PortuguesePrincess80 Posted July 25, 2010 Share Posted July 25, 2010 I have a wacky sister in law who has 3 kids just moved out of her parents house and feels the need to party all of a sudden. She just asked me if I could stay with her 3 kids next weekend (a long weekend to boot). She can barely get by with the money she gets (she doesnt work) She basically told her mom this morning that I was planning to go to their house next weekend and am taking care of her kids...without my asking! On top of it all..I was at her place yesterday..and she didnt have the gull to ask me..cause in all reality..I probably would've said no. She then calls me up like 15 mins ago..and asked if I was going upnorth to her parents house. I said I really dont know..knowing that shes already planned all this crap behind my back. Anyhow..she goes on to tell me that my hubby told his mother he is going up...which I don't really care if he is or not as he went up this weekend with our son and I didn't! She said that her mother OFFERED to take care of the kids as long as I could take them up. Meanwhile shes lied to both her mother and me and had all these plans made up already. I told her I don't know what I'm doing next weekend..and really depends on how much work I have during the week...I work a min of 60 hours a week..while shes on her ass all day. Shes 35...has 3 kids ages 10 5 and 10 months..no guy in the picture..on socail assisstance..can barely feed her kids and wants to go partying for the weekend! I am 30 with one kid..2 jobs and really want my weekends to relax after my long work weeks. Am I being a total bitch about this or do I have every right to say no and not feel guilty?? Link to post Share on other sites
OnlyJake Posted July 27, 2010 Share Posted July 27, 2010 Her kids, her problem. Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Am I being a total bitch about this or do I have every right to say no and not feel guilty?? Of course it's your right to say no and not feel guilty. But sometimes it can help to make a decision taking into account the alternative: Would you rather (a) say no, have your weekend to yourself, and feel a little guilty, or (b) say yes, spend the weekend exhausting yourself taking care of other people's kids, and feel a whole lotta anger and resentment? Option A kinda makes more sense, yes? -- and when/if you do start to feel any twinges of guilt...just remind yourself of the alternative that you avoided, and carry on having a great, relaxing weekend Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Her kids, her problem. I second this. If you look after her kids for the weekend, chances are she's going to run wild and come home pregnant again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PortuguesePrincess80 Posted July 28, 2010 Author Share Posted July 28, 2010 Thanks for the responses. I have in fact declined the babysitting..and now she's all pee'd off at me! Oh well...**** happens. And you are right D-Lish...chances are she will end up with a baby #4 sooner or later..cause shes already brought some dude home for the last few days..and she just got her own place 2 weeks ago. Poor kids! Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Thanks for the responses. I have in fact declined the babysitting..and now she's all pee'd off at me! Oh well...**** happens. And you are right D-Lish...chances are she will end up with a baby #4 sooner or later..cause shes already brought some dude home for the last few days..and she just got her own place 2 weeks ago. Poor kids! Who cares if she's peeved- they are her kids, her responsibility. And just curious, what has sis-in-law done;) for YOU lately? Link to post Share on other sites
brainygirl Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 Single mamas have a right to get out every now and then, and its really no one's business how they pay (unless they are barrowing the cash from you), but she really should have been upfront and asked the people to do this, rather than manipulating people into it. OP has every right to be peeved and to decline. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PortuguesePrincess80 Posted July 29, 2010 Author Share Posted July 29, 2010 Who cares if she's peeved- they are her kids, her responsibility. And just curious, what has sis-in-law done;) for YOU lately? lol...thanks for that D-Lish! She has done crap for me lately! Link to post Share on other sites
Author PortuguesePrincess80 Posted July 29, 2010 Author Share Posted July 29, 2010 Single mamas have a right to get out every now and then, and its really no one's business how they pay (unless they are barrowing the cash from you), but she really should have been upfront and asked the people to do this, rather than manipulating people into it. OP has every right to be peeved and to decline. Manipulation is exactly whats shes done. And you are right..its none of my business if she uses my tax dollars to go out! Regardless..if your whining that you have no money for the cookies your kids are eating..and wanting to go rent a hotel and party all weekend...kinda makes you wonder where her priorities lie. Link to post Share on other sites
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