Thorgs Posted July 29, 2010 Posted July 29, 2010 I'm never giving that trust away ever again I don't have a heart anymore to give.
scottishlassy Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 I don't have a heart anymore to give. Amen! I feel the same way!
Thorgs Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 Amen! I feel the same way! I will tell you this though, going for a jog really makes you feel great and you can feel a pulse again. Go pound some pavement, the ground needs to know it's needed.
Username37 Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 why the **** do the dumpers get away so easy - why the **** do they get to get away with getting on with their lives like nothing ever happened yet we go through the most excruciating, harrowing experiences of our lives??? what did we ever do to ****ing deserve this....??? I am sorry that I fell in love with you, I am sorry that I wanted nothing more that to give up the air I breathe for you, I am sorry that all I wanted was to spend the rest of my life and eternity with you... You know what punish me for that - break my ****ing heart, tear it apart, crush me to pieces and move on with your life like nothing happened.... Because they have the weight off their shoulders now and they're now free to do what they craved but couldn't because they were with us.
LostinTokyo Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 I'm there with ya, buddy, but let me tell you.. no matter how it seems, if you guys shared any kind of connection in the least, they didn't get away scotts free. I'm sure they feel punched in the gut too. But ya know? It's not about them. It's about you right now. Don't let this person turn your world upside down without a fight. If you want revenge, show them you never needed them in the first place. Continue to be awesome and move the hell on like you never cared either. This is the one revenge I can approve of. PS my gf left me a week ago. I'm hurting like hell too. This is what I'm doing to fast forward the pain: 1. Think about how you're feeling. Feel it. (It's ok) 2. Ask yourself "Can I welcome this feeling?" 3. "Could I let it go?" 4. "Would I let it go?" 5. "When?" 6. See how you feel now Repeat until you have your emotions under control. It's been helping me through this. You should read my post. I'm having it pretty rough too.
Author smk Posted July 30, 2010 Author Posted July 30, 2010 I'm there with ya, buddy, but let me tell you.. no matter how it seems, if you guys shared any kind of connection in the least, they didn't get away scotts free. I'm sure they feel punched in the gut too. But ya know? It's not about them. It's about you right now. Don't let this person turn your world upside down without a fight. If you want revenge, show them you never needed them in the first place. Continue to be awesome and move the hell on like you never cared either. This is the one revenge I can approve of. PS my gf left me a week ago. I'm hurting like hell too. This is what I'm doing to fast forward the pain: 1. Think about how you're feeling. Feel it. (It's ok) 2. Ask yourself "Can I welcome this feeling?" 3. "Could I let it go?" 4. "Would I let it go?" 5. "When?" 6. See how you feel now Repeat until you have your emotions under control. It's been helping me through this. You should read my post. I'm having it pretty rough too. Hey Tokyo, Yeah i know what you mean, our break up was amicable, we had a lot of external influences, however it still hurt like hell... I can only imagine what she went through, but i am realised that she started dealing with way before telling me it was over.. I still do believe that there were other factors, which i may never know and honestly now i dont really want to know either - it would just open up the would even more... as you said now its about us and not them. I read your post buddy, and i can only imagine what you must be dealing with being in a different country, but remember we are all here for you... we have all faced the pain of heartbreak and tbh i have found a great support network here on LS... your version of revenge is the best - i have maintained NC for almost 3 weeks now, and i do have my moments of weakness but i have stuck to my guns, and she does txt, and has been asking about me, and yesterday a new low - sent back some stuff i had left over (stuff TBH that i didnt really care about) - she said that because i run and it rains i might need the rain coat - its the middle of summer with not a cloud in sight.... be strong buddy we are all here for you....
bonpaw2008 Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 Because they have the weight off their shoulders now and they're now free to do what they craved but couldn't because they were with us. This one fits me to a tee! Any time we fought he always said that he never got to be single after his divorce (not sure what he was doing for the year and a half that he was out of her house!) and that he always had the nagging feeling about having something so serious. So go out there ****er, go and see what else you can find. Tons of options out there for a POS loser like you....
Author smk Posted July 30, 2010 Author Posted July 30, 2010 This one fits me to a tee! Any time we fought he always said that he never got to be single after his divorce (not sure what he was doing for the year and a half that he was out of her house!) and that he always had the nagging feeling about having something so serious. So go out there ****er, go and see what else you can find. Tons of options out there for a POS loser like you.... you tell 'em where to stick it....
Steadfast Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 I feel your pain. We didn't do anything wrong. Some times things don't work out. I miss my ex too. She dumped me and I have no control over her actions. You didn't do anything wrong. Remember that. Agree with all but saying 'we' didn't do anything wrong is just plain... wrong. No one is perfect, we've all fallen short and are probably guilty of taking the one we love most for granted. It's natural, and normal. Being in denial over that just slows the healing process. Admit your failings. A poster here says he takes exactly half of what went wrong in the marriage, but where the betrayal starts is where his ex takes over. I agree with this; we can't be responsible for something we have no control over. As for you, now, the best thing is to accept it, humble yourself and adopt a forgiving nature. This may fly in the face of what your instincts are telling you (which may include revenge, or hoping she's miserable, misses you, etc) but it is in fact the one and only way to heal. Treating her nicely and having a forgiving spirit will let some joy back into your life, and believe it or not, cause your ex to sit up and take notice. Regain your attractiveness! Let her go, and let it be. Take it slow and allow yourself to heal. It starts with doing the right thing, everyday. A loving life starts with self love-
Author smk Posted July 30, 2010 Author Posted July 30, 2010 Agree with all but saying 'we' didn't do anything wrong is just plain... wrong. No one is perfect, we've all fallen short and are probably guilty of taking the one we love most for granted. It's natural, and normal. Being in denial over that just slows the healing process. Admit your failings. A poster here says he takes exactly half of what went wrong in the marriage, but where the betrayal starts is where his ex takes over. I agree with this; we can't be responsible for something we have no control over. As for you, now, the best thing is to accept it, humble yourself and adopt a forgiving nature. This may fly in the face of what your instincts are telling you (which may include revenge, or hoping she's miserable, misses you, etc) but it is in fact the one and only way to heal. Treating her nicely and having a forgiving spirit will let some joy back into your life, and believe it or not, cause your ex to sit up and take notice. Regain your attractiveness! Let her go, and let it be. Take it slow and allow yourself to heal. It starts with doing the right thing, everyday. A loving life starts with self love- Hey steadfast - what you say is true - it takes 2 to tango, and even though there were certain external factors that contributed to our break, there must have been something that i did that made her make the choice she made - and i fully accept that. I dont want revenge, i dont want her to be miserable, and i have forgiven her for whatever happened. she had a tough choice to make - be disowned by her family and risk everything for a guy she had been with for 6 months, or take the security or her family and lose someone she once loved? its an easy choice - her family have been there 29 yrs - me only 6 months, and i also understand how hard it is for a girl to stand up to family as opposed to a guy (i dont mean this in a sexist way).... i will admit, i do still sometimes get angry that she didnt give our relationship a chance but by no means am i angry at her. I am angry at some of her actions, such as not talking to me when the problem first arose (3 weeks before we broke up) rather than waiting till the end to tell me, maybe she didnt feel comfortable, or maybe there must have been other reasons, i dont know TBH. Maybe if i had done things differently, maybe if i had not been so compromising, the maybe could go on, maybe if i would have fought harder, maybe if i would have gone behind her back and spoken to her dad, led me to nowhere - and now i accept that i just like everyone else I am not perfect by any means and i tried my damned hardest to save the relationship, unfortunately when push came to shove she had already made up her mind. My hurt doesnt stem from the fact that she left me, but from the fact that she felt she needed to distance herself from me without talking to me about what was bothering her, and i accepted that. And like her i did face some struggles but i chose to deal with them with her full support. it is unfortunate when you lose someone you love and care about, but unfortunately thats life, we came into this world alone and we will live alone, but we share some parts of our life with other people, and now i am glad that even though i am not with her anymore, i got the chance spend some of my life with her, i got to show her how much i love her, and felt her love in return...
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