15 Reasons Why...

July 27, 2010

http://www.viddler.com/explore/themodernmancom/videos/1/

One thing I've learned in life is that you can't change other people, only yourself.

Go ahead and tell me that I'm being shallow for posting this, but be brutally honest. If you're not sexually attracted to someone can you even consider them a mate?

I was never fat but I used to be a real skinny nerd who lacked confidence, emotionally weak, overtly nice, etc...

I started dieting, working out, doing massive amounts of cardio / HIIT. Then I worked on my emotional strength, social intelligence, confidence, starting taking control of my life.

If I can do it, you can too. Sitting there and complaining about why men aren't attracted to me because I'm overweight, here's your answer.

It's good to listen and give empathy towards people with problems. It's better to give solutions and help people better themselves.

For those who are content with being plus, it's perfectly okay. If you can find a man who truly likes you despite your weight, that's great too. This post isn't meant for every girl, just the ones who wonder why they can't get a bf because of their weight problem.

Let the bashing begin! Bring it on!!!!

Edited July 27, 2010 by JadedHeart

July 27, 2010

what you and every other poster about 'fat women' neglect to remember is that losing weight is not easy.

There seems to be this attitude of 'well d'uh, fat girls, why not just lose some weight? Then you'd have a man. Men don't like fat girls'.

This is not news. You think women who are not slim don't already know this???? They know it. They don't want to be fat. They are not stupid, just carrying some extra pounds of weight.

Do you know how many diet and exercise plans most 'fat women' have tried only to gain even more weight at the end of them? They have tried, telling them to just do it is silly, most have already tried and failed and are now wondering what on earth to do that will work.

The majority of 'fat girls' do not want to be fat, you are not 'helping' them by reinforcing to them that they are ugly and unattractive because of their weight. Nor is it news to them that their weight will hinder their chances of finding a man.

Don't you think that if it was easy to lose weight that there simply wouldn't be any fat people at all? Telling people to 'go on a diet' simply and obviously doesn't work as obesity rates are rising at a fast rate all over the western world.

July 27, 2010

Breaking News: Thin is in. Who knew?

Seriously, dude, this isn't an "answer." It's just a rant against fat chicks.

You know what? I'm going to put it out there: I've never dated a fat guy and I don't think I ever will. (I'm teensy, and they've never been my type.) But what I also don't do is create silly lists about it. Or tell them to lose some weight so they can get a girl. And I certainly don't do so and then pretend I'm kindly offering some kind of solution.

July 27, 2010

I think you're both right. But it's way easier to do masssive amounts of cardio coming from a state of being skinny rather than one of being obese. One's feet hurt and blisters come more often and with more severity, a heavy person gets winded easily. A skinny person gets a lot of passes he or she can't imagine and an obese person not only does not get but gets double burdens. Then the damn dating world is often geared around pleasure eating, the very thing an obese person must shut down and not flirt with at all.

July 27, 2010

what you and every other poster about 'fat women' neglect to remember is that losing weight is not easy.

There seems to be this attitude of 'well d'uh, fat girls, why not just lose some weight? Then you'd have a man. Men don't like fat girls'.

This is not news. You think women who are not slim don't already know this???? They know it. They don't want to be fat. They are not stupid, just carrying some extra pounds of weight.

Do you know how many diet and exercise plans most 'fat women' have tried only to gain even more weight at the end of them? They have tried, telling them to just do it is silly, most have already tried and failed and are now wondering what on earth to do that will work.

The majority of 'fat girls' do not want to be fat, you are not 'helping' them by reinforcing to them that they are ugly and unattractive because of their weight. Nor is it news to them that their weight will hinder their chances of finding a man.

Don't you think that if it was easy to lose weight that there simply wouldn't be any fat people at all? Telling people to 'go on a diet' simply and obviously doesn't work as obesity rates are rising at a fast rate all over the western world.

This is a lie. Losing weight is extremely easy. It's finding the motivation that is the hard part. People are only fat because they aren't motivated enough to stop being fat. Prior to my divorce I weighed 225 lbs at 6' and none of it was muscle. The divorce was a swift kick to the junk to motivate me to lose the flab. A smarter diet alone melted off the first 25 lbs, then the weight loss slowed down. I then added weightlifting and HIIT cardio to eliminate the other 20 lbs.

Fat people have bad eating habits and likely little to no exercise, period.

July 27, 2010

Breaking News: Thin is in. Who knew?

Seriously, dude, this isn't an "answer." It's just a rant against fat chicks.

You know what? I'm going to put it out there: I've never dated a fat guy and I don't think I ever will. (I'm teensy, and they've never been my type.) But what I also don't do is create silly lists about it. Or tell them to lose some weight so they can get a girl. And I certainly don't do so and then pretend I'm kindly offering some kind of solution.

Yep. Good point, Zen. It's kind of the same reason I don't date fat girls, it's just not up my alley. But I do not go around ranting about how ugly/disgusting they are, I think everyone is capable of finding someone compatible.

July 27, 2010

And for the life of me, the focus should not be on losing weight! The focus should be on losing fat. When you focus on losing weight solely, you also include losing important metabolically active muscle which helps with the fat loss process.

But I digress.

That's for another thread.

July 27, 2010

There are tons of men who will date overweight girls. I'm one of them. I just don't go for morbidly obese. It amazes me how picky some of these women are, then wonder why they can't get a date. If your average looking and 50 pounds overweight, Brad Pitt prolly ain't gonna date you.

July 27, 2010

This is a lie. Losing weight is extremely easy. It's finding the motivation that is the hard part. People are only fat because they aren't motivated enough to stop being fat. Prior to my divorce I weighed 225 lbs at 6' and none of it was muscle. The divorce was a swift kick to the junk to motivate me to lose the flab. A smarter diet alone melted off the first 25 lbs, then the weight loss slowed down. I then added weightlifting and HIIT cardio to eliminate the other 20 lbs.

Fat people have bad eating habits and likely little to no exercise, period.

Oh yeah, I mean losing weight is easy, keeping it off is the hard part....staying on a permanent diet for the rest of your life feeling deprived is not easy and not something most people look forward to as something pleasureable.

Not sure if you are male or female, seeing as you are 6' I'm presuming a man. Men have more muscle mass than women, therefore when they start to diet and excercise the weight drops off more quickly, but also they burn more weight while inactive, simply due to having more muscle mass than women.

I think because there is so much pressure on women to be thin that the message to control what we eat starts at a young age and sets up a very unhealthy guilt-based relationship to food. As repeated yo-yo dieting puts on more and more weight more and more diets are undertaken, and a horrible pattern is set. To be overweight, go on one diet and take up exercise is different to feeling overweight, trying a diet, failing, getting fatter, trying another diet, failing, getting fatter and all the while being told that you are fat and ugly and undesireable. The whole thing becomes totally overwhelming and seems like a problem that cannot be solved.

I was never a naturally slim person, and for a few years I got fat, so I know what I'm talking about. I dropped a few dress sizes by NOT dieting, by not obsessively going to the gym. You have to work out what works for you. I walk and cycle as much as possible (as I don't like scheduled 'have to do' exercise) so I fit it in my day, rather than seeing exercise as a chore.

I use the stairs to my apartment and carry my heavy groceries from the supermarket to home. I eat whatever the hell I want when I want, but try to include vegetables as much as possible. I do not feel guilty about anything I put in my mouth, because as soon as I do, I gorge and eat more of it. As soon as you allow yourself to eat anything, 'bad foods' lose their hold over you. I no longer keep eating when I'm obviously full. I no longer eat when I am not hungry. I don't obsessively step on the scales and fret if it's gone up. If my clothes feel tight, I check that I'm not mindlessly eating from boredom and go for a few extra walks etc.

By being more relaxed about losing weight in a mentally healthy way meant the pounds dropped off me pretty effortlessly, while low carb/low fat/weight watchers only set up and obsession with food and an aversion to exercise.

So, yes, going on a diet works, but I think especially for women who have had pressure from day one to look a certain way, the diet and then gain weight cycle starts from an early age and is very hard to get out of. If you've been in that cycle telling a person to go on yet another diet and exercise plan is obviously not going to work.

My advice to anyone seeking to lose weight is to not religiously follow some diet book, but to figure out what works for you personally. For some going regularly to the gym suits them, for me, I hated it, so I found another way that suited me. Likewise with food, find a diet, or rather way of eating and thinking about food that is personal to you and works for you, rather than following what worked for someone else. We are all individuals and your own brain is the only thing that can figure out your own personal way to keep healthy and lose weight.

July 27, 2010

Oh yeah, I mean losing weight is easy, keeping it off is the hard part....staying on a permanent diet for the rest of your life feeling deprived is not easy and not something most people look forward to as something pleasureable.

Not sure if you are male or female, seeing as you are 6' I'm presuming a man. Men have more muscle mass than women, therefore when they start to diet and excercise the weight drops off more quickly, but also they burn more weight while inactive, simply due to having more muscle mass than women.

I think because there is so much pressure on women to be thin that the message to control what we eat starts at a young age and sets up a very unhealthy guilt-based relationship to food. As repeated yo-yo dieting puts on more and more weight more and more diets are undertaken, and a horrible pattern is set. To be overweight, go on one diet and take up exercise is different to feeling overweight, trying a diet, failing, getting fatter, trying another diet, failing, getting fatter and all the while being told that you are fat and ugly and undesireable. The whole thing becomes totally overwhelming and seems like a problem that cannot be solved.

I was never a naturally slim person, and for a few years I got fat, so I know what I'm talking about. I dropped a few dress sizes by NOT dieting, by not obsessively going to the gym. You have to work out what works for you. I walk and cycle as much as possible (as I don't like scheduled 'have to do' exercise) so I fit it in my day, rather than seeing exercise as a chore.

I use the stairs to my apartment and carry my heavy groceries from the supermarket to home. I eat whatever the hell I want when I want, but try to include vegetables as much as possible. I do not feel guilty about anything I put in my mouth, because as soon as I do, I gorge and eat more of it. As soon as you allow yourself to eat anything, 'bad foods' lose their hold over you. I no longer keep eating when I'm obviously full. I no longer eat when I am not hungry. I don't obsessively step on the scales and fret if it's gone up. If my clothes feel tight, I check that I'm not mindlessly eating from boredom and go for a few extra walks etc.

By being more relaxed about losing weight in a mentally healthy way meant the pounds dropped off me pretty effortlessly, while low carb/low fat/weight watchers only set up and obsession with food and an aversion to exercise.

So, yes, going on a diet works, but I think especially for women who have had pressure from day one to look a certain way, the diet and then gain weight cycle starts from an early age and is very hard to get out of. If you've been in that cycle telling a person to go on yet another diet and exercise plan is obviously not going to work.

My advice to anyone seeking to lose weight is to not religiously follow some diet book, but to figure out what works for you personally. For some going regularly to the gym suits them, for me, I hated it, so I found another way that suited me. Likewise with food, find a diet, or rather way of eating and thinking about food that is personal to you and works for you, rather than following what worked for someone else. We are all individuals and your own brain is the only thing that can figure out your own personal way to keep healthy and lose weight.

Never going to fix your problem by just whining about it. Just stfu about it and go lose weight.

Just like men whining about not being confident shouldn't whine about it and should just stfu and go get confident.

Right?

July 27, 2010

Oh yeah, I mean losing weight is easy, keeping it off is the hard part....staying on a permanent diet for the rest of your life feeling deprived is not easy and not something most people look forward to as something pleasureable.

Not sure if you are male or female, seeing as you are 6' I'm presuming a man. Men have more muscle mass than women, therefore when they start to diet and excercise the weight drops off more quickly, but also they burn more weight while inactive, simply due to having more muscle mass than women.

I think because there is so much pressure on women to be thin that the message to control what we eat starts at a young age and sets up a very unhealthy guilt-based relationship to food. As repeated yo-yo dieting puts on more and more weight more and more diets are undertaken, and a horrible pattern is set. To be overweight, go on one diet and take up exercise is different to feeling overweight, trying a diet, failing, getting fatter, trying another diet, failing, getting fatter and all the while being told that you are fat and ugly and undesireable. The whole thing becomes totally overwhelming and seems like a problem that cannot be solved.

I was never a naturally slim person, and for a few years I got fat, so I know what I'm talking about. I dropped a few dress sizes by NOT dieting, by not obsessively going to the gym. You have to work out what works for you. I walk and cycle as much as possible (as I don't like scheduled 'have to do' exercise) so I fit it in my day, rather than seeing exercise as a chore.

I use the stairs to my apartment and carry my heavy groceries from the supermarket to home. I eat whatever the hell I want when I want, but try to include vegetables as much as possible. I do not feel guilty about anything I put in my mouth, because as soon as I do, I gorge and eat more of it. As soon as you allow yourself to eat anything, 'bad foods' lose their hold over you. I no longer keep eating when I'm obviously full. I no longer eat when I am not hungry. I don't obsessively step on the scales and fret if it's gone up. If my clothes feel tight, I check that I'm not mindlessly eating from boredom and go for a few extra walks etc.

By being more relaxed about losing weight in a mentally healthy way meant the pounds dropped off me pretty effortlessly, while low carb/low fat/weight watchers only set up and obsession with food and an aversion to exercise.

So, yes, going on a diet works, but I think especially for women who have had pressure from day one to look a certain way, the diet and then gain weight cycle starts from an early age and is very hard to get out of. If you've been in that cycle telling a person to go on yet another diet and exercise plan is obviously not going to work.

My advice to anyone seeking to lose weight is to not religiously follow some diet book, but to figure out what works for you personally. For some going regularly to the gym suits them, for me, I hated it, so I found another way that suited me. Likewise with food, find a diet, or rather way of eating and thinking about food that is personal to you and works for you, rather than following what worked for someone else. We are all individuals and your own brain is the only thing that can figure out your own personal way to keep healthy and lose weight.

I think this response went the scenic route to basically agree with what I said in that weight loss is easy for anyone if they are willing to put forth the effort.

July 27, 2010

I think this response went the scenic route to basically agree with what I said in that weight loss is easy for anyone if they are willing to put forth the effort.

I think she said it was possible, not easy. Don't confuse the two.

I think it is possible for most people to graduate medical school, if they work hard enough at that goal for long enough. Most people won't, and it's certainly not easy for most people.

July 27, 2010

I think she said it was possible, not easy. Don't confuse the two.

I think it is possible for most people to graduate medical school, if they work hard enough at that goal for long enough. Most people won't, and it's certainly not easy for most people.

Then I misunderstood, because it IS easy. Hard would be to try and get into the shape of someone like USMCHokie that posts around here. Losing weight is simply a matter of choice. Choose to eat different and choose to exercise instead of sitting on your rump.

July 27, 2010

I apologize if my post came off as a rant to fat chicks.

Here is my solution to the problem..

Calorie IN < Calorie OUT. Having a deficit will surely result in fat loss.

Combine with cardio + weights.

There is no sugar coating it. I exposed the absolute truth as to exactly why men don't like fat ladies. If any of you actually watched the video you would know what I'm talking about.

In no way am I berating plus sizes, it's a post intended to take action.

I gave insight as to why most men don't like large women. Some people are actually oblivious to these things.

What if I posted I can't get women because I'm too skinny, yet I have no idea why??!

Then someone posted a video about a female saying... Skinny men are just skin and bones, it hurts to be intimate with them. Skinny men use much less resources which in turn makes me feel self conscious about myself. The list goes on, now the male finally realizes the truth. He might come to the conclusion that, "I never knew me being so skinny had that much of a detrimental effect!"

Having that realization he is able to make a choice. Take control of his life.

The next time someone posts would you date a large women? Here are 15 reasons why men don't. Next time someone talks about his girl friend having too much flub, here is why most men don't like it and would leave you if you let go.

Take it for what you want.. A rant, informative post, declarative statement, whatever.

My intention was to give you insight on what guys thought about this issue.

Not to merely state men don't like fat chicks, but why they don't like them.

P.S. Paddington bear I'd bet you're a cute gal. I couldn't imagine how much cuter you'd be if you lost a bit of flub though? <3

Edited July 27, 2010 by JadedHeart

July 27, 2010

Never going to fix your problem by just whining about it. Just stfu about it and go lose weight.

Just like men whining about not being confident shouldn't whine about it and should just stfu and go get confident.

Right?

You know what else is "easy" to do besides losing weight?

Not being an *******. So just stfu and do it and stop whining about everyone else in the world.

July 27, 2010

You know what else is "easy" to do besides losing weight?

Not being an *******. So just stfu and do it and stop whining about everyone else in the world.

lol u mad?

July 27, 2010

lol u mad?

Why? Were you?

I just imitated your style of debating (and added proper punctuation to it.)

July 27, 2010

Why? Were you?

I just imitated your style of debating (and added proper punctuation to it.)

Nope. There also wasn't any debating. Just once again pointing out a glaring double standard on this board you women and the white knights have around here. Predictably one of you raged hard at it and basically just reaffirmed the point.

July 27, 2010

Nope. There also wasn't any debating. Just once again pointing out a glaring double standard on this board you women and the white knights have around here. Predictably one of you raged hard at it and basically just reaffirmed the point.

So you were agreeing with her then? I guess I misunderstood.

Your point was that she should quit whining and do something. My point was that you should quit whining as well. Was that the point I was re-affirming? That you whine too much?

Because I didn't say anything to the other people who posted in this thread arguing with pattington bear. Just you. Because they actually try to debate and not whine and insult people.

July 27, 2010

So you were agreeing with her then? I guess I misunderstood.

Your point was that she should quit whining and do something. My point was that you should quit whining as well. Was that the point I was re-affirming? That you whine too much?

Because I didn't say anything to the other people who posted in this thread arguing with pattington bear. Just you. Because they actually try to debate and not whine and insult people.

Lol u so mad. Why u mad?

July 27, 2010

Lol u so mad. Why u mad?

No, I'm enjoying myself. I always got a troll where I want him when he's responding to my posts. It means they're getting to him, especially the more he insults me.

July 27, 2010

No, I'm enjoying myself. I always got a troll where I want him when he's responding to my posts. It means they're getting to him, especially the more he insults me.

That's funny because I'm enjoying myself. I always got a troll where I want him when he's responding to my posts. It means they're getting to him, especially the more he insults me.

July 27, 2010

That's funny because I'm enjoying myself. I always got a troll where I want him when he's responding to my posts. It means they're getting to him, especially the more he insults me.

That's funny because I'm enjoying myself. I always got a troll where I want him when he's responding to my posts. It means they're getting to him, especially the more he insults me.

July 27, 2010

That's funny because I'm enjoying myself. I always got a troll where I want him when he's responding to my posts. It means they're getting to him, especially the more he insults me.

Are you aware that there are people in this world that have a severe medical condition which causes them to be that way?

July 27, 2010

Are you aware that there are people in this world that have a severe medical condition which causes them to be that way?

That's funny because I'm enjoying myself. I always got a troll where I want him when he's responding to my posts. It means they're getting to him, especially the more he insults me.

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