all day! I went to the pub with my mates instead and got quite drunk. I sent her a text saying I felt as though she was just playing with me and I wasnt going to stand for it again. She replied a nasty text saying this is why we split in the first place, I was too full on etc. I then sent her a long text saying everything Id wanted for 2 months about how she was immature for seeing someone behind my back and how much of a liar she is. It was quite nasty. She now hates me and wants nothing to do with me. I dont regret saying what I did, she even agreed that i was right about some of it and I had to get it off my chest as she really did screw me over. But now I have no chance with her and if im honest is the girl I love like ive never loved a girl before. I know shes bad news, shes a proven liar and cheat and emotionally immature so why cant I just forget about her? Im insanely jelous about her new guy and feel like I had the chance to get her back and blew it! Why cant I get over her?? Sorry to hear about that drama. The GOOD news is, you actually CAN get over her. It is just not going to be some overnight miracle though. And that my friend is the dilemma. Everyone wants to be "strong" especially when it seems like the other person is happy and moved on and we want to just wake up overnight and be done....it doesn't work like that though. You can pretend to be over it, but you're truly over it when you're over it. Give yourself some time. So long as you know the truth about why she isn't for you, and make a stand and live your life....one day you will be completely over it. You can and will be over it...just after some time.
Author JamesB Posted August 1, 2010 Author Posted August 1, 2010 Thanks for the replies guys. Yes I guess it will just take time to get over her. I got the feeling she was just keeping me hanging on as some sort of backup in case it didn't work out with this new guy, but cos I love her I guess I just fooled myself into believing she did want me back which did me no good whatsoever! As for English girls being cheats I'm afraid my experience is yes they are. 3 of my previous exs cheated on me, 4 including this 1! The only girl that never cheated was an Italian girl I was with for 3 years! but English men are just as bad, I haven't cheated since I was 21 which is 9 years but I did:love: a lot when I was younger so I guess we're just as bad!
106rob Posted August 1, 2010 Posted August 1, 2010 feel for you mate,i know what your going through i suspect my ex had someone lined up hence the sudden split from our near perfect relationship and from being "her world" to her "resenting" me in under 2 months becuase like yours she said i was too keen and she wasnt ready and needed space...even though she is the one that suggested we move in together and she wanted a baby next year! (she was just leaveing a shared house and didnt want to have to go homeand my parents are moveing down south in september with work) so we both needed somwhere,started looking and everything then my parents offerd to let us rent my house quite cheap just to see how things went for a year first (we hadnt been together that long) but we just clicked in a way i never have beforee and thaught things i never have aswell!! and yes i have to agree english lads/girls are notorios cheaters and 99% always get caught out,i never cheated in a relationship but every one of my friends has male and female half of them on there own door step aswell!
JacquesA.LeFrancais Posted August 1, 2010 Posted August 1, 2010 Thanks for the replies guys. Yes I guess it will just take time to get over her. I got the feeling she was just keeping me hanging on as some sort of backup in case it didn't work out with this new guy, but cos I love her I guess I just fooled myself into believing she did want me back which did me no good whatsoever! As for English girls being cheats I'm afraid my experience is yes they are. 3 of my previous exs cheated on me, 4 including this 1! The only girl that never cheated was an Italian girl I was with for 3 years! but English men are just as bad, I haven't cheated since I was 21 which is 9 years but I did:love: a lot when I was younger so I guess we're just as bad! 2 words: No Contact http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t81399/ It's your only way out. She doesn't love you.
Author JamesB Posted August 2, 2010 Author Posted August 2, 2010 Yes I'm going no contact. I've deleted her from my facebook and deleted her number. It's going to be hard but worth it I hope. I did it before for a month so I can do it again but for good this time. Cheers rob it's **** when people use you as a backup and toy with your emotions and your too blinded by love that you don't see it till it's too late and it's heartbreak all over again. I swear I will never use anybody like this and I don't think anybody who has been used would. I also found out today that the reason she cancelled on me and went cold is because she was seeing this other guy so she chose to see him over me which proves that everything she said to me when we went for the drink was utter bull and designed just to keep me hanging there just incase it doesn't work with her new guy.
DenverBachelor Posted August 2, 2010 Posted August 2, 2010 Btw, I heard that girls in England (especially in London) are notorious cheaters. Is this true? I heard that girls in England (especially in London) are notorious cheaters. Is that true? I fixed that for you.
spyyder Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 (edited) I heard that girls in England (especially in London) are notorious cheaters. Is that true? I fixed that for you. Normally girls cheat with a reason, such as not getting enough attention, affection and a general lack of sex. I've been told by many Brit immigrants that the women in England cheat for no reason, even if they are 100% satisfied with their relationship, they still cheat. This is of course in comparison to the US. I've been to the UK several times, and I remember when I was in Manchester at a restaurant, a BUNCH of women were openly talking about when/how many times they cheated on their husbands/boyfriends. They then justified it with terrible reasons such as "the plumber was fit, I couldn't help it", "he was too possessive so I shagged 3 blokes", "he wouldn't pay for my ???? lessons", and one woman was going on about how she cheats on her husband because he was too thick ('thick' means stupid in England) to notice - I guess she confused stupid with trusting. I also remember being at a McDonalds in a university town called Loughborough and overhearing a group of young girls talking about who they cheated on, and what surprised me was these girls looked 12-14 years old! I was also very surprised that there were many 14-16 year old girls acting so 'sexed-up' in the busy areas. I remember clubbing in London when I was 19 (legal age there is 18!) and I witnessed many club fights, and all of them were over a cheating/slutty girl. It seemed like every fight in that country starts from a cheating woman. Anyway bro...my advice is to date someone foreign as long as your in the UK. I noticed that there are many foreigners in the UK, so it shouldn't be hard. Edited August 3, 2010 by spyyder
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