Parlanchina Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 I just recently broke up with my bf of 4 years. We were having problems for a couple of months now and we were at the breaking point....We just found out that the core issue was him having no plans for the future for us. For him, the future basically consists of the next few weeks. It made so much effect on the security of the relationship, especially with all the changes and the physical distance between us. It was a mutual break up, though I wanted it more... because I knew it wasn't fair for the both of us. Me wanting this and him wanting another direction in life. I wanted to find someone who wouldn't think a future with me woun;dn't be such a bad idea. and someone I wouldn't have to force to have a place for me in his life. I initiated the break up and it was a very sad. There were no raised voices, just sadness and regret. I was resigned that he wanted something different from this. After 4 years, wouldn't he have the idea if I was the one he wanted or not, right? A few days after we broke up, he called me to ask to meet him. Long story short, he asked me if there was a chance to get back together because he wanted us to work, to continue to be together... He told me he was unsure at first, but now it was clear that I was the one he wanted to marry. He told me this wasn't the proposal yet, but that it was the plan for us. He told me maybe the reason why I was feeling "un"secure was because he never mentioned anything about us and that I thought I had no place in his life because he never said anything about what we were going to do in the future. I never expected a sudden change. I was ready to move on. I'm just really really scared that he hasn't thought for a long time about this decision to get back and have plans to marry (all of a sudden??). and I'm afraid it's not real. I didn't mean to break up with him so it would force him to marry me!! I wanted some time for him to think, for him to be free to do whatever he may want to do. At the same time I wanted to find something for me out there, something that's just for me, too. Help me, please. I don't know. I'm sorry if its so long.
skydiveaddict Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 your relationship has run it;s course you need to face each other and decide if a life together is really what you want
BellaBellaBella Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 Aren't you the same girl who was having issues, when he wouldn't include you in going out with his girl pals? Did he hook up with one of them?
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