Thierro Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 There is a possibility that you will not find what you are looking for. You simply just can’t know this. What I do know is that your changes are slim because you don’t have the right healthy fundamentals to build a relationship on; self-love/worth My ex broke up with me 2 months ago. I really believed that we would stay together forever. I LOVE to be in a relationship; doing stuff together, learning to know each other, hug her, kiss her, caress her and what not. I don’t know what the future will bring. It’s useless to think about the future when you only create expectations that are far from reality. Maybe I will meet someone, maybe I won’t. After the relationship I started loving myself for who I am. If people don’t like me, why should I care? I am doing my own best right now. People are missing out on me not the other way around. You need to find your own happiness. Others should not make you happy. Stop the rain from within and let the sun break through the clouds. I believe you have a good potential to do so and become great and self loving. People avoid rain and embrace sunlight. Link to post Share on other sites
Thierro Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 “Speaking of which, withholding sex untill I feel like we've bonded is a good idea. Are there many men who would be fine with that though?” If they respect and love you enough they will. Hold your ground. Consider sex after one year.. This will eliminate a big part of useless man and you will feel good about yourself. Also DON’T give in when YOU have the urge for sex. Always be aware of red flags and have a good sense of what acceptable behavior is from a man. You should read about these matters. You will also find a big help here on LS for figuring that out. NEVER EVER have a one night stand again in your life. Promise yourself this. It’s also absolutely a bad idea to use this as a means to get pregnant. Give your child some good genes from a good man. Just hold on for a moment. If you don't you WILL be sorry. There is enough time for having a kid? Link to post Share on other sites
Thierro Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 Not only would I be fine with witholding sex until I'm bonded with the women, but it's a requirement in my case. I may not be in the majority, but I know I'm not unique on this. The same for me. See? Right this moment 2 men are having a conversation with you with the same requirements. I even think that the majority of men will think a like when it comes down to a special woman in their life. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SassyKitten Posted August 6, 2010 Author Share Posted August 6, 2010 Well, good to know that there are at least 2 men out there who see that there is more to a woman than her goodies! While I would rather not go the one night stand route to conceive (although at the rate I'm going I will probably have to get a sperm donor!), I am 28. Realistically, I probably have another 15 years tops before menopause. And I would rather spend a few years building a solid relationship with a man before I have kids with him. But my frustration is, at the rate I'm going, I'm going to have to turn into someone I'm not in order to get a man to stick around. As in quieter, more passive, less ambitious, and so happy I want to throw a damn party celebrating my past! Plus, I would love for someone to be able to explain to me a simple way to stop wanting these things when I've ached for them since I was 12. I figure it's not easy, or someone would have come up with an explanation by now. Link to post Share on other sites
MrNate Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 Well, good to know that there are at least 2 men out there who see that there is more to a woman than her goodies! While I would rather not go the one night stand route to conceive (although at the rate I'm going I will probably have to get a sperm donor!), I am 28. Realistically, I probably have another 15 years tops before menopause. And I would rather spend a few years building a solid relationship with a man before I have kids with him. But my frustration is, at the rate I'm going, I'm going to have to turn into someone I'm not in order to get a man to stick around. As in quieter, more passive, less ambitious, and so happy I want to throw a damn party celebrating my past! Plus, I would love for someone to be able to explain to me a simple way to stop wanting these things when I've ached for them since I was 12. I figure it's not easy, or someone would have come up with an explanation by now. There is no simple way, maybe not even a possible way, because your heart desires these things. When that happens, they are near impossible to let go of, especially when your goals are indeed obtainable, as they happen each day to someone around the planet. I think the first step is to stop running away from this, turn around and take time to think about how you can improve things. You can only go about this in two ways: Constructively or Destructively. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SassyKitten Posted August 6, 2010 Author Share Posted August 6, 2010 I think the first step is to stop running away from this, turn around and take time to think about how you can improve things. You can only go about this in two ways: Constructively or Destructively. Hmmmm, and impatience does lead to destructively..... Link to post Share on other sites
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