kirstyleanne Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 Me & my boyfriend split up about 4 weeks ago. He said he hasn't been happy because towards the end of our relationship college was stressing me out and i use to get moody sometimes and take it out on him. I never meant to :/ Everytime we argued about it i said i'd change and then everything was ok. But then it kept on happening and because i said i'd change too much and it never happened it just became unbeleiveable to him. He said we should just be friends now because it if carried on and got worse then we might not even be talking so he said its for the best. He said he loves me and and that i'll always mean something to him. Our relationship was going so great we was each others first love, we lost our virginity together. Ever since then i found it hard to go to sleep at night because everymorning when i woke up i'd think i dreamt it and it made me happy .. until i realised and get knocked back down again. My eating became ridiculous and i wasnt eating as much as i did before :/ . I realised what i did wasn't clever i just wanted to show him as a friend that i can be better then maybe we would find our way. I needed help. I didn't want to lose him. 18months is way to long to be together to just forget, right? A week later it all kicked in what had happened and i bombarded him with text messages trying to get him back. This just pushed him away as he couldnt handle with me in that state. I started to get worried that i might of been pregnant because the last time we had sex i forgot to take my pill the next day and a few days afterwards. I made a drs appointment and he came with me because he didnt want me to be alone. I had a bloodtest and the results were negative. I hadnt had my period though so the dr booked me in for another one to be 100%. The week after this we had still been texting, he promised me that he would contact me to hang out with him when the times right and go cinema like we was going to anyway. His mates are my mates and they said i can still go out with them. One night last week i went out with my mate and i was so drunk i could barely walk, she thought the best idea would be to text him to drive me home, she did this. I told her not to because he'd be mad but she did it anyway. And yes he was mad at me. He drove me home. Showed he cared though i suppose, he couldve just left me. He said that if i didnt want him to be mad at me then i had to leave him a while he told me he didnt love me anymore but i dont know if that was to help me get over it quicker. The next day i tried texting a few times apologising for the mess i got in but i got no reply. I havnt contacted him since then and he hasnt either, its been a week so far. I go to greece for the next 2 weeks aswel so i wont be contacting him then either. He seems to be fine though and having fun by what he puts on facebook. I dont know where this leads me and whether hes still going to stick to his promise. He still has my earring and i have his dvds and ipod lead. Im fed up of feeling jealous bout things, but i cant help it. And because he was mad at me that night i think i ruined my chances for being friends in time. I dont want to lose my best friend and how can something go from meaning so much to nothing at all.
Scruffydog Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 Kirsty, sorry to hear of your breakup and it's normal that you're feeling lost. You both sound very young though. Probably waaaay too young to be contemplating a lifelong committment. I do remember having those kind of ideas though when I was very young, many years ago! Enjoy your Greek holiday, have fun and don't worry about your ex. I'm sure you're both still of the age where you'll be able to easily continue a friendship once the hurting heals. Which it will... Sd
Author kirstyleanne Posted July 31, 2010 Author Posted July 31, 2010 We are young, Hes 18 and I'm 18 in november. You see i dont know if we will i feel ive annoyed him too much and i think hes over it already with the way hes going out and having fun with things he writes on facebook etc .. He did promise me that he would contact me in time but that was before i made him a little mad. and about his dvds and ipod lead .. my friend said he might just thing 'oh i dont care bout getting them back' and never ask me for them. but theyre still his so i dont think he'd do that. my earring for example hes probably thinking 'she'l contact me sooner or later to ask for it' but i dont want to ask i want him to ask for his things first.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 You're 18 and you're still young to be tied down to one person. If letting him go is better permanently, it would be better then you choose that route. Afterall, you're already stressed as is with the break up. Heal yourself first. Living in denial and thinking there is still a chance is wishful thinking, which at your age only hinders progress and growth. What's ahead? Greek vacation and new school year. You push through it all by enjoying everyday and letting go of the ex. Leave his stuff with your mates and then inform them that he should in contact with them if he wants his stuff. At this point, since he's avoiding you, you return the favor.
Author kirstyleanne Posted July 31, 2010 Author Posted July 31, 2010 I'm not bothered about getting him back as my boyfriend now i just want to be friends to be honest. My "friend" is going out with his best mate and shes had a free house for 3weeks now and her bf is living with her till her parents get back (this tuesday) so my ex is always round there now and i havnt been invited once because she wants to please her bf by having my ex over. Some friend ... :/
106rob Posted August 1, 2010 Posted August 1, 2010 hey,i know how you must be feeling right now,but honestly at 17 you have so much ahead of you! if your in college now this time next year you will be going to uni? and i guarentee you wont want to be in a relationship or might start off being (like i did with mine) but its way to hard espchally if you are at difrent uni or one is and one isnt (like in my case) uni changed/has changed everyone i know thats been in someway! and its sad to say but about 10 people i know went to uni as couples by the easter half term they had all split just enjoy yourself for now hun and if its ment to be it will be (like i keep trying to tell myself now im going throguh my worst break up yet lol) as for the friends its hard for them,dont take it out on them just yet they will feel stuck in the middle atm,im very good friends with my ex's brother(have been for years its how we got together in the first place) and i know he is having a tough time at the mo as he is stuck in the middle and doesent want either of us to think he is taking sides etc,problalby the same case for you and your mates
JacquesA.LeFrancais Posted August 1, 2010 Posted August 1, 2010 You're 18 and you're still young to be tied down to one person. If letting him go is better permanently, it would be better then you choose that route. Afterall, you're already stressed as is with the break up. Heal yourself first. Living in denial and thinking there is still a chance is wishful thinking, which at your age only hinders progress and growth. What's ahead? Greek vacation and new school year. You push through it all by enjoying everyday and letting go of the ex. Leave his stuff with your mates and then inform them that he should in contact with them if he wants his stuff. At this point, since he's avoiding you, you return the favor. I'd like to know why people say "X is too young to be with 1 person" I would like an explanation on that one. I mean, sure, over the years i've learned a lot about different people in relationships. But, if a relationship is good. Started at 18, why is it a bad thing that it happens then? Outside of this situation i mean. I hear people say that so much. I am 36 and really it doesn't affect me. I just wonder where that conclusion is drawn from?
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