newguyhere Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 I have been ignored by my ex for many months. That hurt. But the few times we did talk she always said: "I dont want a relationship with you right now". So I asked "never?" and she would always say "im not going to say never because never is a long time". So I always had hope. But after many months of NC, I finally got her to say "NEVER AGAIN" a few weeks ago which actually was a relief for me. I could finally let go. I was finally able to start moving on and I feel great about it. But... I still didnt want to see her or hear about her at this time because I was afraid of a relapse (LOL! I dont know what other word to use lol) Anyway, I deleted her from my Facebook and Messenger. Now I feel like a jack ass. I am afraid that I may have hurt HER feelings. Am I a jack ass? I still care about her feelings. I dont want to hurt her even if we cant be together again. She is still human and she CAN be hurt by someone she dont love anymore. But will she be hurt over this? Shoud I care? Anyone else ever in a similar situation?
fresco Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 I have been ignored by my ex for many months. That hurt. But the few times we did talk she always said: "I dont want a relationship with you right now". So I asked "never?" and she would always say "im not going to say never because never is a long time". So I always had hope. But after many months of NC, I finally got her to say "NEVER AGAIN" a few weeks ago which actually was a relief for me. I could finally let go. I was finally able to start moving on and I feel great about it. But... I still didnt want to see her or hear about her at this time because I was afraid of a relapse (LOL! I dont know what other word to use lol) Anyway, I deleted her from my Facebook and Messenger. Now I feel like a jack ass. I am afraid that I may have hurt HER feelings. Am I a jack ass? I still care about her feelings. I dont want to hurt her even if we cant be together again. She is still human and she CAN be hurt by someone she dont love anymore. But will she be hurt over this? Shoud I care? Anyone else ever in a similar situation? Yea man i can understand that completely. My ex wanted to stay friends cause she said "I don't know what id do without you everyday" and everything. But the bottom line is, if you have strong feelings for this girl its selfish of her to expect you to be her friend, especially since she told you she never wants a relationship. You really shouldn't worry about her feelings anymore dude
TaraMaiden Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 Quit over-thinking. You think she's over-thinking this? You think she cared while she ignored you for all those months? Cut her out, go complete NC, delete everything you have, and let yourself move on. Your life - your world - does not revolve around her, and she really shouldn't be your consideration. if she's "big" enough to split from you, she's "big" enough to heal on her own without you fretting over her. She lived ok without you before you came along, she can continue now you're out of the picture. I suggest you stop worrying about how she's doing, and focus more on how you're doing. Let it go. There's nothing to hold onto. is there?
Author newguyhere Posted July 30, 2010 Author Posted July 30, 2010 Thanks for the support fresco and thanks for telling me what I need to hear TaraMaiden. I didnt really think of it that way and it makes sense. I am a little embarassed for NOT thinking that way after reading your post! ha ha. Thanks for clearing that up
Username37 Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 I have been ignored by my ex for many months. That hurt. But the few times we did talk she always said: "I dont want a relationship with you right now". So I asked "never?" and she would always say "im not going to say never because never is a long time". So I always had hope. But after many months of NC, I finally got her to say "NEVER AGAIN" a few weeks ago which actually was a relief for me. I could finally let go. I was finally able to start moving on and I feel great about it. But... I still didnt want to see her or hear about her at this time because I was afraid of a relapse (LOL! I dont know what other word to use lol) Anyway, I deleted her from my Facebook and Messenger. Now I feel like a jack ass. I am afraid that I may have hurt HER feelings. Am I a jack ass? I still care about her feelings. I dont want to hurt her even if we cant be together again. She is still human and she CAN be hurt by someone she dont love anymore. But will she be hurt over this? Shoud I care? Anyone else ever in a similar situation? Hello. I've been ignoring my ex for 2 months. My ex told me "I'm not looking for anything serious right now" right after the break up. Deleting her from your social networking pages and messagers was a SMART idea. If you want to be 100 percent, deleting them is a good idea. Do you want to hear their life without you? I'll answer that. NO!!! NC for 2 months so far. During my run, she broke it 4 times and I ignored her 4/4 times. I had to. I want to recover even though I love her dearly. And yes, I felt like **** afterward because I'm human and I was ignoring a girl that I love, but I knew that it will pass. I'll take a small guilt trip over heartbreak any day ya know? Good luck dude
smk Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 Newguy - unfortunately what everyone says is true - she called it off, she ignored you, she didnt feel guilty about it, so you shouldnt feel so bad doing it too... I know its not easy, and as USERNAME said you may at times feel guilty, but hey its a small price to pay to heal our hearts... I am coming up to 3 weeks NC and she broke it 3 times - I caved in once and replied and that was a set back for me - if she is hurt by me NC'ing her then hey she is a big girl and can deal with it. Unfortunately every action has a reaction and one of the reactions of a break up is cutting the other person out of your life (unless you have kids, or other contributing factors)... Dont feel bad - it will pass
bonpaw2008 Posted July 31, 2010 Posted July 31, 2010 Thanks for the support fresco and thanks for telling me what I need to hear TaraMaiden. I didnt really think of it that way and it makes sense. I am a little embarassed for NOT thinking that way after reading your post! ha ha. Thanks for clearing that up Hey New, don't ever feel embarassed, that is what LS and all of these wonderful people are here for! You are too close to the situation, and you care too much about this girl to be objective. We are not close, and we can give objective advice, most of which will consist of focusing on yourself and maintaining NC for you, no matter if it is hurting the other person or not. This person left you, quit you, you have nothing to feel guilty for. Good luck, glad you found us
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