StussyMagnet Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 Long story short. Dated for approx a year. Very rocky due to previous abuse in her last relationship. Was on and off more times than I care to remember. Always her breaking up and always her coming back. She would freak out and say she couldn't be in a relationship. So, after one of our breakups and makeups, I saksed her if it would help if the next time she freaks out, I'd give her space, she agreed that it might be a good idea. So, as sure as eggs is eggs, about 2 weeks after that (during which she told me her life felt empty when i wasn't around), she started acting distant again; one word texts, not answering phone etc, so i told her i'd give her space and she knew how to reach me. Got a very basic text reply saying OK. 1 wek went by - nothing, 2 weeks, still nothing. After 3 weeks I contacted her via IM (yeah, stupid move I know) and she told me that it was over, she can't be in a relationship. We tried friends for a few months but it was just too damn hard for me. Told her about 6 weeks ago that I couldn't be just friend, I'd always be looking for more. So, that was the end of all contact. I saw her about 3 weeks ago and we just kinda nodded to each other and said Hi, both kept walking. Today I saw her walking down the street and panicked. I just froze and ignored her. I'm pretty sure she saw me, and saw me looking at her. I looked away and kept walking. Now I feel really bad. I feel like emailing her and apologising for ignoring her. So folks, should I? Any other thoughts on this relationship? I still miss her like hell :-(
cdt76 Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 Dude, how do you know she was not trying to hide from you too? Don't contact her. If she wanted you, she'd make it clear. Keep your chin up and dont' contact her.
Perhaps Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 Long story short. Dated for approx a year. Very rocky due to previous abuse in her last relationship. Was on and off more times than I care to remember. Always her breaking up and always her coming back. She would freak out and say she couldn't be in a relationship. So, after one of our breakups and makeups, I saksed her if it would help if the next time she freaks out, I'd give her space, she agreed that it might be a good idea. So, as sure as eggs is eggs, about 2 weeks after that (during which she told me her life felt empty when i wasn't around), she started acting distant again; one word texts, not answering phone etc, so i told her i'd give her space and she knew how to reach me. Got a very basic text reply saying OK. 1 wek went by - nothing, 2 weeks, still nothing. After 3 weeks I contacted her via IM (yeah, stupid move I know) and she told me that it was over, she can't be in a relationship. We tried friends for a few months but it was just too damn hard for me. Told her about 6 weeks ago that I couldn't be just friend, I'd always be looking for more. So, that was the end of all contact. I saw her about 3 weeks ago and we just kinda nodded to each other and said Hi, both kept walking. Today I saw her walking down the street and panicked. I just froze and ignored her. I'm pretty sure she saw me, and saw me looking at her. I looked away and kept walking. Now I feel really bad. I feel like emailing her and apologising for ignoring her. So folks, should I? Any other thoughts on this relationship? I still miss her like hell :-( How dare you feel bad for ignoring her? You have first picks when it comes to your self-respect, not her. Let her see that you don't need her. Just keep your head held high and keep on walking and learning from every step.
Username37 Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 She probably was dodging you too. By ignoring her, it shows her you don't need her, which is a good thing. No contact. Like cdt said. She'll make it clear if she wanted you back. Good luck dude
Author StussyMagnet Posted July 27, 2010 Author Posted July 27, 2010 I don't think I could get back with her even if she wanted it. Far too much water under the bridge. I thought we could be friends. During every other break up, we would have a talk about her freaking out, I'd reassure her that all would be OK and, after I'd had a bit of time to heal, we would be friends. I really wouldn't have had a problem with being her friends after these breakups. The last breakup though, she just dissappeared for 3 weeks and then only told me it was over when I contacted her. She split up with me over IM!! I had (and still am) having a hard time understanding how she could be so heartless and do that to someone who, 3 weeks earlier, she had told was like a ray of sunshine in her life. i can't understand why she chose to finish it like that. Her actions have pretty much ruined any chance I have of wanting to be friend with her. And that makes me really sad. I really thought this girl would be in my life in some form or another for a long time. Sorry, just a bit of a vent there!
Ilovecake Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 Apologizing would only make you look desperate for her approval. She’s not interested in talking to you, or being your friend, or your apologies. Just leave the girl alone, she is no longer part of your life therefore you have nothing to apologize for. You’re just looking for an excuse to get back in contact with someone who doesn’t want to be in contact with you. Don’t humiliate yourself like that.
bonpaw2008 Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 LOL your girl and my guy were made for each other!!! Same thing that I went through, every month like clock-work he would get distant, f something up, get mean and belligerent for no reason, etc. There is NO REASON for you to feel bad. It is over, you are on NC, you did the right thing.
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