twenty4amp Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 (edited) Its been a year, read all the post, followed the better advice. I have gain some helpful insight into myself, found a strength I never knew I had, took good care of myself. Did all that is suggested to move on. And for the most part I have. I still think about her a bit, a mixture of anger and sadness, but they are not consuming. I am not lonely, I enjoy my time on my own to a fault at times. Mostly, I am all right. I am at a good place overall. But getting here took a great deal of effort and staying here takes even more. I am finding myself becoming increasingly exhausted. Maybe it is weak of me to look outside myself for some energy. I do not want relationship for relationship sake. That would be even more unwanted work. And a one night stand...yawn. I just want to look into someone's eyes who I find special and have them feel the same. I know I asking for to much. Edited July 31, 2010 by twenty4amp
smk Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 I just want to look into someone's eyes who I find special and have them feel the same. I know I asking for to much. I dont think that is asking too much. I have never really been a relationship person, but when I was with my ex we had a special connection, something that was beyond what words could describe, something that felt like we had a spiritual bond and something as you said felt special. I think there comes a point in one's life where that what matters, I am not talking from experience here but those are my views, I wouldnt want to be with someone just for the sake of being with them, I would want to be with someone that goes beyond that initial attraction, someone who makes me feel that spark and that spark grows with each day... Thats the feeling my ex gave me, and told me that I gave her... As for one night stands havent done them in over a year - they just lost their appeal to me.
This Hurts Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 I don't think you've completely moved on yet. This might be good or bad news to you, or maybe both. You're almost there, it seems. A year tends to be what people think is the deadline for recovering from a breakup, but for many it takes a bit longer than that. You're at a functional level and it seems like you're not hurting anymore, good for you. You said you have just become exhausted, though. I think it's time for you to lay back and stop worrying. Just relax. Keep doing what you're doing, but it doesn't seem like you're at a place where you have to keep worrying about whether you're doing the right thing or not (like a lot of us here). We have to make sure in the early stages that we're keeping NC, staying social, eating right, exercising, etc. However, you're past that and I think you're able to do all those things without worrying about them as well as relax. Take a vacation if you can. I just want to look into someone's eyes who I find special and have them feel the same. I know I asking for to much. You need to develop a relationship for this Again with what you said about being exhausted; maybe you need a little more time alone. I think in a few more months you'll have the energy and a stronger desire to get up and find someone new. Until then, keep taking care of yourself. Good luck.
newguyhere Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 twenty4amp, I am in the same situation as you. It has been a year for me too and what you wrote I could have wrote. I am not very good at expressing my feelings or giving comforting advice, but from what I just read I feel exactly the same as you do. I hope for both our sake this is the last "feel bad" stage and the next one is all good I am new to this hertbreak crap but I think we will be ok.
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