mistressgirl Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 Well it all started my senior year, i went to the cottage with a new group of people for my prom weekend. I kinda always had a crush on this guy, lets call him "Adam", who happened to be a friend of a friend at the cottage. That weeked we all got really drunk, it was my first time drinking. Things got a little crazy and i ended up making out with Adam. Now that wouldn't be so bad if Adam didn't have a girlfriend of 8 months. Lets call her "Anna." This was my first time i have ever been in a situation like that, so the guilt was really high at this time. This was back in may 2009. Adam is extremely sneaky which made this all very exciting. He would play footsies with me under the table, grab my hand when no one was looking, and the one morning on the trip he came up to me while i was brushing my teeth and everyone was asleep. He pulled me in close and whispered in my ear "lemme taste how minty fresh ur breath is." At that point i had to remind him of his girlfriend and push him away. Now when we went back to school we went back to not speaking to each other. But i became close friends with his close friends. We are both really quiet and shy so we never really talk to each other. So october comes along, and im still crushing on adam. We both went to a mutual friends party and ended up drinking a bit too much rum. I ended up leaving the party with him and 2 new friends we made that night. We talked a lot that night and started to become a lot closer. As we walked to the park he walked by my side. we started making out and things got pretty intense. He was putting his hand up my shirt, my hand was going down his pants. As one of our new friends drove me home, Adam got out of the car walked me to the door and kissed me goodnight. You could imagine my excitement that night, i didnt get much sleep. So as the months went by, i became best friends with one of his best friends. so me and adam were pretty close too. One night in january he started texting me, asking if i wanted to come out and chill with him and some friends. I was studying that night so i couldnt, but our texts ended up getting pretty flirtatious, and we made plans to meet up on the monday morning. I was a virgin at this point and adam had lost his virginity to his girlfriend back in november. I dunno how i possibly planned it out but me and adam had sex in the back seat of my car. It happened a few more times in the following months. One day when we were about to have sex we got into a conversation about his girlfriend. His conscience came in and he said he couldnt do it anymore. It was awkward seeing him after that. None of our friends knew what was going on between us. Anna was always there and it was awkward for me to even speak to her. After about 2 months i started getting texts from adam, saying he missed what we had going on. we met up just me and him and had sex in the park. As this past year has gone by i ended up falling for Adam and he didnt even notice. We have an on and off relationship going. Whenever we are out with a group of friends he will always play these mind games with me. Like behind our friends backs he will tickle my leg with his toes, he'll grab my ass when no one can see, and he'll even put his hand on my lap under the table. It makes me weak in the knees. I'm head over heals for him, and I'm probably just one of the many girls he's cheating on Anna with. I told him many times that i cant do this anymore, and he says things like " its probably for the best, but im secretly hopeing u'll cave." this crush has been going on for more than a year. He's almost like an addiction. Everytime i try to give him up i end up smoking to replace him. I need the excitement he brings me, how i cant stop myself from texting him. WHAT SHOULD I DO??
Rifareal Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 First of all lookn at the larger picture. Adam has a girlfriend which he didn't wanted to give up. He is just using you for what?... To flirt with? You know in the end your most likely to loose in this situation. Look for other guys or just stop and think deeper its hard but it will be harder if you don't.
whichwayisup Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 Tell him to F-OFF and leave you alone .. Then, ask yourself why you keep fooling around and having sex with a guy who only wants sex from you. He has a girlfriend and hasn't broken up with her to be with you! Instead, he's keeping you on the side, playing you like a fiddle. STOP flirting and allowing him to flirt with you. And no more sex, ever again, even if he begs for it. One day his girlfriend is going to find out, so be prepared to deal with that, even more so if she's a friend of yours too. Find a single guy who you can love and have whenever you want, not some schmuck who feels he can get what he wants from you on his time frame.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 So everytime he sees you he just wants to f---? He doesn't date you, neither does he ever need to make an effort to " woo" you because you're already giving it up already. And you actually like this guy? He's a douchebag, low life cheater who deserves no one, least of all his girlfriend. You better let this one go because not only are you doing his girlfriend a disservice, but you're lowering yourself to being disrespected.
LucreziaBorgia Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 WHAT SHOULD I DO?? Stop selling yourself short before this sort of thing becomes a pattern. Once you are known as 'that girl' you will not shake that reputation and like a self-fulfilling prophecy you will live as that girl for a long time until you untangle what led you there to begin with. You will find that guys will not date you because they know they don't have to. When you accept being the 'other' that is about all you can expect, particularly at your age. I did what you did at 15. I continued that life as the 'other girl' for a good many years, and eventually picked up the charming habit of being a chronic cheat as well. It took a long, long time of introspection and work to stop being 'that girl' that I had set the pattern for so many years ago. Walk away while you can and try to repair the damage - you will be fighting an uphill battle because I can tell you with 100% assuredness that other people know. They always do. Dudes talk amongst themselves. At least it will be a one off and not a lifetime of errors you will be trying to correct, both internally and socially.
Author mistressgirl Posted August 3, 2010 Author Posted August 3, 2010 okay so heres the update on this story ... me and my close friends, including adam, went out to go watch a movie. so adam invites some 16 year old and her friend to come join us. Then he later ditches me and my friend to try and get lucky with this girl. He came straight out and said it in front of me that he hopes to get laid. So later on that night i sent him a text message letting him know how much of a dick he is and that he treats me like ****, i also said hes a horrible friend and tto never speak to me ever again. The thing is that we share a best friend that has no idea about our little affair, so it my be hard to ignore him completely. Im contemplating whether or not to tell his gf what i've done, or is that a horrible move? anyone here experienced that?
xpaperxcutx Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 okay so heres the update on this story ... me and my close friends, including adam, went out to go watch a movie. so adam invites some 16 year old and her friend to come join us. Then he later ditches me and my friend to try and get lucky with this girl. He came straight out and said it in front of me that he hopes to get laid. So later on that night i sent him a text message letting him know how much of a dick he is and that he treats me like ****, i also said hes a horrible friend and tto never speak to me ever again. The thing is that we share a best friend that has no idea about our little affair, so it my be hard to ignore him completely. Im contemplating whether or not to tell his gf what i've done, or is that a horrible move? anyone here experienced that? Good girl, you did the right thing. Go out and make new friends. I think most high school friendships only last for those years that you're in actually in high school. Afterwards everyone just drifts apart.
Author mistressgirl Posted August 4, 2010 Author Posted August 4, 2010 thanks:) but how bad of an idea would it be if i told Anna what her boyfriend has been up to? I realize she will be pissed at me but theyve been in a relationship for about 2 years, i think she deserves to know
LucreziaBorgia Posted August 4, 2010 Posted August 4, 2010 Mistress, she probably will not react in the way you think she will. If anything they will set up a united front against you. She is going to believe him, defend him and forgive him over you regardless.
CrayonAngel Posted August 4, 2010 Posted August 4, 2010 Funny that when the other woman gets a taste of her own medicine and gets pushed to the side she suddenly wants to tell the GF/W. You really need to look into yourself, don't you think your worth more than being a secret to everyone for this slimeball?
Green Posted August 4, 2010 Posted August 4, 2010 OP, you ask for our advice but you knew what you should have done and not done. You got wrapped up in the excitment of it all but you knew it was wrong and that you would only get hurt. Adam isn't as smart as you think he is and if his gf wanted to open her eyes she could see what kind of guy he is with out any help. You might not realize it but the only reason you want to tell his gf is to hurt him. Just move on and forget him, you deserve an exciting fun guy who is HONEST and RESPECTFUL of you.
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